3-Pack: LED Multi-Function Lantern Lights
- You get three of these multifunction lighter-uppers
- Click! It’s a flashlight! Click! It’s a lantern! Click! It’s a nightlight! Repeat until your tentmates start throwing things at you
- Lantern casts 26 lumens of light for up to 13 hours
- Flashlight throws 19 lumens for up to 25 hours
- …on the included set of 3 AA batteries, we mean
- Model: no model number (What? You guys couldn’t even give it something lazy like LIGHT1 or obnoxious like 0O1I-XX4x9653-00oO? We NEED model numbers to do this ridiculous review every day! The people demand it!)
How do you spell "LED"?
We were always a little confused by the idea that you could use a dictionary to find out how a word should be spelled. If you don’t know how to spell it, how can you look it up in the dictionary? It only works if you know the first few letters - or, at least, if you’re able to guess the first few letters. But if it comes down to guessing, why bother at all?
That’s kind of how flashlights are. They’re great if you know what to look for. Or where to look for it. But they leave the rest of the world in darkness. Worse, even: they leave it in deeper darkness because of the glare of the flashlight.
You’ll see what you know is there. But you’ll miss everything around you that you don’t know is there, whether that’s a venomous snake, a dead body, or a bag of money dropped by a dying bank robber after he was bitten by a venomous snake.
To score that kind of loot, you need a lantern. These here things will cast a gentle glow all about you, and you get three of them to expand the effective lumosphere. They’ll work as flashlights, too, when you need to cast a little spotlight on something specific. There’s also an orange night light LED for those times when you don’t want to see anything too clearly.
Otherwise, using a flashlight to do a lantern’s job is like relying on a dictionary for spelling instead of just defenitions and pronounciation. We don’t reccomend it.
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