JBL OnBeat Mini and/or Micro Speaker Dock with Lightning Connector
- Get the Micro ($20) or Mini ($30) or get both ($40) for $10 less
- Compatible with a long, tedious list of Lightning devices, up to and including iPhone 6 Plus and (for the OnBeat Mini) iPad Air 2 and iPad Mini 3 - see the specs for more details if you insist
- Model: JBLONBEATPRCBLKAM, JBLONBEATMICBLKAM
We're un-slashing prices!
Maybe we’ve been looking at this speaker dock thing all wrong. Maybe they aren’t really “a million Circuit City stores compressed into a black dwarf of pure imbecility”. Maybe we were mistaken when we called them “dribble from the Satanic anus of consumerism”. Maybe the only reason we think they’re “a nullity wrapped in suck suspended in a void of illogic” is because we got them so cheap.
We’re willing to admit that even sharp-eyed, Scroogian tightwads like us can be prone to price bias, to the assumption that expensive = good and cheap = bad. If pumping up the price for no good reason made Grey Goose vodka seem “premium” and turned a common African mineral into the much-coveted diamond, maybe it can rehabilitate speaker docks, too.
So that’s what we’re doing. Now that they cost a few bucks more, these JBL OnBeat speaker docks might seem less idiotic, less pointless, more “premium”. In the golden glow of conspicuous consumption, their obvious limitations - you have to surrender the use of your phone while it’s docked, you can’t control the music remotely, the Mini dock stands your iPad upright so it’s not even good for movies - might take on a new charm. And we won’t even make your mother (or mother-in-law) pester you to spend two months’ salary on them.
Don’t freak out, die-hard cheapskates. You can still get these at the old price if you buy both the larger Mini and the smaller Micro together. But we’re hoping the higher individual price tags will convince you to believe that speaker docks aren’t “the ebola of the junk electronics world”. Yes, even you. And even, especially, ourselves.