JonT is... Slipping

2

My fellow Amehricans:

May I present to you this thread. In it, I produce the glorious http://speakerdocks.net to be used every SDF. Seeing the amazing reference I have made and what is surely to become the regular domain name of meh @JonT guaranteed me two (2) speaker docks by the end of the year. I am writing you all today to reveal that it is now two business days after the new year, the mail has been delivered, and no speaker docks have shown up at my door at all. Now I get to be a pedantic jerk and complain that the free stuff I am to receive isn't coming fast enough. I encourage every Very Mediocre Person reading this thread to never come to the site again and cancel your memberships to force the hand of meh to meet the following demands:

1) 2 speaker docks at my door next week
2) $10 for the price of the domain name, plus any transferral fees if they want it.
3) A humble, thought out apology from @JonT, preferably with him and Irk sharing a video together on the main page with a length of approximately 2.5 minutes.
4) Gibe Kickstarter flair
5) Free VMP 4 Life

If these demands aren't met by the end of the month, I'll have no choice but to keep coming to this site every midnight to try and find a good deal on random junk as well as continue to subscribe to VMP because, let's face it, dat free shipping.

@JonT what are you doing with your life?!


If it isn't obvious for some reason, this is completely tongue in cheek and it's no big deal.

If I don't get goat for this post something is wrong with meh.