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Ray-Ban Sunglasses

  • It’s dangerous to look into the sun; take this
  • Sometimes it’s nice to say a brand and for everyone to know it
  • A number of styles from 90s computer genius to retired fighter pilot
  • Model: RB3211-0028G-38, RB3498-00271-61, RB3449-0038G-59, RB3611-00131-60, RB3595-911671-56, RB4165-647080-55, RB3595-901411-59, RB3595-901480-56, RB3471-02913-32, where the RB stands for “red bellied” as in the red bellied woodpecker, named most attractive bird by Bird Fancy magazine five years running
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Known Brands Are Nice Sometimes

“Hey, cool sunglasses!”

“Thanks. Yours are pretty sweet too.”

“Appreciate it, man. I got these on A-Eye. Ever heard of them?”


“They’re basically the most advanced online eyewear provider out there. What you do is you upload three photos–one from straight on, two in profile–and then that photos get assigned to an AI, or, as they say, a ‘virtual stylist.’ Mine was named Jenny.”

“Wait, the AI stylist has a name?”

“Oh yeah, totally. There are 400 of them, and they each have a different personality and story. Jenny is really nice. She moved to the city from a small town in the mountains. But she’s always had a distinctive fashion sense. It often revealed itself when she quilted with her mother and four aunts.”

“But… she’s not real?”

“The story’s for personal connection, so you feel like you’re in good hands. Anyway, Jenny analyzes the photos and designs the perfect sunglasses for your face. Then the glasses get 3D-printed and sent to you. These ones were Jenny’s second try. Her first didn’t have lenses.”

“They forgot to add in lenses?”

“No, she designed them without even a place for lenses if you can believe it! It was just a plastic bar across my eyes. You know how it is with AI. They’re always learning! I sent those back and got these. It was kind of a pain in the ass, though, given they’re made at McMurdo.”

“The research base on Antarctica?”

“Yeah. The company has an agreement to use the 3D printer in the McMurdo lab. So, it can take a while to ship them out, and that’s if the researchers don’t have a bunch of other projects in the queue. But, hey, that’s how things are, right? Like, you can’t just go to a store and get some Ray-Bans. Too expensive! So, how about yours?”

“Oh, these? They’re Ray-Bans.”

“High roller!”

“Not really. 59 dollars.”

“What? That’s less than I paid for mine from A-Eye! And that’s not even factoring in my monthly contributions to Jenny’s Patreon.”

“You subscribe to an AI’s Patreon?”

“She’s an aspiring artist and I want to support that!”

So far today...

  • 75424 of you visited.
  • 43% on a phone, 3% on a tablet.
  • 4180 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 604 of these.
  • Deal ended .
  • That’s $38314 total.
  • (including shipping)

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