You're Nobody 'Til Some Subreddit Loves You

Think of something. Something you do, or something you eat, or something you like, or something you hate, or something you watched once a long time ago, or some city you’ve never been to. Chances are there’s a Subreddit dedicated to it. If you don’t know what a subreddit is, a) congratulations on having more of an offline life than we do, and b) it’s a subsection of the still-mighty link-sharing site Reddit, and c), they’re usually referred to by the stub of their URL, like /r/whateverthesubredditisabout.

Like, take this Food Saver vacuum sealer. It’s a pretty good version of what it does, which is vacuum-seal food, fabric, documents, tools, and anything else you might want to keep from the ravages of time, air, and moisture. What more is there to say? What else could there be to talk about with a vacuum sealer?

You could start by asking /r/vacuumseal. If you’re planning to use this Food Saver sealer for sous vide cooking, you’d be better off starting with /r/sousvide, or maybe ask in /r/askculinary.

So far, so typical. But if you’re hoping that your vac-packed vittles will see you through the fall of humanity, you’re sure to find somebody in /r/preppers who’s way further gone than you are. If it’s really urgent, skip right to this thread in /r/bugout. We won’t be laughing when the SHTF!

Less apocalyptically, you can find out about vacuum-sealing your yarn at this /r/knitting conversation, your bath bombs at this /r/LushCosmetics thread, and your marijuana at this discussion in /r/marijuana.

Saving your baby’s too-small cloth diapers for the next baby? According to someone in /r/ClothDiaps says vacuum-seal them. Hoping to pass your crappy '80s comics down to your great-great-grandchildren? Vacuum-seal them up like they do on /r/comicbooks.

By now you’re probably thinking “Oh yeah? Well, what if I want to surprise my friends with a truly disgusting stunt involving swallowing a sealed sheet of LSD and, uh, revealing it in a particularly memorable way? I bet no Subreddit has any advice for THAT!” Obviously, you haven’t spent much time at threads like this one in /r/Drugs.

Suddenly we feel like we’ve spent too much time there. We’ve gone too far. We’ve seen too much. It’s time to turn back. The last thing we want to say is, the most popular post we’ve ever seen on Reddit about this vacuum sealer was this post on /r/funny. Now that Subreddit has great taste in writing.