10-Pack: Powrtabs Emergency Chargers

  • It’s another STOCKING STUFFER SATURDAY, woo, awesome, hooray, great news
  • Single-use backup juice, these are like the Keurig Cups of external battery power
  • Keep in your backpack while traveling, or in a body cavity if you travel to rough places
  • Advertised shelf life of five years, which is ten times that of pickled eggs
  • Model: POW-IPH-1PA (solid model number, achieves balance without perfect symmetry)
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It's The Thought

“It’s the thought that counts,” people say, trying to put a positive spin on a crummy gift. But in the stocking-stuffer category, it’s totally true. Because the thought is pretty much all that’s there.

The stocking is where you put those little presents you accumulated over the course of the year when you were at a state park gift shop, or garage sale, or international grocery store, and you saw something that made you think of someone in your family (or other intimate circle of mutual devotion). It’s cutesy stuff. Trinkets. Nothing big. No gift that comes out of your loved one’s stocking is going to knock him out of the ones he’s wearing.

At the surface level, stocking gifts say something small, like “I know you like coffee,” or “this ornament looked like your old dog to me,” or “I thought you could put this sticker on your kayak.” But underneath, they’re saying something big: “All year long, because I care about you, there was no flea market stall, filling station convenience store, or box of sales convention promotional swag in which I could not find what Naked Eyes called ‘something there to remind me.’”

No one’s gonna go nuts over Powrtabs on Christmas morning. They’re fine. They’re pretty useful, in fact. Stick a couple in your glove box, purse, tackle box, whatever, as a safeguard against finding yourself with a powered-down phone in an emergency. They’re single-use only, unlike rechargeable powerbanks; but also unlike powerbanks they hold a charge for a long time. Like, years. So they’re handy. But, yeah, not what anyone’s going to list first when a friend asks “what’d you get for Christmas?”

Later on, though, after the frenzy of Christmas morning has subsided, when the person to whom you gave Powrtabs is having a quiet moment alone, maybe logy and sentimental with nog, he or she will come to understand the thought behind this stocking stuffer:

“I love you enough to regularly worry about the possibility you could end up frozen to death in your stalled car, or similar.”

And that’s the thought that counts.

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