2-for-Tuesday: JBL OnBeat Mini with Lightning Connector
- Model # JBLONBEATPRCBLKAM
- Each purchase includes two stupid speaker docks
- No Bluetooth, it must enslave your phone or tablet to charge and play it
- Rechargeable battery enables use as portable stereo system - OK, that’s its one saving grace, kinda
- Turns out it’s compatible with the latest iPhones/iPads (and USB connected players), too, by accident
We've solved the sellout problem.
Morning people and East Coast residents, we just want to say: we don’t specifically try to pick deals that’ll sell out in the middle of the night. Honest. When we put that Cobra car charger on the schedule for this past Saturday, we fully expected to see ample quantities thick on the ground by Sunday brunch. We were as surprised as anyone that they were all gone in half an hour.
Well, we never claimed to be geniuses, but certainly we can’t be that (happily) wrong two days in a row. Especially when Sunday’s deal was the Kershaw Snow White knife, which is distinguished from other compact EDC knives only by its white handle. Plenty of those for the late risers - oh, hey, sold out in an hour and a half.
OK, OK, so for Monday, we were like, what do we have a huge quantity of? Like, so many that it could never possibly sell out? Ooh, look, 150,000 Built NY laptop and tablet sleeves. Not a chance those’ll sell out. Not even if we sell them in quantities of 10, 20, or 30. No way, right?
Yes way. The bundles of 30 were gone in a couple of hours. They were all gone by the time people got to work in their NY buildings.
So it’s time to hit this sellout syndrome with everything we’ve got. Time for the nuclear option. Time to do - quite literally - our worst.
It’s time for speaker docks. Longtime fans will know how we feel about speaker docks, especially non-Bluetooth ones like this. It’s just stoopid to plonk yer phone down in one place to listen to it. The JBL OnBeat Mini might be the best one, with its rechargeable battery, semi-decent speaker, and its compatibility with the latest iPads. But we can’t say “it’s the only speaker dock you should buy”, because you shouldn’t buy any speaker docks.
But a lame product is only one half of the equation. We’ve also got buttload after buttload of them. Low demand plus near-bottomless supply equals no sellout. And if you suspect we’re working some kind of reverse psychology to get you to think there might be a sellout so you better buy one… no. We’re not that sophisticated. We seriously have so many of these, they won’t sell out.
So belly up to the buffet, Eastern Time Zone! The food stinks but there’s plenty of it.