Lovesac Sactionals for Kids & Pets

  • Using magnets and velcro, your kids can build their own little couches and stuff.
  • We’ve been hesitant to mention it, but your dog’s loft could use some new furniture.
  • Machine-washable covers make for easy cleanup.
  • This time, it’s just the berry color.
  • You get one seat or one side, or, IDK, you could buy a few of each?!
  • If you like other things that make use of fabric, don’t forget to check out Mediocritee!
  • Model: C30CCPAXR, C30CCQAXR. I’m embarrassed about how long I stared at those, looking for a difference.
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The Small Things

An excerpt from The Wolf Pup of Wall Street by Arnie Helpin, age 9:

I was lounging on some the Lovesac Sactionals that I’d arranged in my open-concept penthouse apartment, listening to classic rock recorded as long ago as 1999, when a sound drew me to the window. It sounded like a scream, but I could not make out whether it conveyed desperation or anger. It would not be the first time rival investors took to the street below to curse my name or beg for mercy, but this sounded different, and as soon as I looked out I understood why.

The scream had come from the park across the street. School was out and the other children my age were playing on the various swing sets and slides assembled there. So the scream was neither of terror or anger. It was of glee.

My first thought was to pity these young imbeciles for their lack of ambition. They’d go to the park or to the mall while I hatched plans for my ascension. It all began one day when I sold a Snickers bar to a wealthy classmate named Ronny Tinsdale for ten dollars when he was particularly hungry during homeroom. I used this money to buy a thirty-pack of rubber snakes. I then placed these snakes in corners throughout the school and waited nearby until someone inevitably cried out in terror upon discovering one. So fearful were they that they never thought to check the snake’s validity themselves, especially not when I was there, immediately, offering secure snake removal for just two dollars. My fortune grew and grew until eventually the stock market beckoned.

In other words, while my peers toiled at Build-a-Bear, I was playing Build-an-Empire.

And yet, for all my success, I could not help feeling envious as I watched them play in the park that day. Sure, I had enough crisp hundreds in my wallet to bribe my way unescorted into every PG-13 movie that happened to be playing in the entire city, even those rated as such due to “adult situations.” And sure, I could spend long days in the kiddy pool, eating my black truffle Lunchables, enjoying a Capris Sun martini, calling out commands to my interns who adjusted the enormous IRL Candy Crush board, the heavy stainless steel pieces of which I’d commissioned from the artist Jeff Koons.

But did I truly feel happy?

This was what I contemplated as I sat back down. I had given my nearly decade-long life over to the next big money making move when perhaps I should’ve been attending to, as the classic rock song’s lyrics now posited, “All The Small Things.” Just this possibility filled me with a sense of defeat as alien to me as it was painful. But at least, thanks to my Lovesac Sactionals, I was comfortable.

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