poll question for totally legit purposes
12totally legit scientific(ish) purposes. totally.
I am ______-handed. when I use a knife and fork, I hold the knife in my ______ hand to cut my food.
a) right, right
b) right, left
c) left, left
d) left, right
at some point in life, I’ll gather the data and do something with it.
(insert obligatory fuck here)
- 51 comments, 49 replies
- Comment
A.
@heartny Fuck a bee, you get stung!
a
B&D (I’m a little ambidextrous)
@therealjrn now that is talent!
@therealjrn but do you have a preference? or one combo you use more than the other?
Fascinating. Thank you, @therealjm, for your answer. I’m going to use it also.
B&D is the only thing that makes sense. I’m entirely ambidextrous. That probably explains many things…or not. I catch things equally well with either hand (for example). Interesting question. I’ll have to come back and see what @carl669 makes of it all.
@carl669 I probably favor my left hand, but I play most (all maybe?) sports right-handed.
E. I eat with my teeth alone, no utensils of any kind.
KuoH
In polite company : A
Alone : no knife or fork like a barbarian
@LordSalem
No other freedom compares to grabbing a turkey drumstick and chomping into out like Genghis fucking Khan.
A.
But if you had asked about the fork, I alternate between US style (right) and European style(left). But always left on an airplane or other cramped spots.
c) left, left
D
B
(a)aaaargh!
D
A
Depends on the food if it’s gonna be a challenge to cut:
A
If its easy to cut then B
A eh
Mostly C, but I’ll go back and forth depending on whether the cutting or the holding still while cutting is the important part of the procedure.
I would be an A, yes, but I keep the fork in my left hand to eat, as opposed to the 'mercan way of making many cuts and then switching the fork to the right hand to deliver the food.
Just to complicate things, a lot (most) of the food I prepare does not require cutting with a knife, in which case it’s all fork on the right.
I know, more data than asked for, but seems relevant to which hand has the knife.
A
Fucking A all the way.
But I’m not holding my breath for the eventual reveal. Still waiting for the thing from @moose involving song titles and some other shit from 2 (?) years ago.
/giphy fucking A
@llangley but i’m not a mediocre employee, so i’m much more productive. so, expect a reveal in half of @moose’s time.
@llangley Judging by the document on my computer that hasn’t been touched since, it was barely over a year ago, but it feels like 2. It’s definitely never happening now though so I may as well say it was going to be a Royal Rumble using the same generator that made the Mediocre Hunger Games, but it was an absolute pain in the neck to add each possible event (
(player1) bodyslams (player2) and the crowd goes nuts!) one at a time so I gave up and then the website erased all progress I had made. The game’s first stage is a “bloodbath” that I was going to repurpose for intros using the songs that people submitted (“McGruff the Crime Dog enters the arena to My Favorite Things by Julie Andrews”).Worst part was I had used a markov generator to make up a bunch of wrestling finisher moves that I never got to share until now. Tough to pick my favorite between Trailer Crack Widow and Dr Smoothe’s Secret Chin Music.
@llangley @Moose I’d like to write a cold war era spy novel titled “The Queen’s Crossbow.”
@llangley @Moose @stolicat I call dibs on the historical romance title “West Of Fate” that @f00l is going to write for us.
@Moose thanks for clarifying, would have been interesting indeed! I can’t seem to shake the image of the “pumphanding frog bite” but I think I was thinking of “hand pumping”?
@therealjrn
Proofread, please!
The correct title of my as yet unwritten Regency-cyberpunk-zombie-sparklyvampire-damagedsuperhero-western-romance series is:
Belatedly West Of Overdue Procrastinated Fate
/giphy procrastinated fate
Usually A.
Unless I’m trying to read while eating then I’ll cut a few bites and switch my fork to the right.
Fork is sometimes facing upwards and sometimes it’s upside down.
Usually B, usually subconscious, but it can happen that any utensil is in any hand at any time. I’m an ambidextrous eater, though I am primarily right handed.
A
A
Totally legit. A.
Eh?
/image A
A if I’m really cutting on a thing.
Otherwise, I just kinda do whatever. Fork an entire chunk of meat and use teeth, cut left-handed, try to fold the thing instead of cutting, cut using a fork or spoon.
Once in a while I try to use a butter knife as a kind of flat spoon / single-tined fork.
@InnocuousFarmer
“I eat my peas with honey, I’ve done it all my life; It makes the peas taste funny, But it keeps them on the knife.”
D
A.
IIRC, as a kid we were taught that proper table manners were to cut with the right hand and then place the knife on the table and switch the fork to the right hand.
Fuck that.
/giphy A
A.
I usually use my right hand for the fork, but when I’m cutting something, the fork stays in my left hand. I DON’T cut a piece, set down the knife, then switch the fork to my right hand like I’ve seen some uncouth folks do.
@medz Don’t call people uncouth just because you lack patience and dexterity when presented with food. Probably got your elbows on the table too
@Moose it takes more dexterity to use the fork in the non-dominant hand to bring the cut food to your mouth. Setting the knife down and switching the fork over the the dominant hand is cheating. Apparently, according to the first search result, I eat like a European…
“I’m @medz! I like to recklessly endanger my face when I eat! Also I hate america and spit on the founding fathers!”
I wonder if the queen is a zig-zager or not…
Edit: I have found sources with no attribution that claim she forks with the left hand, but the fork is upside down and food goes on top instead of stabbed(?!), but I have found zero photographic evidence of this and in fact have found several photos where royals are using forks right-side up.
@Moose Face is never in any danger as the knife tip never approaches the face.
See 2nd example (“Continental Method”) in this vid around the 7:17 mark
And, yes, I always make that face at 8:09 after taking a bite.
@medz is a fork not just many small knife tips in proximity?
@Moose hardly
@Moose
The palace supposedly goes to great lengths to make sure that the Royal family
)
(+/- the Sussex branch
are not photographed at the dinner table.
@medz @Moose also demonstrated in that video is that by not switching, you can use the knife to pile more stuff on the fork, and slop a little
gravysauce on there, too, all in one set of motions.@medz @Moose And I think it’s important to always have your knife in your dominant hand in case the dinner conversation gets a little heated …
@medz @Moose @stolicat What you like raw meat for dinner too? :snicker:
A. I will switch the fork to match whatever hand the person sitting next to me is using to avoid bumping elbows.
C
A/B, I guess. Mostly keep the fork in left hand if I’m knifing. But fork in right hand if I’m not, most of the time.
The next poll should be how people hold the fork.
@djslack That seems logical. I’m a little surprised that @carl669 has not done a forking poll yet.
@carl669 @djslack @therealjrn Agree. There is a whole lot of forking around on this thread.
We need to hear from the professional forkers.
And I’m ignoring all you one-handed forkers. Clearly that is not the proper way to fork. You know who you are.
/giphy forking around
@djslack @mike808 @therealjrn patience young grasshoppers. the forking is yet to come.
@carl669 @djslack @mike808 @therealjrn Maybe you should all just fork off.
@djslack @mike808 @moonhat @therealjrn
fork you, you forking forker!
@carl669 @djslack @mike808 @therealjrn Hmm, I would have expected a The Good Place gif, but at least giphy got the network right.
@djslack @mike808 @mossygreen @therealjrn
I like that show
@carl669 @djslack @mossygreen @therealjrn
The Good Place can get forked.
The Grinder was a far, far better show.
@carl669 @djslack @mike808 @therealjrn And Newsradio was quite possibly the best sitcom of the '90’s, but nobody watched it and then Phil Hartman was murdered by his wife. I guess what I’m saying is, I’m not sure what the connection is between The Good Place and The Grinder, and also that I wish someone was broadcasting Newsradio.
@carl669 @djslack @mossygreen @therealjrn
I think they both launched at the same time, and TGP got renewed and Grinder didn’t, despite being a far, far better show, in premise, writing, and acting. Fred Savage and Rob Lowe doing a meta comedy wins over Ted Dansen warming over his likeable handsome white guy shtick from Cheers yet again after CSI:Cyber tanked.
@mike808
Can you clarify your position? Do you actually think that The Good Place is a bad show? Or do you hate it primarily because The Grinder was so much better but got cancelled?
It looks to me like The Good Place premiered after The Grinder was cancelled (Sept. 2016 vs May 2016).
@carl669 @djslack @mike808 @therealjrn You now, I just read a whole interview with Mike Schur about getting Timothy Olyphant to cameo on last night’s episode in which he talked about how funny Olyphant was in a role on The Grinder, and I was like, oh, mike808 was making a clever joke about the most recent episode, maybe. And apparently you weren’t, but I kind of think you were. You get the credit.
@carl669 @djslack @mossygreen @therealjrn
TGP is just a bland show. It premiered in the timeslot The Grinder was in. And yes, any promos for TGP remind me just how sad it is for what passes for a “successful” show these days. And yes, the promos airing fir the Tim Olyphant cameo on TGP reminded me yet again just how much better The Grinder was than TGP.
@djslack @mossygreen @therealjrn
@mike808 - so, what i’m hearing you say is, you like The Grinder slightly more than TGP
B
When I use a fork alone, I hold it in the right hand, so why should I change hands just because I also have a knife?
C
I say C, see…
/giphy B
I’m also semi-ambidextrous. Makes it important to choose a seat accordingly in public so I’m not bumping elbows…
Of the 38 responses I counted (I think I disregarded two respondents), 21% reported being left handed. Wikipedia says it’s estimated 10% of the global population is left handed. This could suggest that the Meh forums attract more left handers than the average internet forum (or that they repel right handers).
/giphy useful data idea
@eonfifty or more left handers choose to answer or left handers are more broke than right handers and so more of them have to shop here
@eonfifty @Kidsandliz clearly we’re not all right
@ybmuG
/image bah dum tiss
@eonfifty @ybmuG
but you’re not all wrong either
As a lefty who was forced briefly to write right-handed, it’s d but if I’m sitting at a table where my right is blocked by a person I’ll just switch. One’s a bit more comfortable but the other is fine. Yay for switch hitters!
A, usually, but sometimes I don’t switch hands, if it’s an easy thing to cut. But that’s only after I learned how they don’t switch in Europe, and it’s more of a struggle to do it that way than to switch hands.
D.
I am left-handed but I was thought to do many things by right-handed people. I never switch my utensils while eating. I may switch while cooking but that’s about it.
Why are people yucking it up who never bothered to answer the poll question? WTF, there’s definitely something wrong with those people.
Fuckin’ A.
It would be cool if we had the ability to make actual polling topics, with the little radio buttons and totals and all. Obviously, a potential feature for abuse for trolls, but maybe it could be done in coordination with the volmods or something?
I think this whilst looking at the regular Meh poll - there are always many more responses to the poll options than comments posted. Home-brew polls like this one and the lottery one that just popped up require an actual posted response, which limits the responses to those willing to (or knowing how to, or even caring to know how to) post.
I think the regular Meh poll has much better representation of the (mostly silent) Meh majority.
@stolicat
I think that is an awesome idea. And in order to limit abuse, make it so only former goats can create them.
/giphy former goats only
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!
@mediocrebot
/youtube EVERYTHING IS AWESOME
KRULL! A SKULL! BRETT HULL! AWESOME!
@stolicat @therealjrn @eonfifty
horrible idea. meh will steal your poll question and profit from them!
original poll question:
https://meh.com/forum/topics/stupid-poll-question-thats-stupid
stolen poll question:
https://meh.com/forum/topics/one-ice-cube-left-in-the-tray-and-it-refuses-to-come-out--do-you
i’m still waiting for my poll writing check.
@carl669 @eonfifty @stolicat @therealjrn
/giphy fuck poll questions
@carl669 @stolicat @therealjrn
/giphy I can’t even
/giphy Fuckin’ A
A …
I’m one of those… ambi… thingies.
thanks for all the responses so far folks. one day I’ll get some to actually doing something with them.