mPULSE Blast and Blast Mini Bluetooth Stereo Speakers (Open Box)

  • You’re looking at Bluetooth speakers that wrap around your device, not your head
  • They’re in “open box” condition – mostly they’re from stores that tried to sell them and didn’t
  • Get a large one for your tablet or phablet, or a small one for your smaller-sized phone. If in doubt, get the big one.
  • “Transform any smartphone into a cinema on the go” is like saying a toothpick will “turn any food into an authentic Indonesian satay”
  • They sound better than your devices built-in speakers; the big version sounds much better
  • Adjust your device 20 to 60 degrees (relative to something) for maximum cinematic thrills
  • Model: MWKBLTHBLSTRD, MWKBLTHBLSTBK, MWKBLTHBLSTWT, MWKBLTHBLSMRD, MWKBLTHBLSMWT, MWKBLTHBLSMBK (All right, we get it, mPULSE. You’re regular readers of our popular model reviews, you disagree with our criticism of model numbers that use too many hyphens, and you created some truly abhorrent, hyphen-free model numbers to prove a point. Good job.)
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mPULSE conTROL

We promised the higher-ups we’d describe today’s product in some depth and not spend the entire writeup comparing this Bluetooth speaker system to the headwear of mute Empire Strikes Back character Lobot. They don’t even go on your head but rather around your phone or tablet and double as a stand, but man oh man if you did put them on your head…

Lobot Town, U.S.A.

There’s a lot to cover with this product. Most importantly, we’re selling them in open box condition, which, if you’re not a scholar of retail, means the box they come in was (possibly) opened at some point. A lot of them were retail “shelf pulls” where a store tried to sell them, couldn’t, and sent them back to the manufacturer. So they might have price stickers, “return to vendor” stickers, or other unexpected stuff on the box, but they work just fine.

Our fingers were itching to make Lobot jokes throughout that paragraph, but we refrained. Stalwart minions and the service of our retail masters, we. Just like Lobot, whom these speakers would make you look like if you put them on your head.

Do these sound that much better than your device’s built-in speakers? Yes. Any speakers larger than your phone’s speakers will sound better, and these are larger. So large they could —

Nope, not going to do it. We instinctually began to hypothesize that these speakers could transmit messages meant to overthrow tyrannical rule of a peaceful cloud city, but we imagined the bosses’ voice in our ear imploring us to stay on topic (or “on target”) so we chose to leave out any reference to Lobot, his headgear, or any similarities between that headgear and the product we are selling today.

So, if you’re willing to buy a product that was possibly at some point opened, you can get a heckuva deal on these little speakers. If you’re averse to such dark alleyways of the online retail universe, sit this one out. And if you were looking for jocular references to Lobot in this writeup, we apologize for letting you down.

So far today...

  • 68110 of you visited.
  • 38% on a phone, 6% on a tablet.
  • 5318 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 1200 of these.
  • Deal ended .
  • That’s $14069 total.
  • (including shipping)

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