@shahnm@yakkoTDI If you look at the last picture, I think “beef” is a code word for Irk! It’s made of Irk!
(It says it’s a “life changing bar” after all…)
@DrunkCat
I believe they made a special thread just for you.
Jus sayen…
I did, but not just for them. I hoped DrunkCat would join the discussion, which has turned out to be most interesting (thank you all), and leave other threads alone, but they said they won’t.
And this apparent obsession about putting quotes around AI. I don’t get that one at all.
@ItalianScallion@Lynnerizer LLMs are not Artificial Intelligence. It genuinely is the worlds most expensive and inefficient autocomplete. T9 was far more advance and intelligent than what techbros these day call “AI”.
@DrunkCat@PooltoyWolf@troy@winfield@yakkoTDI yes, it’s a VERY liberal use of the word “roast”. A chatbot would have done much better…be better than the chat bots that u despise!
@lkblaser First glance I was onboard, “mmm, chocolate sea salt sounds nice!” Then I started reading the ingredient list, “kidney powder, liver powder, heart powder”
@FightingMongoos@lkblaser I know. It is like using the word chocolate in the name as a bait and switch. The ingrediants make it sound absolutely gross and if there really is much chocolate in there I am presuming it is to try to hide the horrible taste of the rest of the stuff. The operative word is try. This certainly would be one way to ruin perfectly good chocolate.
@Num1Zero Stevia and monkfruit are pretty easy on the GI tract relative to many other sweeteners. The pea protein does cause issues for many though. Not sure how I feel about assorted beef proteins in a chocolate bar either.
@ciabelle@Num1Zero I see that “allulose” is pretty high in the list (right above pea protein) — but I don’t know enough about any of those things to say if that’s a problem or not.
(probably it’s one of those things that varies from person to person)
The “assorted beef proteins in a chocolate bar” part is the weirdest one for me. I think I’m okay with it… maybe?
At this point I think my biggest turn-off is that it’s probably trying to be sweet. At lot of keto treats try to be that, but I don’t want/need my chocolate to be sweet. (well, sweeter than plain cacao is okay, but Snickers-level sweet is not my thing)
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@Num1Zero@xobzoo Good catch on the allulose. Not listed in the ingredients in the description, only on the picture of the label It definitely can cause GI issues. And it was very disingenuous for the write-up to claim it just had a small amount of stevia way down in the list.
@ItalianScallion@troy Well if you buy very few of them then they will sell out. Good plan for things that are “interesting” but not in a good way. Meh gets a point for that on this product.
By the way for margarita use maybe you could attempt to make a margarita “healthy” by adding these to that? There. Fixed your home page product description for you since you seem to have lost your margarita mention streak on this one.
Know your role, meh. None of us are on a keto diet. Haven’t you heard of Ozempic? Yeah, we can’t afford that either. We’re just fat consumers. I don’t need extra calories with my chocolate.
@goldnectar Speak for yourself, Pal. I do agree that Keto snacks are kind of nonsense though. They are okay for the first two or three weeks when you are still weaning yourself off of simple sugars. After a month or so, though, sweet stuff becomes really unnecessary. Keto snacks sell more to faux health-conscious housewives than they do hardcore dieters deep in a keto cycle.
@axelexa@goldnectar The food bank I volunteer at got a pile of Keto ice cream bars on a stick off the truck last Wednesday and so we had to eat them since no room in the freezer and you can’t hand out stuff like that due to melting (well I supposed you could have keto soup with melted ice cream). I ate one and it was only so so. No idea what was in the ingredients as I was handed it and didn’t read the box.
I don’t think I’ve ever (knowingly) eaten dessicated heart, spleen and pancreas powder. Certainly not with chocolate. I’m sort of oddly intrigued by these.
I’ve got two vegan friends: one does it for health reasons due to his advancing and, the other is an idiot who probably is going to give herself diabetes before she’s half his she with all the deep-fried foods she’s having.
Like potatoes double fried in peanut oil and stuffed in bread is still vegan, this is is keto “food” only on a technicality.
i bet these beef pancreas chocolate bars taste really good. people were probably like, “these taste so good, they can’t be good for me,” and that’s why nobody was buying them and how meh was able to score such a deal.
There are so many food words in the name of the product that it already sounded like an unappetizing combination…and then I looked at the ingredients list and have to agree with a bunch of other replies here. No thank you! (I’m not a fan of putting salt into chocolate anyway!)
@PooltoyWolf technically salt is a flavor enhancer. A few crystals of salt on a KitKat will enhance the flavors, but a few crystals more and all you taste is salt.
I hate to say it but I can’t even remotely imagine how that combination of ingredients would taste good. So how many of today’s product did you buy for yourself?
/showme troy’s tastebuds react to a bacon, chocolate, dessicated heart powder, salt, peanut butter and banana milkshake
I decided to google that organ blend and apparently it’s a thing. it’s not gross, per se, so go for it, LOL.
What’s the most interesting product you find?
I just bought 5 BOXES I hope they CLEAN me out I don’t mind the squirts at all
TMI INDEED.
I just hope they are sweet enough, as long as they are sweet I don’t care what they taste like. Since I’ll eat them with other protein bars 2 days a week. MAKES staying under 500 calories a BREEZE on SEMI FASTED days
First impression: no. Second impression: not a HARD no but it’ll taste good blended into my shakes. The guts n stuff don’t bother me since it’s nutritionally still good for you and it reduces food waste.
I agree with wundumguy that the first impression on these is not great. At first I thought it was like eating a powdery block of baker’s chocolate. Luckily, the taste and the texture got better after it was in your mouth for a bit. I ended up enjoying it enough to look forward to the next one.
got mine today. kind of chalky, but not unpleasant. chocolate flavor definitely came through, but i didn’t really get any saltiness. i might smash some flake salt into the next bar i eat. i look forward to eating these, but i probably would not buy this flavor again.
These are actually pretty good. Kind of powdery in the center, but not too much. Did not taste any saltiness. Bonus - once I explained what is in them, they are safe from family predators.
Specs
Product: 20-Pack: KiZE Keto Steak Shake Chocolate Sea Salt Protein Bars
Model: 854198004681
Condition: New
What’s Included?
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Thursday, Apr 17 - Monday, Apr 21
/giphy horror
@shahnm Only if they were actual shakes. The horror would be complete.
@shahnm @yakkoTDI If you look at the last picture, I think “beef” is a code word for Irk! It’s made of Irk!
(It says it’s a “life changing bar” after all…)
@shahnm @xobzoo @yakkoTDI These should go well with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.
@shahnm just offal
@shahnm What the actual…
@pakopako
/giphy applause
So is anyone actually eating them before?
The keto a good life is never using “AI”.
@DrunkCat bro.
@DrunkCat @troy Leave him alone. If he keeps up his crusade maybe she will take him back.
@troy @yakkoTDI who is she?
@DrunkCat @troy @yakkoTDI idk man i loved the photoshops. the ai pictures are way less classy. i’m with drunkcat on this one
@DrunkCat
I believe they made a special thread just for you.
Jus sayen…
@DrunkCat @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI Most of us agree. It’s their constant, nonstop, irrepressible replies in every single thread that irritate.
@PooltoyWolf @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI It’s just one roast a deal, relax guy.
@Lynnerizer
I did, but not just for them. I hoped DrunkCat would join the discussion, which has turned out to be most interesting (thank you all), and leave other threads alone, but they said they won’t.
And this apparent obsession about putting quotes around AI. I don’t get that one at all.
@ItalianScallion @Lynnerizer LLMs are not Artificial Intelligence. It genuinely is the worlds most expensive and inefficient autocomplete. T9 was far more advance and intelligent than what techbros these day call “AI”.
@DrunkCat @PooltoyWolf @troy @winfield
No so much a roast as a turd in the punch bowl.
@PooltoyWolf @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI You can thank “AI” for the turd.
@DrunkCat @PooltoyWolf @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI yes, it’s a VERY liberal use of the word “roast”. A chatbot would have done much better…be better than the chat bots that u despise!
@PooltoyWolf @TimW @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI “u”
@DrunkCat @troy @winfield @yakkoTDI I personally consider that excessive and annoying. YMMV.
Eek. This sounds awful!
@lkblaser First glance I was onboard, “mmm, chocolate sea salt sounds nice!” Then I started reading the ingredient list, “kidney powder, liver powder, heart powder”
@FightingMongoos @lkblaser I know. It is like using the word chocolate in the name as a bait and switch. The ingrediants make it sound absolutely gross and if there really is much chocolate in there I am presuming it is to try to hide the horrible taste of the rest of the stuff. The operative word is try. This certainly would be one way to ruin perfectly good chocolate.
If you love chocolate and diarrhea, then this is the deal for you! The keto squirts are stronger with each bite! But it’s worth it.
@Num1Zero Stevia and monkfruit are pretty easy on the GI tract relative to many other sweeteners. The pea protein does cause issues for many though. Not sure how I feel about assorted beef proteins in a chocolate bar either.
@ciabelle @Num1Zero I see that “allulose” is pretty high in the list (right above pea protein) — but I don’t know enough about any of those things to say if that’s a problem or not.
(probably it’s one of those things that varies from person to person)
The “assorted beef proteins in a chocolate bar” part is the weirdest one for me. I think I’m okay with it… maybe?
At this point I think my biggest turn-off is that it’s probably trying to be sweet. At lot of keto treats try to be that, but I don’t want/need my chocolate to be sweet. (well, sweeter than plain cacao is okay, but Snickers-level sweet is not my thing)
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@ciabelle @xobzoo it’s a chocolate hot dog!
@Num1Zero @xobzoo Good catch on the allulose. Not listed in the ingredients in the description, only on the picture of the label It definitely can cause GI issues. And it was very disingenuous for the write-up to claim it just had a small amount of stevia way down in the list.
I would avoid these like the plague!
Future IRK item.
@ItalianScallion Nope! I smell sellout (but I know how many we have
)
@ItalianScallion If you look at the last picture, it’s a current Irk item… or Irk is currently it, or …
something something something…
Soylent chocolate is Irk!
(It says it’s a “life changing bar” after all…)
@xobzoo I don’t know if I’d say Irk but from the ingredients I’d definitely say URK.
@ItalianScallion @troy that’s a relief at least. I think if I tried to donate these to the food pantry, they would give them back
@ItalianScallion @troy Well if you buy very few of them then they will sell out. Good plan for things that are “interesting” but not in a good way. Meh gets a point for that on this product.
By the way for margarita use maybe you could attempt to make a margarita “healthy” by adding these to that? There. Fixed your home page product description for you since you seem to have lost your margarita mention streak on this one.
@troy @dave @Thumperchick Edit fail on the blurb, second para ends early and then starts over. I didn’t read any of it beyond that
@werehatrack Thanks, fixed
@werehatrack
Know your role, meh. None of us are on a keto diet. Haven’t you heard of Ozempic? Yeah, we can’t afford that either. We’re just fat consumers. I don’t need extra calories with my chocolate.
@goldnectar Speak for yourself, Pal. I do agree that Keto snacks are kind of nonsense though. They are okay for the first two or three weeks when you are still weaning yourself off of simple sugars. After a month or so, though, sweet stuff becomes really unnecessary. Keto snacks sell more to faux health-conscious housewives than they do hardcore dieters deep in a keto cycle.
@axelexa @goldnectar The food bank I volunteer at got a pile of Keto ice cream bars on a stick off the truck last Wednesday and so we had to eat them since no room in the freezer and you can’t hand out stuff like that due to melting (well I supposed you could have keto soup with melted ice cream). I ate one and it was only so so. No idea what was in the ingredients as I was handed it and didn’t read the box.
I don’t think I’ve ever (knowingly) eaten dessicated heart, spleen and pancreas powder. Certainly not with chocolate. I’m sort of oddly intrigued by these.
@mehcuda67 You haven’t? Have I not invited you over for over for Sunday Brunch?
@mehcuda67 @yakkoTDI Whom are you eating at Sunday Brunch?
Reading the ingredients my jaw instinctively began cramping.
I’m sure someone will enjoy these.
Personally I think keto foods are really plumbing the depths of what is edible.
@Yombleflobber technically this is keto junk food.
I’ve got two vegan friends: one does it for health reasons due to his advancing and, the other is an idiot who probably is going to give herself diabetes before she’s half his she with all the deep-fried foods she’s having.
Like potatoes double fried in peanut oil and stuffed in bread is still vegan, this is is keto “food” only on a technicality.
I was in until I saw the 9g/43% of the RDA for saturated fat.
i bet these beef pancreas chocolate bars taste really good. people were probably like, “these taste so good, they can’t be good for me,” and that’s why nobody was buying them and how meh was able to score such a deal.
Strange - vegan treats for dogs yesterday, and ultra-carnivore chocolate bars for humans today.
?yaD sdrawkcaB
@Kyeh
‘They’re eating the cats; They’re eating the dogs!”
@Kyeh funnily enough, offal (organ) meats are the basics of animal chow. (Sort of like how sour apples are relegated to horse feed.)
You had me at “Desiccated Beef Organ Blend (Kidney Powder, Liver Powder, Heart Powder, Pancreas Powder, Spleen Powder)….”
@damjadi Mmmm, beef spleen powder
I just grabbed one of my Huel bars to compare. The Huel bar has more protein, same amount of carbs, way less saturated fats.
Suffice it to say, no thanks.
@gwrankin
$30 for 12, though…
Mmm. Chocolate steak. Now only 15% offal!
(Seriously though, organ meat is fine, but the allulose is probably going to make this too sweet.)
@pakopako Also stevia in the ingredient list.
There are so many food words in the name of the product that it already sounded like an unappetizing combination…and then I looked at the ingredients list and have to agree with a bunch of other replies here. No thank you! (I’m not a fan of putting salt into chocolate anyway!)
@PooltoyWolf technically salt is a flavor enhancer. A few crystals of salt on a KitKat will enhance the flavors, but a few crystals more and all you taste is salt.
@pakopako To me, putting salt in chocolate would be like putting bacon in a banana milkshake.
@PooltoyWolf …which is also good! Add some peanut butter and you’ve got yourself an Elvis Milkshake. I’m all about sweet+savory combinations
@troy Definitely not for me!
@PooltoyWolf @troy
I hate to say it but I can’t even remotely imagine how that combination of ingredients would taste good. So how many of today’s product did you buy for yourself?
/showme troy’s tastebuds react to a bacon, chocolate, dessicated heart powder, salt, peanut butter and banana milkshake
Dessicated heart powder sounds like my order number.
What the hell.
/buy
@wooterondo It worked! Your order number is: tolerant-maniacal-lunch
/showme tolerant maniacal lunch
@wooterondo It sounds like a warning!
@wooterondo
/showme a Meh order named dessicated heart powder
@mediocrebot Hearts of cicadas?
WtfBlink182.gif
Well, at least it’s really easy to work out how these ended up here.
I decided to google that organ blend and apparently it’s a thing. it’s not gross, per se, so go for it, LOL.
What’s the most interesting product you find?
https://lineageprovisions.com/
Sells products to blend in a smoothie as a protein powder
@Cerridwyn I beg to differ. It IS gross per se.
Q: Is it available in Georgia Red?
A: I don’t even care. Just the thought of dessicated beef organ blend is… yummm!!
Eeeww.
“Desiccated heart” - sounds like some oligarchs I can think of.
Sigh. Ordered 10 seconds after the second opening. Sold out
@user42030226
Gotta hand it to you, @troy. You had this one pegged!
Yeah what happened there, I was waiting haha
Too late now, but this reminded me, in the 1970s wasn’t this a music performer?
/youtube captain beefheart
The one day I don’t check at midnight is an actual cool new product I’d like to try. Son of a…
@vinberdon
/showme son of a chocolate dessicated heart powder product
/showme a biologically accurate heart bleeding liquid chocolate
Something went terribly wrong. Please try again.
/showme a chocolate pump shaped like a biologically accurate heart pumping out powdered chocolate
Mehers yearn for the beef chocolate.
So you want to eat human parts?
And this one is how to catch a human to eat
I just bought 5 BOXES
I hope they CLEAN me out I don’t mind the squirts at all
TMI INDEED.
I just hope they are sweet enough, as long as they are sweet I don’t care what they taste like. Since I’ll eat them with other protein bars 2 days a week. MAKES staying under 500 calories a BREEZE on SEMI FASTED days
First impression: no. Second impression: not a HARD no but it’ll taste good blended into my shakes. The guts n stuff don’t bother me since it’s nutritionally still good for you and it reduces food waste.
I agree with wundumguy that the first impression on these is not great. At first I thought it was like eating a powdery block of baker’s chocolate. Luckily, the taste and the texture got better after it was in your mouth for a bit. I ended up enjoying it enough to look forward to the next one.
got mine today. kind of chalky, but not unpleasant. chocolate flavor definitely came through, but i didn’t really get any saltiness. i might smash some flake salt into the next bar i eat. i look forward to eating these, but i probably would not buy this flavor again.
These are actually pretty good. Kind of powdery in the center, but not too much. Did not taste any saltiness. Bonus - once I explained what is in them, they are safe from family predators.