Amethyst Speaker Dock & Bluetooth Connect
- Model: Amethyst AX1REDUS
- Model: Amethyst IPUP-BK
- Model: XtremeMac USB-BTH-11
- Available in a wide variety of shapes, as long as wide equals two
- Includes Bluetooth Connect in case you actually want to use your phone while listening to whatever you’re listening to
- You’ll still have to admit to owning a 30-pin speaker dock
- But at least you didn’t buy it from Walmart
This was inevitable.
You had to see this coming, right? I mean, surely you’ve followed along as we shoveled speaker dock after speaker dock after speaker dock at you, all the while shouting about how awful and shitty and worthless they are without Bluetooth. And you saw the other day when we sold a few thousand of those Bluetooth Home Connects, yes?
And, ok, you probably didn’t see this, but we noticed Walmart and Amazon had this spaceship-looking motion-sensing speaker dock
with built-in Bluetooth and priced it at $250. Now built-in Bluetooth is certainly nicer than having to use a Bluetooth Connect in addition to a speaker dock, but no way is it $200+ nicer. And so…
The other night we were settling into our warehouse cots for the night (like you do), staring up at our towering boxes of speaker docks, and it all clicked. Speaker docks are not going away. They are the ebola of the junk electronics world: apparently unstoppable, and possibly existing within an uncomfortably short distance from you in the near future. Maybe there is some part of the human psyche who’s particularly susceptible to the speaker dock concept. Maybe people just like being forced to turn their smartphone into an old-timey and crappy-sounding immobile piece of garbage that’s not even taking advantage of its Bluetooth capabilities. We knew what we had to do.
You can get your speaker dock. You can get this bizarre spaceship-for-some-reason speaker dock, or the totally-normal-in-comparison black-puppy-shaped speaker dock. And then rather than leaving it on its own, Bluetoothless existence, sad, lonely, clinging to the only form of companionship it knows (a 30-pin dock or AUX IN cable), you’ll also get a Bluetooth connector, turning your stupid speaker dock into the kind of amazing, wonderful, miraculous Bluetooth-capable device that is, according to someone, somewhere, is suddenly worth $250.
If we’re going to have to live with speaker docks forever, and it looks like we are, we’re going to do what we can to make them slightly less awful. It’s inevitable.
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Amethyst Speaker Dock & Bluetooth Connect 145
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Totally Not Rigged Games of Chance 7
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Whether you're buying one or not, which shape of speaker dock is better? 9
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Accept the Goat. Become the Goat. 28 -
[Thanksgiving] Who gets their turkey from somewhere that’s not a grocery store? 27 -
Noms de Parm: Shoddy Goods 017 5 -
This is cool. 1 -
In the How’d you get here list: 3