Pick-2: Clawz Unisex Clogs
- Crocs for your eccentric friend
- Good for gardening
A Meh-rathon of Sweet Meh-mories
This is a pick-2-pack of Clawz. You either know what those are, or can jump in the forum to ask other people about them.
Why aren’t we giving you more info? Well, we weren’t sure what to write for the Meh-rathon so we decided to look at some past Meh write-ups for inspiration. (You can find a random one here, if you want.) Unfortunately, all that did was make us nostalgic and maybe a little teary-eyed. And then the boss was all “Where’s the write-ups, writer dude?” and we panicked and… uhh… Please enjoy this classic write-up about an entirely different product! Also, feel free to share in the forum if you find one you liked or forgot about or missed entirely.
What you get with other razors is pretty simple: a brand name and a shave. With these razors, we’re obligated to keep the company that makes them a secret. You might think that means you only get the shave, no name. But you actually get so much more! Such as:
A Smug Sense Of Superiority
These other people–nay, these other sheep–wander around, blindly trusting the messages pedaled by our corporate overlords, but not you. No, you’re enlightened. If you could sharpen kale stalks into rustic straight-blade razors, you would. But you can’t. You’ve tried. So you’re left with one other option: unnamed razors purchased on a cheap deal-a-day site. Are they corporately-made razors? Sure. But at least you get to say: “I may not be able to avoid you, but that doesn’t mean I have to like you!”
Potential Podcast Fame
Maybe buying a Gillette razor will give you some peace of mind. But you don’t build a podcast empire on peace of mind. You build it on unanswered questions. You build it information that seems forever on the periphery, always close, but never clear. What we’re saying is, if you buy these razors, it just lead you to launch a wildly popular serialized investigative podcast in order to search out the truth: who made the razors? Can Gillette give you that?
A Possible Connection To A Possibly Award Winning Movie
Will we say definitively that the razors we’re selling here are the same brand and style that Mr. Robot himself Rami Malek used to shave his other-worldly jawline, leaving only the iconic Freddie Mercury mustache for his performance in what just might be the film of the year, Bohemian Rhapsody? No. We won’t say that. But we also won’t definitively say that it’s NOT the same type of razor he used either. Eh?
See? You can’t get fun like this with some brand-flaunting store-bought razors.
