Pretty Good

We’ll get to these pillows in a second. But first, allow us a tangent that we promise will better frame this sale.

Slate’s Decoder Ring podcast (a great listen, btw, in case you’ve never given it a try) put out an episode a couple years ago called “F––k Everything, We’re Doing Five Blades”. The episode takes its title from a 2004 Onion op-ed that imagines Gillette’s president crassly decrying the competition and looking ahead to an innovative new razor with 5 blades (which, hilariously, Gillette actually did later roll out).

If you were alive during the Razor Wars, you remember them. The Mach3. The Schick Quattro. The commercials showing blade after CGI-blade cutting a single facial hair closer and closer. It all felt absurd in the moment, and it looks even more absurd in retrospect. Further ramping up the silliness is the fact that the innovations keep coming. In that Decoder Ring episode, Atlantic journalist Caitlin Tiffany discusses going to the release event for the Gillette Fusion Pro Glide Flexible:

They had a big press event and then announce that it could cut your hair 23 microns shorter than the previous razor.

Wow! What a feat of engineering! What an impressive step forward!

But you know what? We see a lot of similarities between razors and pillows. Like razors, you can buy pillows that are shockingly cheap and not so shockingly shitty. But, also like razors, companies seem to forever be releasing new “innovative” pillows where said innovation seems less about improving the product and more about justifying the exorbitant price tag they put on them.

These pillows, on the other hand? They are totally nice pillows. They claim to stay cool and bounce back with ease. They’ll provide comfort and support thanks to their gel fiber filling. And they’re available in queen or king size.

Are they as nice as a pillow that’ll run you $150+? Almost certainly not. But probably, the difference between these pillows and a ridiculously expensive pillow is closer to the sleep equivalent of 23 microns than it is to the difference between these pillows and bargain bin pillows.

Which is especially rad, because we’re selling them for bargain bin prices.

So get some good pillows and sleep easy (because a. you have good pillows, and b. you didn’t get duped into spending a mortgage payment to get them).