@haydesigner@troy It’s still 1/2 cup of fruit juice.
A half-cup of fruit juice is not the same thing as a half-cup of fruit. This thing has virtually no nutritional value apart from calories and vitamin C, but vitamin C is the easiest vitamin to get enough of.
There’s nothing wrong with candy. Let candy be candy.
Exactly this. The healthy part of fruit is in the pulp and solids. The juice contains calories without most of the good stuff and fiber.
Fruit juice is only mildly healthier than a light syrup.
Still, I don’t think anyone eats an iced lollypop for health, they do it because it’s fun and that’s OK as long as people don’t think this is “health food” rather than a snack.
@pmarin Pretty much. Which may be slightly less suspicious than HFCS, artificial flavor, and Red 40. After they get through processing it, how much of that juice could be proven to have been extracted from apples?
Listen. My preschooler has been gifted many fancy freezer pop molds in her short life, and she turns her nose up at the artisanal frozen fruit bars shaped like dinos and unicorns I lovingly create. Maybe these individually wrapped, brightly colored freezer pops will save me this summer. It’s worth $15 to try.
@mediocrebot Shortest otter has unnaturally long arm, one otter has orange head and blue body, another otter’s rifle stock appears to be poking inside the next otter’s elbow, yup, it’s AI all right.
@mediocrebot@werehatrack that’s really just the beginning. The ammo belt/cartridge, proper holding and aiming techniques, trigger discipline, that the right green one has two left hands, etc
Soldier #2 has a blue body but is red from the neck up. There’s an extra rifle being raised into the air by a disembodied red otter hand. “Otter Pops” are called for, but these are just cartoon otters.
There’s an otterly fantastic place waiting for you in otter space, so come with us in your ottermobile - there’s an ottermatic stick on the steering wheel.
Jonny Pops may be my first insta-buy on this carousel of “could I…?”. I’ve considered seeking a job there just for the new product internal test panels I wholeheartedly assume they run.
In for a bunch. I buy Flavo-pops to keep some at home, cause I likes 'em, and to give to the grands. One of the grands could take 'em or leave 'em, the other two are definite takers. However, the DIL isn’t a fan (the youngest grand leaves the sticky wrappers laying around.)
As far as the ingredients go, I’ve seen worse. Much worse.
I am very familiar with guar. The company I used to work for was a guar gum supplier. I’ve been to the company guar plant in Texas a few times as well, where guar beans imported from India were converted to guar flour.
We sold a small amount to the food industry, and some to the paper industry, but by far the most to the petroleum industry for use in drilling muds and in fracking owing to its amazing properties at being shear thinning (thixotropic), able to gel under the right conditions (temperature, pH) and breakdown when needed.
Guar as a food additive is tasteless, and a great thickener. Guar is effective at significantly lower concentrations than corn starch. It is a soluble dietary fiber, which doesn’t cause intestinal issues as a rule.
The box arrived, and despite having a layer of bagged Plano air all around it, FXG still managed to pop two of the johnnies. Rinsing off the rest and putting them in a different container was all that was required, but I suspect that i won’t be the only one who gets a soggy box.
The bagged Plano air on the bottom had been liberated; that part of the padding was also flaccid. And the bottom of the outer carton was sodden at one end. Overall, I think FXG was operating in full Partial Post mode for this run, and they only had to transit from Dallas to Houston. If you ordered some of these, check for dampness immediately upon deposition on your doorstep. You don’t want ants. (And let us be glad that Mediocrebot no longer triggers on that word.)
@werehatrack Just got mine, also had two popped (and a third that was leaking), but mine came in just a big plastic bag in a cardboard box, no padding or anything. Smelled like rotting fruit when I opened it. Genuinely surprised more didn’t pop with the dent FedEx left on one of the corners of the box.
@HuggableSquare@jeffnology@werehatrack
Plastic bag? Luxury. Mine was a loose 47, with that last one distributed on the two layers of cardboard and that sweet Plano bubble wrap. No wonder FedEx showed up so early this morning - the whole truck would’ve smelled of mixed berries.
@werehatrack I had a majority of mine pop open to the point that the secondary box they were in showed up on my doorstep soggy. Fed Ex guy looked thrilled to deliver a stinky wet box out of his truck.
QC report: Not sickeningly sweet, but the flavor of the “Cherry” pops is [slightly tart] APPLE with a hint of cherry. Not terrible, and I’m sure that the VDIL’s kiddo will like them well enough. I haven’t tried the mixed berry yet.
The mixed berry has a slightly less pronounced Apple overtone, but the berries are still a secondary note. Not bad, just probably not what somebody would expect based on the label.
@werehatrack the main ingredient is apple juice (I complained about this somewhere here) - it’s about as cheap as if you made your own with Wholesale Apple Juice and Kool-Aid
Had one popped as well for a soggy, mushy, stinky box. Does anyone notice some floaties in there though until you shake them up? That a normal part of the “they’re good because there’s fruit bits in there” experience?
I ordered two cases. They arrived today. One had two completely popped pops. The other had one leaking pop. Everything was quite soaked in delicious fruit juice.
I feel guilty after reading about all the soggy boxes, but ours were all intact and they taste so much better than the fluorescent sugar water ones. As hot as it is here, we need more!
Specs
Product: 48-Pack: Jonny Pops Large 4oz Freezer Pops (Cherry & Mixed Berry)
Model: 850028051474_850028051467
Condition: New
What’s Included?
Price Comparison
$46.95 at Food Service Direct
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Monday, Jul 14 - Tuesday, Jul 15
Grape, Lemonade, Pineapple, Green and even Orange are cool. Cherry is bottom of the shelf imo. Mixed berry is a mixed bag (lol)
@tysontomko Do you mean in general or have you had these specifically?
@tysontomko we just finished some from Costco and the cherry was lovely. It didn’t taste gross and artificial.
each pop contains a cup of fruit just like each line of cocaine contains a cup of vegetables
fucking lol
@thechinglish
Hmm. That’s right, poppy is vegan. All the more reason to eat bacon.
pro-tip:
airplane bottles of light rum or a good Blanco tequila work miracles with a couple of these things.
@alacrity Love this idea! The kids reach for the pops & the age-appropriate adults reach for the rum & then go to the freezer!
@alacrity In for 1!
@clutterbug started doing this with otter-pops back in the day & it works all too well.
I’ve also been banned for bringing in my own liquor to 7-11’s & mixing adult slurpees.
(lime slurpees make AWESOME margaritas)
MEALS! DEALS! EELS! AWESOME!
I am impressed that they were somehow able to cram 8 ounces into only 4 ounces
@haydesigner Yeah, I was in the process of modifying that. The site we were referencing had a character error and didn’t display the ½. Oops!
All good @troy, glad you caught it.
@haydesigner @troy It’s still 1/2 cup of fruit juice.
A half-cup of fruit juice is not the same thing as a half-cup of fruit. This thing has virtually no nutritional value apart from calories and vitamin C, but vitamin C is the easiest vitamin to get enough of.
There’s nothing wrong with candy. Let candy be candy.
@Limewater
Exactly this. The healthy part of fruit is in the pulp and solids. The juice contains calories without most of the good stuff and fiber.
Fruit juice is only mildly healthier than a light syrup.
Still, I don’t think anyone eats an iced lollypop for health, they do it because it’s fun and that’s OK as long as people don’t think this is “health food” rather than a snack.
Parents making a buying decision need some assurance (any source will do) that the product is “a healthy snack”.
oh hey it’s my 1000th meh button click (I don’t monitor those stats usually, I just happened to scroll down today)
/showme AWESOME!!!
WORKER BEES! HERCULES! TURKEY GREASE! AWESOME!
@agnesnutter Congratulations
!
If I’m reading the label correctly, these appear to be apple juice bars with a small amount of other fruits for flavor and color.
@pmarin Pretty much. Which may be slightly less suspicious than HFCS, artificial flavor, and Red 40. After they get through processing it, how much of that juice could be proven to have been extracted from apples?
@pmarin @werehatrack that’s why there’s water.
Though for right a gallon and a half of apple juice with flavoring and shipping, it’s not bad.
https://www.costco.com/kirkland-signature%2C-apple-juice%2C-128-fl-oz%2C-2-count.product.100334901.html
@pakopako @werehatrack Organic, even!
OMG memories. When my daughter was little we used to keep cases of this sort of thing in the freezer. It’s hot here and she loved them
/giphy childlike-undervalued-texture
Listen. My preschooler has been gifted many fancy freezer pop molds in her short life, and she turns her nose up at the artisanal frozen fruit bars shaped like dinos and unicorns I lovingly create. Maybe these individually wrapped, brightly colored freezer pops will save me this summer. It’s worth $15 to try.
From the people that brought you Johnny Cab!!
@yakkoTDI hahahahha I watched this the other night when I was on a date with insomnia.
What is guar gum?
Yeah, I know it’s made of Carbon.
@hchavers It is an extract from guar beans that is used as a thickener. Make sure you don’t confuse it with GWAR gum.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gwar#/media/File:Gwar_(Riot_Fest,_2014)_2.jpg
@hchavers @yakkoTDI
/giphy gwar
@sillyheathen Richmond VA approves
@hchavers aren’t we all made of carbon?
@hchavers @pmarin But mostly water.
@hchavers @macromeh @pmarin
I’m mostly hot air
@hchavers @macromeh @pmarin @pakopako
Maybe I’ll buy this and just give it to the church.
@AaronLeeJohnson the guy that started this company use to go to my church! Great guy!
The last time my Johnny popped and a freezer was involved my wife got pregnant.
Unlike “AI” Jonny Pops are a damn good treat.
@DrunkCat Since AI is not a food product that is not surprising. Neither is your lack of ability to win them back.
/giphy otter pops go to war!
/showme otter pops go to war!
@mediocrebot Shortest otter has unnaturally long arm, one otter has orange head and blue body, another otter’s rifle stock appears to be poking inside the next otter’s elbow, yup, it’s AI all right.
@mediocrebot @werehatrack that’s really just the beginning. The ammo belt/cartridge, proper holding and aiming techniques, trigger discipline, that the right green one has two left hands, etc
Soldier #2 has a blue body but is red from the neck up. There’s an extra rifle being raised into the air by a disembodied red otter hand. “Otter Pops” are called for, but these are just cartoon otters.
What a heap of slop.
It’s a horrible heatwave where I am. These would be perfect for today. Too bad Meh can’t deliver them instantly.
where otter pops?
@umbrellacorp Where, indeed?
There’s an otterly fantastic place waiting for you in otter space, so come with us in your ottermobile - there’s an ottermatic stick on the steering wheel.
@806D2701 I chuckled
Jonny Pops may be my first insta-buy on this carousel of “could I…?”. I’ve considered seeking a job there just for the new product internal test panels I wholeheartedly assume they run.
/buy
@capnjb It worked! Your order number is: voluptuous-towering-walnut
/showme voluptuous towering walnut
@mediocrebot Oh, thank God!
@capnjb @mediocrebot That’s a bodacious tree!
@capnjb @Kyeh @mediocrebot
It’s got my attention! It’s rather lovely… I stared at it longer than I think should have.
I’m glad they are finally including pictures with the ingredients on food items. Glad enough to buy it? meh’be, meh’be not
@werfy55 I noticed that too, and even high-resolution enough to read clearly. Clearly a sign of the coming Apocalypse.
Thank you for the hockey but you can keep your bacon and ice pops Canada
@JvB No Bacon??? Take off, you hoser!
/image SCTV Bob and Doug MacKenzie
@JvB @pmarin Dad! Bob broke your beer!
Three kids, extra friends and a pool. Yes. It is a no brainer.
I hope these taste better than the 12W USB-C Power Banks I bought last time.
@uncdave You need to plug them in first to get the proper taste.
In for a bunch. I buy Flavo-pops to keep some at home, cause I likes 'em, and to give to the grands. One of the grands could take 'em or leave 'em, the other two are definite takers. However, the DIL isn’t a fan (the youngest grand leaves the sticky wrappers laying around.)
As far as the ingredients go, I’ve seen worse. Much worse.
I am very familiar with guar. The company I used to work for was a guar gum supplier. I’ve been to the company guar plant in Texas a few times as well, where guar beans imported from India were converted to guar flour.
We sold a small amount to the food industry, and some to the paper industry, but by far the most to the petroleum industry for use in drilling muds and in fracking owing to its amazing properties at being shear thinning (thixotropic), able to gel under the right conditions (temperature, pH) and breakdown when needed.
Guar as a food additive is tasteless, and a great thickener. Guar is effective at significantly lower concentrations than corn starch. It is a soluble dietary fiber, which doesn’t cause intestinal issues as a rule.
Guar. It’s a good thing.
@Jackinga what are the chances of having a Guar expert already on the panel?
@Jackinga This was very interesting. Thanks!
/buy
@ironcheftoni It worked! Your order number is: ambiguous-maximum-rainstorm
/showme ambiguous maximum rainstorm
@mediocrebot now if I could only have rain like that at my house. Which is why I’m buying ice pops.
@ironcheftoni My roof would leak.
Can get 48 at Costco for $8 but they don’t have the mixed berry flavor and their only 1.4oz
@Star2236 Costco is 12¢/oz and these are 16¢/oz. It’s early for math and I may be wrong.
@mdiaz @Star2236 I guess it is early. You’re right about Costco, but the Johnny Pops here were about 7.8¢/oz.
@Limewater @Star2236 Too bad my job is almost entirely math. It’s gonna be a rough day.
The box arrived, and despite having a layer of bagged Plano air all around it, FXG still managed to pop two of the johnnies. Rinsing off the rest and putting them in a different container was all that was required, but I suspect that i won’t be the only one who gets a soggy box.
The flaccid pair was dead center on the bottom.
The bagged Plano air on the bottom had been liberated; that part of the padding was also flaccid. And the bottom of the outer carton was sodden at one end. Overall, I think FXG was operating in full Partial Post mode for this run, and they only had to transit from Dallas to Houston. If you ordered some of these, check for dampness immediately upon deposition on your doorstep. You don’t want ants. (And let us be glad that Mediocrebot no longer triggers on that word.)
@werehatrack They are trying to take the crown from Pitney Bowes.
@werehatrack Just got mine, also had two popped (and a third that was leaking), but mine came in just a big plastic bag in a cardboard box, no padding or anything. Smelled like rotting fruit when I opened it. Genuinely surprised more didn’t pop with the dent FedEx left on one of the corners of the box.
@HuggableSquare @werehatrack Same problem here. Mine didn’t have any padding or packaging. What were they thinking?
@HuggableSquare @jeffnology @werehatrack
Plastic bag? Luxury. Mine was a loose 47, with that last one distributed on the two layers of cardboard and that sweet Plano bubble wrap. No wonder FedEx showed up so early this morning - the whole truck would’ve smelled of mixed berries.
@werehatrack
Yep, same here. Sticky situation.
@werehatrack I had a majority of mine pop open to the point that the secondary box they were in showed up on my doorstep soggy. Fed Ex guy looked thrilled to deliver a stinky wet box out of his truck.
@actionjacksn04 @werehatrack Same complaint. We and sticky. Still cleaning it up…
@werehatrack lost 6 in shipping here, but after a quick rinse the rest look good!
QC report: Not sickeningly sweet, but the flavor of the “Cherry” pops is [slightly tart] APPLE with a hint of cherry. Not terrible, and I’m sure that the VDIL’s kiddo will like them well enough. I haven’t tried the mixed berry yet.
The mixed berry has a slightly less pronounced Apple overtone, but the berries are still a secondary note. Not bad, just probably not what somebody would expect based on the label.
@werehatrack the main ingredient is apple juice (I complained about this somewhere here) - it’s about as cheap as if you made your own with Wholesale Apple Juice and Kool-Aid
Had one popped as well for a soggy, mushy, stinky box. Does anyone notice some floaties in there though until you shake them up? That a normal part of the “they’re good because there’s fruit bits in there” experience?
@TehMaliron Yes, and yes, IMO.
@TehMaliron maybe ask CS just to be sure?
One popped in my shipment received today. Threw them all in a bucket, rinsed, transferred to a clean box.
I ordered two cases. They arrived today. One had two completely popped pops. The other had one leaking pop. Everything was quite soaked in delicious fruit juice.
They came today! Yay!
A dozen had popped and the box was soaked in sticky juice. Meh.
@Curllyq I guess we know why they ended up on Meh.
Still waiting for my package.
I feel guilty after reading about all the soggy boxes, but ours were all intact and they taste so much better than the fluorescent sugar water ones. As hot as it is here, we need more!
@charlfort You’re always welcome to post an Unblame on the Goat thread, of course. (If this seems like nonsense, there are explanations around.)