GT-Lite Motion Sensing 70FT 180º LED Security Light

  • Motion sensing security lights because motion means DANGER
  • Motion!
  • Ack!
  • Model: Instead of reviews, we’re thinking about the origin of Model Numbers: 6 Certainly people just give their products unique names, but as you create more products, and as the differences and improvements get more subtle, it’s far easier to come up with a model number than a fully new marketing name.
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Apocalypse Soonish

Day 1

Dear Journal,

I have emerged from the Cryopod to a landscape of horror. A horrorscape, if you will.

My memory was frozen, along with my brain and body, in July of 2017. I don’t know what year it is, or what caused my Cryopod to deactivate. Something terrible has happened. Something that has decimated the Earth and society as I know it. Or knew it.

Houses: burned. Landscapes: blighted. Recyclables: not appropriately separated.

What happened in those years I was away?

What foul — hold on, what’s this, Journal? As I write this I think I hear a —

2

Dog. Or a cat. Some domesticated creature is scrabbling and scratching from beneath a caved-in roof. It is a relief to know something has survived whatever it is that has happened.

As I write this I am tossing rubble aside with both hands, trying to reach the distressed pet. A friend would be most welcome in these bleak times.

Wait, the source of this frantic scrabbling isn’t a dog or cat. It’s a —

3

Possum! An enormous Didelphis virginiana, I am sure of it. I recognize this remarkable marsupial from my days as a —

Hold on, Journal. Something is amiss with this possum. Something is terribly amiss. It’s morphology is all wrong: flattened skeletal system, protruding eyes, trailing viscera.

I think this possum is —

4

Roadkill! Yes, I’m sure of it. I’ve seen enough possums flattened to the pavement to recognize the characteristic symptoms.

But, if this possum is indeed roadkill, how comes it to be alive? What awful force has quickened the dead?

I reckon an undead companion better than none at all, and have lassoed the beast. I think I will call her Virginia.

As I observe the wreckage of the home under which Virginia was trapped, I see the cause of the structural failure was …

5

Due to an over-loaded attic. It seems the owner of this home had loaded his or her storage areas with so much stuff that it simply collapsed. Among these sundries I find —

6

Abox of HT-Lite Motion Sensing LED Security Lights. Indeed, this exemplary product was pinning down my undead pet possum, Virginia.

How came this house to be stuffed with —

Hold on, journal. As I write this I am chasing Virginia, who has freed herself from my control and gone galloping (in her lurching, broken-limbed way) through the wreckage. She seems to be following some scent, such as —

So far today...

  • 144286 of you visited.
  • 42% on a phone, 7% on a tablet.
  • 1175 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 47 of these.
  • Deal ended .
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  • (including shipping)

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