The ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Bundle
- The 144 pieces of caffeinated gum are delicious; just ask Shawn.
- The Two breathalyzers are single-use so don’t waste them after taking one sip of wine cooler.
- You also get Four USB cables (three of the printer kind, and a more normal USB 3.0 one).
- And don’t forget the island-scene printed shower curtains, guaranteed to take you down to Kokomo, if you know what we mean! (We mean they’ll keep water in the shower.)
- Model: UC4LL1TBUNDL35
You Call It
We’re going to let you all in a little secret: sometimes, these bundles we sell on Saturdays? They’re not really bundles at all. Well, they are products bundled together. But they don’t have much to do with each other.
You probably didn’t realize this thanks to our inimitable marketing team (especially our world-class copywriter’s) ability to string them together in some totally coherent way. But it’s true. And what else is true, it can be pretty fun. So fun, in fact, that we’re going to let YOU do it this week.
What we’ve got here is some caffeinated gum, two single-use breathalyzers, four weird USB cables, and two ugly island-scene shower curtains.
Just to clarify: we are in no way trying to get you to do our jobs for us. Nor are we confounded by our own selection of completely unrelated products and doing this in an attempt to pass the confusion onto you. Don’t be ridiculous! This is a cool fun game!
Now, we’re not totally handing over the reigns. Here are a few potential names to serve as examples:
- The Worst Improv Suggestions
- MacGyver’s Retirement Party Pack
- Psycho Starter Pack
- The Worst Chopped Basket
- Chews Your Own Adventure
- Witness Protection Consolation Prize
- Boy Scouts Rejection Kit
- The Convince Friends You’re Sober, Awake, and Relaxed Kit
- Crypto Jail Currency
- “The Fuck If I Know” Bundle
But we’re sure you can do better than that.
So please, head down to the poll and vote on one of the above suggestions if you want; otherwise, you can post your own.
Seriously, we need your help!
