Less spending for 31 days
21Somehow, getting both an IRK and a BOC w/in 3 days of each other made me think… “Why am I buying all this junk? Why am I buying so much stuff in general?!”
To make a long story shorter…I’ve decided to take a 31-day breather on my spending. Sure, I still have to eat, and will buy stuff if I need to. But…no gratuitous spending. Going out to eat only if I’m with friends. Etc. Anything I “want but don’t need” will go on the ol’ Amazon wishlist, and I’ll take a harder look at it in late August.
Already this is kind of refreshing. I’ve put a rubber band around my credit card, as a kind of reminder that I should pause before spending. Now I breathe in the sweet summer air, fed solely by the dew of morning, heart lifted naught but by the innocent smile of a child.
So…this is kind of an un-Meh topic…but do any of you have inspiring stories about putting your consumerism on pause? Or, ever get fed up with buying stuff you don’t actually want?
- 16 comments, 68 replies
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About a year ago I started actually following a budget and using a budgeting app. It has made all the difference and I no longer stress about money as much.
Fyi I use YNAB ( Stands for You Need A Budget)
@CaptAmehrican yeah, I tried YNAB for a while, but it didn’t work very well with my bank. (At all, really.)
So… I’m going to try doing a “flexible but low-spending” month and see how it goes. I’ll be more strict in the following 30 days if this interval is a failure.
@CaptAmehrican Another star for YNAB. I’m still on the “classic” version 4. It’s a real eye opener to your finances. It should be taught in high school.
The “secret sauce” is to get you to think about where you want your income to go instead of tracking where you already spent it.
@mike808 having the app on my phone so i can look at my budget and record right as j consider and make a purchase has been key for me.
For example my irk and boc were both out of random fun money category. (Both were mostly junk)
/giphy “this is good”
Real good.
/buy
@therealjrn Sorry, I’m not sure what you’re trying to buy. Make sure you’re posting in today’s deal topic.
@mediocrebot @therealjrn
Fuck you, @mediocrebot
@carl669
@therealjrn smart ass
@Kidsandliz @therealjrn Who’s the real fucking smartass around here??
@carl669
@carl669 @mediocrebot
Had no choice but to put consumerism on pause due to circumstances beyond my control. Some ways I found that help me keep on track were:
don’t go into stores or browse online sites unless I needed something (meh is an exception as I seldom buy unless it is for christmas or birthdays for others since prices tend to be lower than I’d otherwise have to pay for something). This reduces the “I wants”. If I don’t see it I don’t usually want it. Since meh mostly sells things I don’t want that makes it easier too.
Budget $5 a week to “waste” with no guilt. Waste is defined, at my budget level, as: ice cream, chocolate, eating out, the one lottery ticket I bought when I was out of state at a doctor apt earlier this week, Dairy Queen ice cream cone, trying to get an IRK… when it’s gone it is gone. If I don’t spend it all one week I can roll it over, but I can’t borrow against the future.
Pay cash as research has documented that we spend less when we pay in cash rather than pay with a debit card or a credit card.
Instead of worrying about hanging on to receipts I put X amount of cash in my wallet each month where money for different categories of things have different colored paper clips on them (the amount determined by the budget). This gives me a visual on how fast the money is vanishing and helps me slow spending if need be. Ideally I’d deal with hanging on to receipts to have an exact accounting daily but that would drive me insane so I do this instead.
I budget, making sure I save some money as a higher priority than satisfying an “I want”. I also make sure, when I have enough income over subsistence level living, to add to retirement accounts.
When I make more money than I expected I don’t change my spending, that money gets channeled into savings and retirement. A small amount gets put aside into a “mental” I want spending fund.
I use an excel spreadsheet to keep track of things.
It used to be if I planed to window shop - for example I went to IKEA when I was out of town (none in this state) - I’d empty my wallet of all other money and credit cards so that if I was too tempted I’d have to go to the car to get this stuff and thus that gave me time to re-think that spending. Now giving myself time to re-think a purchase is a habit (I started doing this when I got cancer #1 and that was long enough ago that this is pretty well engrained at this point) and so I don’t need to separate myself from my money to take a time out when thinking about buying something that isn’t a need.
Early on in this process making sure I’d also record how much money I had overall each month.Watching it grow as I saved served as positive reinforcement for making wiser choices.
What I found when I first started this (and at that point in time I had a professional job so by all measures had excess funds) is that most of the cut backs I made were not painful after I changed my thinking about how I was spending and what my priorities were. Living well below my means had its own rewards.
The other thing I tried to focus on was experiences instead of things. Again research has documented that we are more satisfied and happier, and satisfied and happier for a longer period of time, with experiences and the memories from those rather than from buying most stuff. So instead of framing what I was doing as making a choice to “do without”, I framed it as changing what I was doing to get more “happiness” and “satisfaction”. I’d substituted having more “experiences” (many free or cheap) to increase my happiness level rather than buying more stuff. If I was tempted to buy a want, I’d purposely think of something I could do, preferably free, that would be fun.
Over time all this became a habit and so I don’t really have to think about these kinds of things very often as I am on auto pilot most of the time.
Obviously nothing much is going to save you if your basic needs can’t be cut any closer to the bone and expenses are still higher than your income. But that is a whole different problem.
And, of course a money copy machine would also be nice
@Kidsandliz You budget the way YNAB does. Its an envelope system. With and app for tracking receipts as you spend. It takes your colored paper clips virtual and you don’t have to keep cash around.
@Kidsandliz This is a great summary, and there are a lot of cool ideas in there. I like the idea of going “shopping” without any actual money in your pocket. Then you can enjoy the ride of browsing things, while knowing that you’re not going to buy anything.
I sort of do that with my Amazon wish list. Things that aren’t necessities go on the wish list. And if they stay there for long enough, maybe I’ve gave them enough thought that I’d actually enjoy them. Often I delete stuff, though, after a few weeks or months of looking at it and the excitement wears off.
I like the idea of mostly using cash, too…although I have to say I’m not crazy about the idea of walking around with more than the $40 I usually have on hand. And in Seattle that doesn’t get me too far some days. I dunno. I’ll give it some thought. For now I have my “rubber band on the CC” idea. It has a date on it: August 25. That’s the date I get to re-evaluate my spending and see how I’m doing. Hopefully it will make me more thoughtful about pulling it out.
Hmmmm…your idea about the money copy machine is intriguing! Gotta get to work on that. Maybe Meh will sell one!
@Kidsandliz @UncleVinny These are a great set of ideas, and @Kidsandliz has worked out a very thorough plan that deals with both financial parameters as well as psychological ones. It’s similar to what I started a few years back during a financial crisis that caused me to live on a very limited income for a couple years. Habits picked up then have persisted, and the positive feedback of watching your available balance grow helps a lot.
Only thing I would add is to use your spreadsheet to extend out into the future at least six months to a year, using past data on bills, payments, household costs, etc. to construct a base monthly budget - This shows you how well you’re structuring your spending for the long run, and also let’s you see the ripple effect larger purchases, higher credit payments, or heavy spending periods (holidays, vacations) will have down the road.
@Kidsandliz You bought a lottery ticket at the doctor’s? I don’t know if I’d trust a doctor who sold lottery tickets.
/giphy doctor Nick riviera
@UncleVinny I started with an advantage though. I grew up in a family that didn’t have much and so metaphorically speaking a “depression mentality” was very much present in my life and has left its mark. Except once when I had to buy a transmission for my car, I have always paid my credit card off in full every month (and right now it rarely has any charges on it as I can’t afford much).
For me the entire spending issue is more a psychological one than anything else. For example, I have a great deal of anxiety if I don’t have at least something saved and that effectively puts the brakes, most of the time, on discretionary spending beyond the $5/week junk budget (my junk budget was higher when I made more money). That $20/mo helps me not feel totally deprived. I think that is important - not feeling deprived as feeling deprived can drive spending.
Thinking about having a junk budget amount that is reasonable for your income, budget and goals, might help also with the guilt that comes when you do spend on something you tried to talk yourself out of and bought it anyway. Prior to the junk budget I did make far more impulse purchases that essentially, in the long run, resulted in wasting money even though I was still saving money, could always afford what I bought, etc.
And I spent a fair bit to give my kid interesting experiences and to help her develop her interests. Traveling soccer and traveling basketball was expensive. But then again being one state over looking at glacier national park mountains in the distance during a soccer tournament (and yes hoping they would lose early so we could drive the remaining 50 miles to look around, nope they didn’t) was something I wouldn’t have otherwise done on a weekend. The drive was beautiful even though I was not fond of kids’ sports and so the drive and view made it worth it above and beyond seeing my kid happy. Even then though (when I had a decent income) I still put a fairly high percentage of my income into savings before I spent anything on my wants (and that savings got me through a mostly empty house - two sets of deadbeat tenants as the mgt company didn’t choose well - house 2500 miles away on the market for over two years during the housing crash, then through over a year of minimal to no employment after a chemo damage disaster…).
The current anchor around my neck though is significant medical debt (from 3 cancers, one of which has no cure but a longer life span and from a couple of other medical issues) that is slowly going up faster than I can pay it down. I also have grad school loans (under grad loans are paid off; grad are high as cancer #1 happened in grad school and student health insurance sucked) that are in hardship deferment so the interest is being capitalized, which doesn’t help but I can’t do much about that. Making payments income dependent only postpones the problem as then you have to pay taxes on what is written off as if it was ordinary income and the IRS doesn’t take kindly to those who don’t pay their entire tax bill when due. As I satisfy Brunners I have looked in to bankruptcy with an adversarial proceeding to get rid of the school loans but the judge who replaced the one who retired in January has publicly stated he will never approve an adversarial proceedings for a school loan.
The other problem with bankruptcy is if I include the medical debt (my only real debt is medical and school loans as I do without a lot and live within my means - aka do without - even though I get food stamps and live in HUD) then the place I use for cancer won’t see me any more and I can’t afford to have that happen. So then there is no point in bankruptcy as there is nothing to include.
But what I have found is that while sometimes I have to do without something I really need, my happiness isn’t really affected all that much by not buying much. That, in a large part, I think is due to making sure I do things that enrich my life; things I enjoy. I volunteer with 2 no kill shelters, take care of cats at Petsmart once a week for one of them, volunteer at one of the local hospice facilities, and right now I am helping someone downsize and while that is a slow process (it is easier on her if I listen to the story on why she owns that, what is means to her, and then she can part with it with less stress) she changed her mind with me just carting it off to donate and said I can sell what she doesn’t want. So far I have made $136 doing that which is helpful. I also borrow someone’s canoe (actually my old canoe that they bought from me) and canoe on the reservoir, take the littles to the big playground and play with them there or to the fountain at the shopping center that kids can play in…Doing these things helps me focus less on the fact that I am about 1 month and 50 cents away from disaster and makes me feel like I am doing things that matter and bring me pleasure.
And that, I think, is one of the keys when cutting spending. Replace the spending with doing inexpensive/less expensive or free things (back to the pleasure/happiness thing) that you enjoy doing. Then it isn’t just depriving yourself by not spending, you are also replacing a “less productive” behavior with one that is “more productive” and so an empty hole is less likely to be there that cries out for the dopamine hit you get when you buy something.
Good luck not only with reducing your spending but doing it in a way that makes you happier in the long run.
@Kidsandliz jeez, I’m sorry that I have to run off this morning, because I’d like to leave a longer reply. But yeah, most philosophers end up saying that focusing on generosity, personal activity and calm reflection are a much better path to happiness than chasing after stuff, status and power. Choosing to find the genuine silver lining of being in a constrained financial situation is awesome.
VAN GOGH! MANGO! TANGO! AWESOME!
This is probably not my thread, what with today (Sunday) being the first time in three complete weeks that I don’t have a package arriving from Amazon or Woot.
@narfcake I agree with you
I just use constant all-around monetary guilt and anxiety to help keep me within safe parameters.
@narfcake But you DON’T have a package arriving. This means you spent less. Right?
@Kidsandliz
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
At least there has been no new catshirts in over two weeks, and they were $0 after Woot’s birthday coupons.
I still haven’t decided if that’s a blame or unblame for the scapegoat.
@cinoclav ate my homework.
Another thought process when considering an “I want” purchase.
Knickknacks and decorative items - Where am I going to put it? and Do I want to dust it?
Wearables - When/where will I wear it?and How many do I have that fit that need?
This helps me think about using something rather than buying strictly because I like it. I learned that I don’t have to own something just because I like it or it is on sale.
@speediedelivery YES!! For me, it’s usually the dusting that keeps me from buying something
@llangley @speediedelivery Dusting? I think I’ve heard of that.
@Barney @speediedelivery but have you heard of
Aubergine??
I had to look it up
@llangley Of course I have. Hasn’t everybody? (excluding you)
I applaud your efforts.
I started something similar maybe 5 months ago. Cutting back on expenses, I discontinued Amz Prime, Audible subscription, all pay TV services, bringing lunch to work rather than running out to grab something at lunchtime, preparing a morning beverage at home and bringing it to the office rather than stopping at a convenience shop on the way, scrutinizing every frivolous purchase and frequently being successful in skipping the spend, being more selective in my grocery purchases and avoiding items which are not on sale, etc.
My monthly credit card transactions went from avg approx $900 to around $400, so it’s obviously made a difference.
Really the only thing I pine for is pay TV. But since I’ve been distracted and busy getting everything ready here, then several trips to move mom across the country, even the lack of pay TV hasn’t been more than a blip. Now that she’s staying with me she is an endless source of distractions and I’m still not noticing the lack of pay TV as much. Once she’s into her own house, and I have my peace and quiet back, that may change. But for now it’s been tolerable. And just imagine all those shows to catch up on if I decide to go back to pay TV! I’ll have a full binging schedule for months.
@ruouttaurmind Why, oh why, do I find it hard to believe that your credit card bill is between $400-$900 a month?
@mfladd I don’t have to spend my own money when I can get all you suckers to spend yours!
Mind you, $400 is just the day to day incidentals and frivolities. I use another card when I’m in the mood for buying $2,000 tires for mom’s RV, $1,000 electrical and air conditioning repairs to the RV, UHaul rentals, multiple plane tix to Nashville, so many gallons of gas purchased along I-40 I don’t dare to add them all up…
I had to cut back on monthly expenses because the cost of moving her has likely affected the national economy and GNP.
@ruouttaurmind Cutting pay TV was a huge win. One time investment in a Tivo Roamio OTA w/ all-in (device lifetime guide service). Still have Netflix (buy GCs on sale/at discount - Target, Raise, Gift Card Granny, etc.) and Prime Video (buy ‘gift of prime’ on sale). Will be adding Pluto (completely free ‘live’ streaming TV, it is not on-demand).
I pay everything I can with 1% or 5% category cash back credit cards and always pay them off (never pay interest). When grocery stores are in the 5% CB category, I buy local grocery store gift cards to max the category. They should last until it comes around again. After that, it’s Amex Blue Cash with 3% groceries.
If you use credit card cash back right, it’s an extra discount for free.
I always buy gas at Costco (4% CB) or Sam’s (5%). ProTip - you can buy Sam’s GCs and they work at Wal-Mart gas to get you the WM discount. Or, go in the store and buy a WM GC to pay at the pump. WM gas stations have discounts for the WM credit card and WM/Sam’s GCs.
@mike808 I use Chase Freedom and Discover 5% bonus cash back when categories are gas or groceries. Those two cards seldom offer the same category at the same time, so for at least half the year I’m saving 5% on gas and groceries.
I also try to maximize the Kroger “fuel points” bonuses along the way, banking the points for a $1/gallon fuel discount. Another easy fuel discount is Shell’s Fuel Rewards card. The card is free and valid for $.05/gal every day. Combined with a credit card 5% cash back bonus, that can add up to real money over a year.
@ruouttaurmind do the math on Kroger fuel points though. Will you save more buying groceries elsewhere or with their $1.20 savings/$100 (if you have a vehicle where it is likely you are putting in 12 gallons)?
@Kidsandliz Fry’s (the Kroger affiliate in my region) is the most affordable option for groceries. The other major chain is Albertsons/Safeway (expensive). And of course Walmart and Target. Walmart sucks (meat/produce/deli selection and quality) and Target is expensive.
The Kroger fuel savings is just a bonus for groceries I will purchase there anyway.
Two vehicles x 16 gal. each. I have a friend drive my second vehicle and follow me to the gas station so I can get every penny of that fuel reward.
@Kidsandliz @ruouttaurmind Schnucks is the go-to store. Target has $10 off $50 frozen or groceries now and then, and you can stack redcard 5%. A lowes card gets me 5% off there for home stuff.
We have Aldi’s here, but wife won’t shop there, too euro for her. I like the adventure and the prices are good. For local produce, Dierbergs gets first grade stuff, and caters to more niche products gluten-free, vegan, free-range, organic, fair trade, etc - they carry Match (local St Louis non-animal meat) along with other brands of meat and dairy alternatives.
Pick up grocery gift cards during CB windows to stretch the discount.
So I know what a IRK is but bc I’ve been a woot member since they were woot. I just don’t know what they look like on this site and how to get them. Could someone help me out and clue me in?
@star2236 Sure, they work the same as Bags of Crap. They come up usually around meh.com’s birthday…which you just missed. You are aware they are called “Instant Regret Kits” not “I’m Rich Kiddos”?
Frequently they only contain disappointment and if you’re lucky a bag to hold your depair in.
@therealjrn thanks
@star2236 @therealjrn They used to be called fukoburos, or fukos for short (in the plural).
Only thing I ever got of use/interest was a 6-pack of Meh insulated stainless mugs. And some “organic” rat kill pellets. Not poison for people or pets, but kills rodents just the same - cornstarch pellets basically. Just don’t let your dog eat a bag of it.
Hate Kroger, I’m a meijer shopper in my area.
@star2236 Damn, that’s too bad, because all of meh are fans of Kroger. Looks like you’re never going to get that IRK. You were so fucking close.
@carl669
@therealjrn oh balling my eyes out now lol. I just don’t care for their selection of stuff they carry especially produce and ice cream. I’ve had bad experiences with customer service too. I still go in their if I need something really quick bc it closer.
@star2236 yep. Meijer really knows how to pretty consistently do produce. Kroger really sucks consistently for that.
But they both know how to do loss-leaders on a fairly regular cycle so planning can yield significant savings.
And leveraging both their digital programs also brings real savings.
But for gas, Costco and Sam’s start out dramatically cheaper at the pump price in our market vs Kroger & Meijer. Then top that off with 4/5% cash rewards on gas for paying with Costco/Sam’s credit cards.
Don’t put it on your Wishlist. You’re just shooting yourself in the foot. If you’re trying to buy less crap, why would you want to remind yourself of crap that you’ll want fleetingly a month from now?
If you don’t even remember it, you probably don’t really want it all that much.
@Limewater makes an excellent point.
@Limewater @ruouttaurmind
I put stuff on wishlist in order to remember it, in case I really actually for real for sure no lying no wishing need it someday. Don’t want to have to go track it down again.
I have no intention of ever purchasing what’s on my wishlist. Unless a real need hits.
@f00l @ruouttaurmind What kind of things do you discover that you need that you also have great risk of forgetting the existence of?
@f00l @Limewater @ruouttaurmind
But does the Wishlist have the benefit of - every time you go to your cart - showing you the price changes like “Save for later”?
(We’ve saved huge bucks this way - and Camelcamelcamel doesn’t always catch quick price drops.)
@f00l @Limewater @ruouttaurmind when you’re an octogenarian like me and the f00l you’ll understand. (I don’t know how old the f00l actually is, and if I did I’d forget, just like I forgot my own actual age.) WHICH IS MY POINT!
@UncleVinny I just passed on an Alexa powered twerking bear because of you.
@sammydog01 You will come to regret that decision
@sammydog01 this is the most wonderful news I’ve heard all week!
@sammydog01 ahhh but is when you pass on robots that we know that one of two things have happened. Either you have become serious about saving or you are about ready to go to the poor house
@Kidsandliz OR, @sammydog01 has completed her robot army and is about to activate her plans to take over the world?
@Kidsandliz @ruouttaurmind It’s most likely because I have a melodica coming from Amazon. I’ve hit rock bottom.
@ruouttaurmind @sammydog01 Well that could possibly an alternative explanation as well…
/giphy robot army
@Kidsandliz @ruouttaurmind @sammydog01 But imagine saying Alexa, “play melodica songs”, and then having the bear twerk to them!
@Kidsandliz @mfladd @ruouttaurmind @sammydog01 i feel like the bear should play
@Kidsandliz @ruouttaurmind @sammydog01 Those lightning deal melodicas are sooo tempting, aren’t they? Pretty sure the only reason I haven’t pulled the trigger is because I have a Tonette I bought last year at Goodwill and haven’t even sanitized yet, let alone played. And if I can’t even get off my ass to sanitize my Tonette, or learn to play the penny whistle my high school boyfriend’s family brought me back from Ireland almost 30 years ago, I am not allowed to buy a melodica, no matter how amazing it looks.
Fun fact: the Tonette was featured in the Cream song Pressed Rat and Warthog.
/youtube pressed rat and warthog
@mossygreen Love me a tin whistle jig!
I need to do the “less” thing with what I eat. That might help the spending bit, too. Maybe if I put the rubber bands over my mouth? Hmm, I want a cheeseburger.
@PlutoIsAPlanet
@PlutoIsAPlanet coincidentally, I’ve been eating more sensibly, too. One helps with the other, but I haven’t noticed the success flowing the other direction. Anyhoo, both scaling-back decisions feel healthy, so that’s good!
@PlutoIsAPlanet @UncleVinny I find healthy food cost a whole lot more than crappy foods.
Are you stopping/slowing the purchasing of books?
That’s my area of weakness.
@f00l Electronic ones? Can’t help you. But I have a buddy who seriously needs to quit buying physical books. He gets some great deals on used books, but even he admits he will never, ever in a hundred lifetimes read them all.
@f00l @therealjrn take a gander at your local library!
…but I’m sure you’ve already read all their stuff? On a related (and repeated) note, I got me a copy of Three Men in a Boat a few days ago. Thanks again for the rec!
@f00l @therealjrn @UncleVinny which reminds me of [This interesting read…][1]
[1]: Whose Boat Is This Boat?: Comments That Don’t Help in the Aftermath of a Hurricane https://www.amazon.com/dp/1982121084/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_s9TpDb1GZ6F6W
@f00l the library can be a great resource both for physical and ebooks
@f00l @llangley @UncleVinny
Only 24 pages? Shit, must have been a slow morning for our Commander in Chief. Did they catch all his Tweets too? The audio-book is under $2.
You guys go ahead and yuck it up–you’ll have a bonus four more years of that magnificent man here shortly.
@f00l @therealjrn @UncleVinny I don’t know, local libraries often have withdrawn books for sale, which will only compound the problem.
My old strategy used to be being broke. My new strategy is, I keep the things I have already purchased, and think about my (lack of) use of them when I want to buy another thing. It helps to say things like “Of course you can buy that (hobby thing, video game, book, battery pack). Just consume or dispose of the ones you already have, first.” It’s also helpful for me to recognize that I can literally ignore sales and good deals, and in that strategic decision, save money overall.
I also try to postpone purchasing decisions until I’m rested and in a good mood, for maximum will power.
@InnocuousFarmer I’ve heard of this, one in, one goes out. I think it would work with clothes, books, porcelain owls, etc.
What about “new” technology? I’ve been getting some cameras for household security where I didn’t have cameras before.
@InnocuousFarmer Oh, and a Twerking Bear today for $8. I’ve never had a Twerking $8 Bear.
@therealjrn It’s not a one in one out thing. Just a convenient pile of evidence that tends to contradict the belief that a given purchase is worth making. If I have multiple books by an author that are unread, that argues against buying another one right at the moment. Or, if I have three power banks that I barely use, maybe I shouldn’t buy two more.
Obviously step 1 is to buy the twerk bear, poke at it for five minutes, and then never turn it on again, but leave it out, so that it can watch you and judge your future acquisitions.
@InnocuousFarmer @therealjrn twerking bears have been monitored for millennia and are indeed breathtakingly censorious.
i don’t have a wall of text to contribute, but i can share my experience here. after dropping VMP my purchasing went way down. i purchased over $3K of “stuff” here in the first year. after the first year i think Meh. decided that it was a bad idea to sum it up for you. many purchases look way less attractive when you add on $5 shipping. i applaud your efforts.
/image wall of text
/youtube in the first year
/giphy it was a bad idea
/8ball “less attractive when you add on $5 shipping?”
Outlook good
amazing
You do have a real problem.
I get in enough trouble buying stuff I think I want!