Are pumpkin spies watching YOU?

Maybe you’re a pumpkin spice junkie. You know it’s only August. So what? No calendar can control your raging pumpkin spice jones. You need the stuff, need it now, man. Nothing else in life beats the bliss of that creamy, warm melange of cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, and cloves. But you’ve felt the sting of the pumpkin spice backlash. You know people will make fun of you for it. “Pumpkin spice? This early?” the idiots will guffaw. “You must be a real addict! Haw haw!”

These Bubba 24-ounce insulated bottles got you covered. They’ll keep that hot latte hot, or that iced latte cold, for hours, to maintain that pumpkin spice high for as long as you can handle it. The leak-proof lid slaps shut after every sip, so no bystanders will catch a telltale whiff. You’ll still need to cover it on your breath, but you’re an addict. You knew that already.

Or maybe the situation is the exact opposite. Maybe you’re a pumpkin spice hater. You know it’s only August. So what? Pretty soon you’ll be surrounded with pumpkin spice zombies in your workplace, school, or home. Nothing else in life makes you sick like that cloying reek of cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, and cloves. You don’t know what the others will do to you if they find out you’re not one of them. “Pumpkin spice! How can you not like it?” they’ll demand. “Unclean! Heretic! Die! Die!”

Again, these Bubba 24-ounce insulated bottles to the rescue. Opaque and leak-proof, they let you pretend you’re swilling pumpkin-spice swill all the livelong day and the Pumpkin Spice Inquisitors will be none the wiser.

Whatever your relationship to pumpkin spice, these bottles are essential. Even if you like lots of other beverages that you like to keep warm or cold, and you don’t see pumpkin spice as the defining cultural schism of our time. Weirdo.