Marklog's story
6So I was looking for the thread containing the story that got @marklog voted as the scapegoat of the month and I believe it's been lost forever. Does anyone have a direct link or archival of the story? I tried explaining to a friend where the "tl:dr I fingered my dog" thing came from but it's not as funny that way.
- 8 comments, 36 replies
- Comment
You should bookmark this. Keep it forever. Pass the story down to your children.
@harrison aha good show
@harrison
@harrison Perfect! Now they won't think I'm absolutely crazy... I'm still not convinced you guys actually do anything around the office with how fast the responses were.
@Trailmix I'm quite busy, actually, so please excuse me while I take things apart and upload more Soccer Physics replays.
@harrison seriously.
@marklog
@harrison homestah wunner!
we need to remember the title of the thread it was in to find it via the search feature. It was a thread about sharing embarrassing stories but keywords I tried have yet to pull it back up.
edit: and @harrison saves the day ^^
@snapster I was just going to tell @trailmix to search for 'are you dumber than me', but apparently @Harrison had a better idea...
Now that the story has been found, can we PLEASE get @nathank to translate the story to Korean (and consequently make a new thread) ? I think the crappy Google translate responses would be a riot.
@Trailmix I found my challenge here. I'm hit the writer's block.. I don't think my translation will be as awesome as the original
We can't have @marklog 's contribution to our shared culture slip away forgotten. To that end, I made a grandma-quality scrapbook page so that marklog can continue to touch us all.
@Starblind
@Starblind Copies of this should go out in the next Fuku bag.
@Starblind
@Starblind This is AMAZING. I shall learn how to scrapbook and include this.
@Starblind Fantastic. Can someone knit this on a pillow? Now that would be perfect for a future fuku!
@marklog Thanks for taking it with good humour, as you always do. Everything might be your fault this month, but you're still awesome.
@marklog I have some scrapbooking supplies I never used (never did scrapbook but certain people thought I should be doing that) that didn't sell in my garage sale yesterday if you would like them.
@Kidsandliz Thanks, but any reference to me scrapbooking was purely for comedic benefit. The craftiness is weak in this one.
Google Translated into Korean:
나는 나의 아내를 만났을 때 그녀는 두 개를 가지고 있었다. 하나의 뜨거운 여름 날, 개 1 개 2는 일부 좋와 '에 대한 거실을 사용하기로 결정했다. 그들은 ... 다시 다시 있었고, 작은 한 (여성 시바 INU)는 미친 듯이 울부 짖고 있었다. 그는 두들겨 줄 알았어처럼 남성 (근친 Keeshond는) 나를보고 있었다. 그들은 매우 명확하게 분리하고있었습니다,하지만 뭔가가 함께 들고 있었다. 소음은 무서웠다. 나는 책임있는 애완 동물 소유자는 무엇을 할 것이라고했다. 내 손가락을 삽입하고 서로 붙어 이유를 알아 내려고 노력을 주위에 흔들. 내 아내는이 장면에 걸어와 아웃 섹스를 놀라게 시작했다. 나, 내 무릎에 내 다른 개에 붙어 내 개를 헤아리는.
소용 없어. 그들은 붙어 있었고, 좋은 붙어.
그래서 나는 수의사에게 전화를 상황을 설명했다. 나는 내가 지금까지 시도했다 무엇에 걸어 어떤 전화, 그 결과 (변경 없음)를 응답 한 아가씨에게 말했다. 좋은 여자가 잡아달라고. 그녀는 나중에 다시 스피커폰 분에 대한 와서 이야기를 반복���는 나에게 물었다. 나는했다.
내 이야기를 이야기하는 동안 나는 대여섯 사람들이 내 불행에서 자신의 엉덩이를 웃음에 대해들을 수 있기 때문에 분명히 그녀는 그녀에게이 모든 큰 실수를 그녀의 사무실 전체를 수집했다. 내 이야기를 통해 도착하면, 나는 조언을 한 번 더 요청했다. 응답 :
나는 그것처럼 보이지 않는 알고 있지만 그들이 재미있어, 그들이 가자. 걸리는 경우 이상 이십 분 이상 그들에 물을 던져. 그들은 원시했고 상당한 시간이 내 아내를 터치 할 수 없습니다 때까지 내 손을 씻어.
TL : DR, 나는 나의 개를 손가락.
@marklog This is one of the most awesome thing EVER
@nathanK I'll have to trust you on that...
@marklog Now I'm actually thinking about translating this.. It might be sort of rite of passage for Korean users. Those who survive will be meh-niacs. Who doesn't will never come back..
@nathanK Translate it! :D
@nathanK And their responses!
Google translated Korean and then back into Engrish.
When I met my wife she had two. One hot summer day, I decided to use the living room for some lovin 'one more 2. They ... were back to back, little one was crying like crazy (female Shiba INU) is. He was looking like a beaten man I knew (inbred Keeshond is) me. They were very clearly separated, but something was holding together. Noise is awful. I would do what a responsible pet owner. Inserted my finger and stuck together to figure out the reason for rocking around the effort. Began to walk out on this amazing sex scene with my wife. I, fingering my dog comes with me to my knees on the other one.
Useless. They were stuck stuck good.
So I explained the situation to call the vet. I walked in and said to do a response (no change), any phone, and as a result I have tried so far ladies. Get him a good woman. She asked me to repeat the story of the speaker minutes later came back. I was.
I was telling my story because while laughing his ass for half a dozen people in my misfortune to hear clearly all a big mistake she egeyi the entire office to collect her. When you get through my story, I once more ask for advice. Reply:
I know that does not look like it, but they're fun, they go. If it takes more than twenty minutes to throw water over them. They were able to touch a raw, my wife is not a lot of time to wash my hands until.
TL: DR, I finger my dog.
@marklog Past tense got lopped off in translation, now the Koreans will think you continue to do it to this day. Perfect.
@marklog This is great, there's so much material here but my favourite is the opening line, "When I met my wife she had two." It sounds like the start of a limerick.
"When I met my wife she had two.
And I didn't know just what to do.
'Til a stranger, quite nice,
gave me helpful advice,
'__________!'"
@Starblind So I stopped, and fingered him too!
@Thumperchick Oh wow, a million +stars if I could. Brilliant.
@Thumperchick You win the internet today.
@Thumperchick Brilliant!
@marklog: Reminds me of another story. Years ago when translation software was new, this phrase was translated into Russian: "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." What came back in English? "The vodka's good, but the meat is rotten".
@TaRDy they were stuck stuck good.
@TaRDy right, like the topic was 'what do you like to do for fun'
@marklog Thumbs up
Oh, I finally fingered it out.
This whole thread is mehvelous!
This is even better than the guy that Tased himself, although that one was pretty funny. No clue how to find that from Woot.
@pooflady http://www.woot.com/Forums/ViewPost.aspx?PostID=82757 :)
@jsh139 Thanks, that was great. Read the next few pages and some of them were pretty funny, too. A lot of old Wooters there.
@pooflady OMG ROTFLMAO (He writes really well too - much better than if there had been a video instead)
@jsh139 that's fantastic! I think we've all had those moments...