We’re not selling this deal anymore, but you can buy it at Amazon

Zen Logic Wireless Speaker/Power Bank Bundles

  • Okay, so here’s the price difference explained, as far as we can tell:
  • The cheaper one is way more goofy looking and colorful and also has a bluetooth range of 30 feet and can last 3-4 hours on one charge.
  • The more expensive one looks pretty normal, has a bluetooth range of 33 feet, and can last up to 4 hours on one charge.
  • Both speakers feature a bult-in mic for hands-free speakerphone use. You know, for your very important bizness calls.
  • Models: ZL-SMBG, & ZL-SMBP, and ZL-EPWPB, ZL-EMWPB, & ZL-EOWPB. The only letter that changes is the one in the middle, which denotes color. If that upsets you, we’re sorry, but don’t worry; as a certain Mr. Eat World once said, while discussing things in the middle: “Everything, everything will be just fine.”
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Enlightenment Is Attainable

This just seems crazy to us. No, not the product. We understand the product just fine. Each one is a bluetooth speaker that comes with a power bank. One is slightly better than the other, so it costs just a few more dollars.

What’s crazy is that you could name your brand “Zen Logic” and not do any zen-related marketing. In fact, it seems so crazy that we’re willing to offer our help. Zen Logic, if you’re reading this, feel free to use any of these custom koans and proverbs that we’ve put together:

What is the sound of one phone charging? Whatever song you are playing on your bluetooth speaker!

~

To follow the path, look to the master, follow the master, walk with the master, dance with the master, charge the master’s phone as a gesture of goodwill, see through the master, become the master, keep dancing, nobody said to stop dancing.

~

You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger. And nothing makes a person angrier than a dead phone and a silent room, amirite?!

~

When an ordinary man attains knowledge, he is a sage; when a sage attains understanding, he is an ordinary man. But the thing about both sages and ordinary men: they both wanna bump some Carly Rae at the beach and not worry about their devices running out of juice.

~

Before enlightenment; charge your phone, listen to podcasts. After enlightenment; charge your phone, listen to podcasts.

~

Does the phone receive the charge, or does the charge receive the phone? Also, you get a bluetooth speaker.

~

Sometimes, simply by sitting, the soul collects wisdom. Sometimes, simply by Tweeting, the seal collects likes. Sometimes simply by playing the new Father John Misty in the park on a portable speaker, the soul collects hipster cred.

OMG, people! It’s happened: through this little exercise, we’ve reached enlightenment! And what we’ve learned here on this elevated plane is that co-opting zen principles to sell stuff, even just by using the word “zen” in the name of your brand that makes speakers and chargers, is not zen at all.

Wow, kind of a bummer we figured this out right at the END of the write-up, huh? Could’ve saved ourselves some time…

So far today...

  • 60697 of you visited.
  • 39% on a phone, 6% on a tablet.
  • 4865 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 485 of these.
  • Deal ended .
  • That’s $5324 total.
  • (including shipping)

Who's buying this crap?

Which items are you buying?