Malibu Skye Signature Print Satchel with Wallet

  • A classy-looking satchel
  • A matching classy-looking wallet
  • At this price, you’ll have plenty of money left over to put in the wallet
  • Potential ad slogan: “A wallet? And a medium sized bag? It’s a satch made in heaven!”
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Get A Brand New Bag

Today we have a 2-piece satchel set. You get a medium-sized top-zipper satchel and a wallet.

This same set was, apparently, $148 at one point. Now, with items like this, it isn’t uncommon for the manufacturer’s website to inflate the price a little to give the impression of luxury. Still, it obviously wasn’t supposed to be available for $29.99, and might never be again.

But what’s the selling point for a wallet-and-satchel set other than the stupidly low price we’re offering it for? Well, that’s pretty much it. It’s cheap, so if you like the style, you should buy it.

Simple enough, right?

But then we started thinking: it’s getting to be summer. Which made us think: summer blockbusters are on the way. Which made us think: this would be the perfect bag for the age-old tradition of buying candy for cheap at the grocery store and sneaking it into the movie theater.

Only, it’s 2023. Half the movie theaters out there have bars in them now. So, wouldn’t it follow that what we should be sneaking into movie theaters isn’t candy at all but rather a flask filled with a stiff drink? Or, even better, why not both? And we don’t mean some candy and some booze. We mean some boozy candy, such as:

  • a Mars-garita Bar-garita
  • a Milky IPwAy
  • Hot Toddy-males
  • a Guinesstle Crunch Bar
  • Whiskey Sour Patch Kids
  • Rumnts
  • Milk (Stout) Duds
  • a 3 Musket-beers Bar
  • a Junior Mint Julep
  • Take 5… shots of cheap gin

Okay, fine. These puns are really stupid. But look, what are we supposed to say here? This bag is a bag. The wallet is a wallet. The price is right. So if you want them, buy them.

So far today...

  • 62208 of you visited.
  • 55% on a phone, 2% on a tablet.
  • 2839 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 138 of these.
  • Sold out at 11:20am ET
  • That’s $4695 total.
  • (including shipping)

Who's buying this crap?

Which items are you buying?