Fondoodler
- It’s a hot glue gun for cheese
- Load it up with pretty much any kind of cheese and splorch away
- In our tests, Velveeta got too liquidy to work very well, so we recommend just using real cheese
- Contrary to the repeated protestations of the Cheetos mascot, being cheesy turns out to be very easy indeed
- The perfect implement for writing entries in your dairy
- Model: Fond 1 as in: “if you can Fond 1 for less, buy it”
It'll Stop The World and Melt With You
Once an epoch, a technology arrives that makes it impossible to imagine life before it.
Just as civilization once came to be defined by the wheel, or the internal combustion engine, or the microprocessor, now we stand at the dawning of a new period of human history, separate and distinct from any that have gone before. Behold the age of the Fondoodler.
The Fondoodler: a hot glue gun, but for cheese. A scientific breakthrough to transform the way we live, the way we think, and the way we put cheese on stuff. How radically will the Fondoodler reshape human civilization? At this early stage, it’s impossible to know, or to overestimate. The economy will be transformed, of course. Will family structures be remade? Will new forms of literature emerge, written in mozzarella? Will there still be crime and war in a post-Fondoodler world?
They’re going to build cities around this technology, mark our words.
Here is our first encounter with the Fondoodler, recorded for posterity. We tried to make a crackers-and-cheese house with it.
P.S.