Let's Just Be Honest

These? They’re not the best earbuds on the market.

We know, we know. That’s some bold marketing transparency there, isn’t it? And yet, we’re not saying anything you haven’t likely already surmised based on the fact that we’re offering them for $9.99.

Like, these things could meet ALL of the ends-up-on-Meh criteria–we’re talking, they’re the best earbuds in all of Denmark but never caught on here, and also they’re a weird color, and also that color was a special custom color for exclusive sale in select Starbucks shops, only Starbucks decomitted last minute leaving some vendor just begging us to help them unload their warehouse overflowing with hot pink Danish buds–and we’d still offer them for at least $20 if they were any good.

But anyway, you should buy them. Because you likely already have a great pair of earbuds you absolutely love. And when those crap out, you’ll want to get another pair that you absolutely love.

Okay, sure. The logic sounds a bit wonky here, but we can explain: when the earbuds you love die, you won’t want to compromise on ‘best option available nearby.’ No, you’ll want to replace them with a new pair of those same earbuds. If some nearby box store happens to sell them, great. But it’s very likely you’ll have to order them online, and even if they’re on Prime and things work out perfectly, they still will not arrive the second you hit the buy button.

Which is fine. Some things can take time. That’s allowed. And besides, there’s no shortage of instantly available stuff out there. Like songs. And audiobooks. And podcasts. You know, all the stuff you listen to on your commute. Or when you’re walking from the bus/train station to your office in the morning, or to your house at night. Or when you’re making dinner. Or when you’re doing dishes after dinner. Or when you’re taking a little walk at dusk. Or when–

Well, you get it.

The problem? Those things don’t stop just because your earbuds bit the dust. And trust us: if you think your commutes or walks or dinner prep or dishes take forever with all sorts of audio entertainment at your disposal, having nothing to listen to will make them feel like they last FOREVER!

Which is all to say, yes, these would be a step down from a good pair. But as a pair to use when your old good earbuds are dead and your new good earbuds haven’t arrived yet, they’re fine. Then, when the good ones show up, these become backups. Or you can give them to someone. Or you can take the tips and throw the actual buds in the trash. We don’t care.

Point is, you’ll get your money’s worth. Because these? They’re not worth much money.