Your best cold remedies -- superstition and old wives tales welcome
5It seems that every year around this time offices across the country are filled with the joyous sounds of coughing, wheezing, and the blowing of snotty noses.
The Mediocre Labs office is no exception and over the past few weeks we've had various varieties of maladies and sickness roll through and wreck havoc on our immune systems (including my own).
While I honestly and truly believe that the best cure for most of this stuff is the standard bedrest, fluids, and over the counter medicine...
I still want to hear about your foolproof cure-all remedies.
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Rest, fluids, and juggling.
Take two and call me in the morning.
I use Umcka. Works for me.
http://www.umcka.com/
If I tell you to take a bunch of fermented cod liver oil and raw elderberry syrup along with diffusing thieves essential oil how weird will you think I am?
@chellemonkey No weirder than we thought you were before. :)
@chellemonkey Somebody else recently told me to try elderberry. I guess I'll have to try it out. And I already take cod liver oil, but I'm pretty sure it's not fermented.
I meditate with the mantra: "I am not sick. I am not getting sick. I will never be sick." over and over. It only works if you truly believe it.
@hallmike A little fairy dust along with that will make you fly ;)
A friend's trick from high school is what I try to use when I can:
One day of full on pampering, doing as little as possible, constant water, etc. Just be a total baby about it. You're on death's door, or at least you're letting your body believe that.
And then when you wake up on day two: act completely healthy, regardless of any symptoms or how you feel. Act healthier than normal. Go out and get exercise, drink, eat. You're 100% healthy, or at least you're going to fool yourself into believing that.
You basically tell your body "you get one day to be sick, and then we're better."
@dave I like it, but I usually have a problem with the first part. I'm more of a caretaker so I kinda hate just being a baby and laying around, I feel too guilty and always try to get up and do stuff.
@dave even if you feel good, you're still contagious
@katylava I didn't say it was a good idea.
@dave Now all of the meh office will know who to blame if they get sick and it won't be @lisaviolet
I usually take Zicam when I start to feel cold symptoms come on. It usually works in keeping the "feeling like crap" symptoms from going past a day or so. This time it didn't work. I'm on day 7 of feeling like crap. I begrudgingly went to the Dr. today and got an antibiotic. Merry fucking Christmas.
Southern Comfort 100 Proof - works for me
@gerrittsolberg I was gonna say Nyquil. Same principle.
@joelmw Back in college, my roommate and I came up with one heck of a home remedy: Jack-quil. Exactly what you think it is, one shot of Jack Daniels and one shot of Nyquil. You'll sleep like a baby. Probably oversleep for class and/or work the next morning, too!
@DJP519 Nyquil is not the same as it used to be. 1980's Nyquil would knock me out like a anesthesiologist - I've awakened the next day with a textbook still on my face. Modern stuff just makes me drowsy. I miss the good old days when products were hazardous.
@joelmw Has anyone else noticed that NyQuil started putting a disclaimer on the box that says you're not supposed to use it to make children go to sleep?
@DJP519 I approve. I might have to try that. I'm a little stitious like @JonT or I'd say I can't wait to get sick.
@Pamtha
@Kleineleh that's what Benadryl is for.
If it's in your head:
If it's really stuffed up, use some Afrin to get it un stuffed. Use with caution - addictive. Then rinse sinuses with salt water (NeilMed squeezy bottle) and use a saline mist to keep things moist. Take pseudoephedrine - get the real stuff.
Drink lots of water.
If it's in your chest:
Take guaifenesin to break it up. Take dextromethorphan to suppress your cough if it's a problem.
Drink lots of water.
I prefer to buy generic bottles of the above because the all in ones often contain acetaminophen, which i like to avoid, and I don't always have cough and head symptoms at the same time. Also cheaper in the long run.
Use ibuprofen or aspirin for headaches if needed.
Use zinc lozenges throughout, but don't overdo it.
Now the important stuff:
Margaritas made with real lime juice and good tequila (why no acetaminophen).
Fresh tortilla chips
The hottest salsa you can possibly stand.
I find it really helps, but it's not good to get drunk. Once you get to buzzed it's time to quit for a while.
Above all, avoid antibiotics unless your doctor is certain it's a bacterial infection or your are in a risk group for secondary infections. Antibiotics do fuck all for viral infections which most colds are. As is the flu.
@Headly You said: "Take pseudoephedrine - get the real stuff. " But - wouldn't that be "ephedrine"?
@rockblossom Well, real as in the stuff they keep behind the counter, not the crap they keep on the shelves (phenylephrine). That stuff does nothing, or at least not much compared to pseudoephedrine. Ephedrine is also quite effective but it's also more of a stimulant too.
@Headly When I die, it will be due to pseudoephedrine overdose in the month of May.
@JerseyFrank I feel you. pseudoephedrine and clariten and NasaCort oh my!
@Headly And in my state you have to get an Rx to get both that and the 12 hour Afrin. How stupid is that? Pay for a doctor apt to get an RX for what is over the counter in most states.
@Kidsandliz Can't have you cooking up meth in your garage now can we?
@Headly I'm safe - no garage.
@Kidsandliz @Headly I saw Breaking Bad so I'm pretty sure I could do it.
@JonT In a 1000ml wide-mouthed Erlenmeyer flask, 19 grams of aluminum foil cut to 3x3cm pieces was amalgamated in a solution of 500mg mercuric chloride (HgCl2) in 700ml warm water until the solution became greyish, and hydrogen bubbles was evolved in a steady rate from the aluminum surface. The water was decanted off, and the aluminum amalgam was washed with 2x500ml cold water. To the aluminum amalgam there was added 29.5g methylamine hydrochloride (0.44 mol, 3 eqv) dissolved in 30ml hot water, 75 ml isopropanol, 70ml 25% aqueous NaOH (0.44 mol), 19.75g (0.147 mol) phenyl-2-propanone (P2P) and finally 175ml isopropanol. Hydrogen was vigorously evolved from the aluminum amalgam, and the temperature of the solution rose quickly. The reaction rate was controlled by immersing the reaction flask in cold water during 2h, whereafter it was allowed to stand at room temperature with magnetic stirring overnight, with attention being given to the reaction mixture during the first hour so that the temperature did not rise over 50°C. To the reaction mixture there was added another 50ml 25% NaOH, and the reaction mixture was stirred for 30min and then allowed to settle. The clear supernatant was decanted, and 100ml isopropanol was added to the grey sludge, and it was stirred for 15min, and the supernatant again decanted. The aluminum sludge at the bottom of the flask was now filtered through celite in a buchner funnel and washed with 2x50ml THF (methanol can also be used). All the decantations and washes were combined, and the solution concentrated under vacuum. The residue was taken up in 1000ml water, acidified by the addition of conc HCl, and washed with 3x50ml DCM, basified with 25% NaOH, and extracted with 3x100ml DCM. The combined DCM extracts were dried over MgSO4, filtered and the solvent distilled off. The residue was distilled twice under aspirator vacuum at 100-110°C to give 14.65g (67%) of methamphetamine freebase as a water-white oil. The hydrochloride salt can be prepared by dissolving the oil in 10x the volume of diethyl ether and gassing the solution with dry HCl gas until no more precipitate forms. The methamphetamine hydrochloride is filtered off with suction and washed with diethyl ether and air dried. Simple
@Headly Did you forget to mix this mess in an aluminum pie tin in case it is a catalyst for a big bang (I can state with certainty when making flash powder using an aluminum pie tin to mix things in is not a wise move)? I take it the intent here is to kill someone so they won't suffer from their cold?
@Headly Is this okay? Are we all going to jail now?
@JonT It has google's seal of approval...
@JonT Yes, but we're gonna be rich as shit when we get out.
@Headly And now the FBI, CIA, and DEA have you in their cross hairs…
@Headly claritin D is also useful, if you start it prior to the shot, to kill the bone pain from neulasta, not just allergies
@Kidsandliz yeah, they probably are stupid enough to confuse breaking bad references with the real thing.
My doctor thinks this is really funny:
If you don't do anything for a cold, you're going to have it for a full week, but if you take the proper OTC meds, you'll only have it for about seven days.
Laughter is the best medicine once again. I just stay hydrated, take symptomatic meds mostly to help keep from spreading it, and at the slightest hint of either fever or chills, I pile on warm jammies and sweatclothes and stuff and climb into bed under tons of blankets and comforters. I can often sweat something out overnight and wake up feeling great. If you try this and die, it didn't work for you.
Sleep, chicken soup, vitamin C, and whining like a complete brat for 3 days.
@Thumperchick You nailed it! The only thing I would add is lots and lots of booze. The whining really works!
@Thumperchick Whining is the best part of any medical issue. Crying, too. When I had my "procedure" done, the one where I had to prep, when I was in the kitchen stirring the dirty water aka chicken broth and my husband was eating a PB&J sammich, he looks at me and asked "are you crying?" Yeah. I was crying. He felt sorry for me, but wouldn't let me have a bite of his sandwich.
@lisaviolet and who's fault is that?
I take a ton of Airborne as soon as I feel the slightest hint of it coming on.. It usually helps.
@kadagan I usually do a rain dance right when I think we've hit too long of a dry spell. If I do it enough days it a row, it always works.
@kadagan You'd be better off with the fairy dust: http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/OnCall/story?id=1664514
@hallmike But it was invented by a school teacher!!
@hallmike It doesn't cure colds but it does help pump up the immune system to some degree. Not a miracle product but an easy to use supplement full of vitamins and minerals. A little boost can't hurt.
Cold-Ez tablets and green smoothies: Big handful of spinach, smaller handful of kale, banana, handful of frozen strawberries and a handful of frozen blueberries. Blend in a blender with a bit of ice and about a cup of water.
@Bingo - I second the Cold Eeze - Zinc lozenges really help if you use them early on.. Blocks the virus from replicating. I find a splash of orange juice in hot water to be soothing - like orange tea.
Also, close your eyes and picture your body literally fighting the battle against the sickness. (And winning. That part's important.)
@dave Whoops, I started doing this before I read the last part and now I'm gravely ill because I immediately pictured my body losing.
@dave - I always think of my white cells as a militia deploying to attack the evil invader cells.
I remember, when I was a much younger man, that working out seemed to help. And I swear when I was in the heat of, say, a good pickup basketball game, I'd forget I was even sick. You might say, you couldn't have been that sick in the first place, but I was, damnit, I was. It's just that I was young and stupid and, apparently, full of energy. I think one of the benefits is that I would push my body to a point that, once I was out of the workout, I felt completely exhausted, couldn't compensate anymore and felt genuinely god-awful sick. Then of course, as @JonT mentioned, I no longer felt guilty and could with a clear conscience say I was sick and I'd dope up and sleep for a few days (thought not usually for a few whole days).
I wouldn't do that to myself anymore. Not totally sure that I could. I mean the workout. These days, as long as I can leave a convincing enough voicemail for my boss (and I know that I feel too shitty to actually accomplish anything at work anyway), I call that shit in.
Drugs. Lots of drugs (mostly been covered, but I'm a big fan of the Nyquil). Sleep.
Interestingly, when I'm not quite sick enough, Nyquil gives me weird insomnia. I've usually gone back to work before then.
@joelmw Plus you're doing your colleagues a solid by leaving your germ ridden body at home...
@Headly I was gonna say something about that. I get pissed at the assholes who bring their sick into work. Passive-aggressive bullshit, if you ask me. Unless it's their boss pushing 'em. But I don't mean that categorically, just mostly.
Plenty of Jamaican rum. I like to be inebriated when I am too ill to function like a normal person.
Nyquil/Dayquil. forget the dosage cup, just take a swig.(do the same thing with pepto)
Jasmine tea
50/50 mixture of Hawaiian punch/7up(or sprite, sierra mist, etc.)
Egg Drop Soup
My Grandma had a drink mix she called "cold remedy", I don't remember an exact Recipe for it, but I do know it contained both Tang, and Instant Tea.
@earlyre My mom used to make a thing she called Russian tea, that contained Tang and instant tea and some spices. That was good stuff.
Tea+lots of honey+lemon. Any tea will do, but if you have a sore throat this Throat Coat Tea can work wonders. Believe it or not, this is how I survived swine flu.
whisky tea
I would suggest getting shingles when suffering from a cold or flu. You will be so focused on the shingles you will no longer thing about your cold or flu. Or if you do that while also having chemo you won't be thinking about chemo nausea either… In this respect there is a lot to recommend shingles.
@Kidsandliz My husband and I nearly got divorced over shingles. I wanted brown shingles, he wanted standard black. Maybe all the arguing kept adrenalin high and the viruses were scared off? I still admire these brown shingles every time I go outside. #winning
ExLax. It doesn't help the cold, but you'll be afraid to cough.
When I was in China I would order Ginger Coke Tea whenever I started to get a sore throat. It’s just Coke boiled with slices of ginger, but it seems to help. I still recommend it to friends as an “ancient Chinese secret”. My other advice is to go to the Dixie House for the vegetable plate, soup and hot rolls. It’s my go-to comfort food for any ailment.