Today's SideDeal
Einova Charging Stones (Dual or 2-Pack Single) (Refurbished)
- Choose between a couple smaller charging pads or one big one
- A few different styles to choose from
- Refurbished, but don’t worry: they don’t even remember the phones they used to charge
- Can they make a margarita: No, but they might seem like a good place to put down a margarita (the emphasis on ‘look’ here; please don’t put margs on these)
With Great Power
Doctor Terror looked out over the cliff. His robotic arms hung at his side as he scanned the vista, as tranquil as it was beautiful, the microchips in his eyes picking up no threats on the horizon.
“Quiet out here,” said Mister Fists, Doctor Terror’s main enforcer.
“Yes,” said Doctor Terror. “Almost too quiet.”
No sooner had the words left his mouth than he heard a loud “YEE-HAW!” It came not from in front or behind him, not even from above him. No, Doctor Terror couldn’t believe it; the cry seemed to emanate from the ground below his feet.
He leapt to the side just as the Cosmic Cowboy, hero of the people, burst up through the dusty surface on which they stood. As the do-gooder rose, he swung his famed magic lasso, catching Mister Fists and sealing him in an ice-like substance.
“Howdy pardners,” called out the Cosmic Cowboy, floating above them. “Did I surprise y’all?”
Doctor Terror dusted himself off and got to his feet. “Perhaps you did. I thought such trickery was beneath you.”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” the Cosmic Cowboy said with a sly grin. “Such trickery was actually beneath you!”
“Very funny,” Doctor Terror said.
“Your friend ain’t laughing,” the Cosmic Cowboy said, gesturing with his chin to the still-frozen Mister Fists. “And without your muscle, I ain’t like your chances against me.”
“And yet,” Doctor Terror said, his own face contorting in a sickening smile. “We are both without our sidekicks, are we not?”
“Horse Girl’s just back at the Floating Ranch, takin’ care of a few things,” said the Cosmic Cowboy.
“Oh, is she?” Now, Doctor Terror tapped a button on his right robotic arm with his left robotic hand, bringing up a hologram of Horse Girl, tied to a chair, surrounded by Doctor Terror’s dreaded snake sentries.
“Cosmic Cowboy! You have to help me!” Horse Girl cried.
“You monster,” Cosmic Cowboy yelled, floating to the ground, one hand still holding the end of his lasso, the other gripped in a tight fist.
“Careful,” Doctor Terror said. “An inch closer, and she’ll be thrown to the bottom of the volcano into which I’ve built my secret lair.”
Cosmic Cowboy stopped in the air, a sheen of angry sweat forming just under his ten-gallon hat. “What do you want?” he hissed through gritted teeth.
“The power stones,” Doctor Terror said.
Reluctantly, the Cosmic Cowboy tossed him the pouch he’d had hooked to the side of his belt. “Don’t think you’ll get away with this.”
Doctor Terror laughed, maniacally. “Oh, but I will! In less than an hour, I’ll be back at my lair, and now that I have these, I’ll have everything I need… to charge my phone.”
The Cosmic Cowboy blinked. “Charge your phone? Pardner, I think you’ve got the wrong thing. What y’all are looking for are the Charging Stones from Einova. They’re charging pads that look pleasantly stone-like.”
Doctor Terror looked down at the pouch. “And what are these?”
“They’re power stones,” the Cosmic Cowboy said. “They allow the power of the universe to flow through whoever possesses them.”
“Yikes,” said Doctor Terror tossing them back to the Cosmic Cowboy. “Sounds like a bit much. I’m just tired of missing important texts because my phone keeps dying. I just get impatient and unplug it while it’s charging and then forget to plug it back in. A pad, I believe, would allow me to lay it back down without thinking. Plus, you know, the stone aesthetic is nice when you live in a place carved out of volcanic rock. Anyway, sorry for the misunderstanding. I’ll get those Einova Charging Stones you mentioned.”
“And horse girl?” the Cosmic Cowboy said.
Oh, of course, yeah. I’ll let her go," Doctor Terror said, scratching the back of his head, embarrassed. “You mind unfreezing Mister Fists?”
“Oh, totally.” With a tweak of the Cosmic Cowboy’s wrist, the lasso released, leaving Mister Fists unfrozen. He fell to the ground and gasped for air.
“Anyway, see you around,” Doctor Terror said.
“For sure,” said the Cosmic Cowboy. “For sure.”
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