Fidget About It

Today’s sale leaves us conflicted. On the one hand, this would seem like an Order/Hoarder sale: you’re given options, some more reasonable than others. On the other, it’s not exactly the same as past Order/Hoarder sales we’ve offered. For example, there are more than two options. So, if you don’t mind, we thought we could work through this together, with a little Q&A:

How does the math break down?

This is a little more complicated than usual. You can get a 40 pack of basic fidget spinners for $14 ($0.35/spinner) or a 40 pack of LED fidget spinners for $16 ($0.40/spinner). But you could also get a 160 pack of both LED and basic fidget spinners (an 80 and 80 split) for $34. Which is about $0.21 per spinner… except, if you think about it: the first 40 basic spinners cost $14 and the first 40 LED spinners cost $16, which adds up to $30. So that’s a mere $4 for the last 80 fidget spinners, or a nickel per! CRAZY!

So then why wouldn’t this be an Order/Hoarder sale?

For three reasons:

1. As mentioned above, it’s not an either/or. There are three options.

2. 40 fidget spinners will already have you well on your way to hoarding fidget spinners; but, more importantly…

3. These aren’t really for hoarding! We’re offering them now, because we want to get them to you with plenty of time to spare before the end of the month. That way, you can offer them out to Trick Or Treaters on Halloween. That doesn’t sound very hoarderly at all, does it?

Why wouldn’t you just give candy away on Halloween like everyone else?

Because fidget spinners are fun and will last longer. Also, this site is run by someone from Saint Louis where some people give out jokes instead of chocolate, so it’s kind of on brand for us to eschew the national standard for Halloween practices.

Wait, back up: what even ARE fidget spinners?

They’re goofy little spinny toys with no real purpose other then to be fidgeted with.

That’s sorta dumb, isn’t it?

You might think so, but in a world where people try to sell peppermint-scented oil as an alternative to physical therapy, I find it refreshing that there’s a product out there that’s explicitly for useless goofings-off.

Hey: fidget spinners. Halloween. Did I see that on the forum?! Is this the third day in a row that you’ve sold something someone suggested you sell, after making a big show about how you don’t take requests on Saturday??

Umm… no comment.