Maybe Too Cheap?

Here’s the paradox of selling discounted wares: there’s a point where things get almost too cheap to sell.

Take this bartender’s kit, for example. It’s neat! Neat enough for Amazon to sell at about 20 bucks. If we were to offer it for 90% of Amazon’s price, it wouldn’t move the needle. 75% of the Amazon price, you’d think about it but probably pass. 50% off, though? Now we’re talking! That’s cheap! Literally half-price! Hubba hubba!

But then, the price goes under that 50% markdown, and you start to get suspicious. Like, what are you not understanding about this thing? What annoying feature are you missing that renders it unusable? Does it, in some unseeable way, suck beyond your wildest dreams? Because, otherwise, why such a deal? There’s gotta be some catch, right?

That’s what we mean by “too cheap to sell.”

What we have going for us, though, is this space: the write-up in which we honestly dissect the product for sale. And so, today, we just want to make sure you understand that this bartender kit? It’s completely, totally, utterly just fine. Is it state-of-the-art? No. But it is good enough to competently whip up some cocktails.

And that’s all that really counts, isn’t it?

Now, the hard part is deciding on the cocktail to make. After all, we find ourselves in a transitional period, seasonally speaking; it’s neither the time for a bright and light summer cocktail nor a warm and hearty winter cocktail. So then, what should you make?

Something with real late-September vibes. Like:

• a Harvest Wallbanger
• a mar-gourd-rita
• a negronly-3-more-months-until-Christmas
• a cide-car
• a cosmo-fall-itan
• a sex on the beach (but pack blankets)
• a B-52 degree morning
• a French 75-degree afternoon
• a cuba leafre
• a migration (get it? It’s an aviation, but in fall!)

Stupid? Yes. But also… brilliant? No, not really.

Anyway, buy yourself a bartender kit. It’s pretty good and really cheap.