2-for-Tuesday: Rechargeable 5-in-1 Automotive Emergency Tools

  • In case of automotive emergency, save your ass with this 2-pack of emergency tools
  • Includes a work light, flashlight, emergency flasher, seatbelt cutter, and glass hammer
  • They’re waterproof, so that will be one less thing to worry about during your emergency
  • They’re rechargeable, last 4-10 hours on a single charge, and include a USB cable and cigarette adapter
  • Keep one in your own car and another in a person-whom-you’d-like-to-keep-alive’s car
  • FL3022 (Not to be confused with this handsome slab of wood held by and equally handsome man, which shares the same model number)
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A Gungbungadung

You know that feeling of wanting to do something that you really, really shouldn’t? Like pulling the emergency stop cord on a subway, yanking the fire alarm at the Four Seasons, or breaking your car’s window with an emergency window-breaking hammer?

I call this feeling a “gungbungadung,” and suggest you add it to your lexicon.

Meh writer @skemmehs here proselytizing one of my favorite words — gungbungadung. An acquaintance coined it many years ago, and I’ve been trying to spread it ever since. It’s that irrational desire to do something that would have clear negative results. Some of my recurring gungbungadungs include:

  • Jumping off a tall building
  • Breaking glass that is only supposed to be broken in case of emergency
  • Opening an airplane door (why do they make that lever so big?)
  • Grabbing a cop’s gun from his or her holster

I’ve never done any of these things, evinced by the fact that I am not imprisoned or dead, and that’s exactly what makes it a gungbungadung. You know you’re not going to do it — but you really want to, for reasons that make no sense.

Imagine hefting this 5-in-1 emergency tool in your hand. Now imagine looking at a nice big pane of glass. Now imagine breaking the pane with the tool’s glass-breaking hammer. Can you feel that strange sense of satisfaction? That’s a gungbungadung.

The word looks unwieldy, but try saying it out loud: Gung - Bunga — Dung. Gungbungadung. It sounds fitting, right?

In my years spreading the gospel of gungbungadung I have learned that some people do not experience — or claim not to experience — the sensation. “Why would I jump off a tall building for no reason?” They ask.

Y’know … because … it … is … a gungbungadung. There’s no reasonable way to explain it because it’s not a reasonable feeling. You either know it or you don’t.

Say it to yourself a few more times: Gungbungadung. Gungbungadung. And when you hold this pair of emergency hammers in your hand and stare at your grandmother’s bone china set, you’ll know how to describe the feeling.

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