I told Siri she's useless. She responded appropriately...
21Saw a TV commercial this morning where a guy says, “Hey Siri, play me something new.” And Siri plays him a song.
Now, in my personal experience, Siri is bullshit.
Not only does she never do what you want her to, but she most often won’t do what they show her doing in the commercials.
So, I opened my Mac laptop, clicked on Siri and said, “Hey Siri, play me something new.”
Siri replied, “I’m not sure what you want to play.”
So I said, “You’re useless.”
She gave her little ‘I heard you’ chime and this song came on:
To be clear, this is the opening line of that song:
Hey now, hey!
HEY! Do you know what you are?
You’re an asshole!
Asshole!
I lol’ed.
Fair play, Siri, but why the fuck can’t you be that accurate and work that well when I ask you to for something???
- 6 comments, 13 replies
- Comment
you’re an all-star
Hey @mediocrebot Do you know what your are?
Are you sure your real name isn’t Bawwy?
KuoH
Yeah, Ask @mfladd about Siri and his butt plugs
@tinamarie1974 @mfladd
/giphy well we’re waiting
We were driving thru Cleveland, and from past experience knew we were close to several good steak places. So we asked Siri for a steak restaurant near us.
“I found one restaurant near you, Steak n Shake, it has 1.5 stars. Do you want directions?”
Now I have nothing against Steak ‘n Shake, if I want a burger and shake and one is close by I’ll pick that over McD or BK. But a) 1choice? (We asked google 2 seconds later and it found 5, none were SnS), and b) 1.5 stars for a reco? You have no filters?
@mollama I’ve been an Apple user since the early '90s, they’ve always had voice recognition and it has always been all hype w/ little function.
@mollama
FWIW, all the Steak N Shakes in the greater Cleveland, Ohio area closed. They want $10k USD for a franchise and promise $100k your first year.
/giphy not impressed
@eonfifty @mollama similar in STL, but not ALL of them.
@tinamarie1974
Hwat? I’m in STL and we have SnS out the ying yang. Unless you mean STL as in Seattle, which I cannot attest to.
@ked8517 nope STL, Mo. Several in N County and one in Fenton have closed. Did you not see the billboards on 44?
@tinamarie1974
44 is shadow land. We don’t go there. And even if a few closed, we have SO many. We can stand to lose some. It’s garbage food. The one by me can’t even give you what you ordered on any given visit. Wanted a burger? Oh, OK. Here’s a chili 3-way with whipped cream on it.
@ked8517 Um I don’t know I think Fenton is nice. And pretty much all in N Co are gone. I personally don’t eat fast food, but people like it
@ked8517 @tinamarie1974 the steak N Shake in my town Closed…14 yrs ago…(only open 6-7yrs). been sitting there vacant, and for sale, all of these years, with no maintenence, until last summer.
Suddenly the signs came down, there was a handyman there, cleaning, repairing, and painting for the better part of 2 weeks. after he finished, new signs from a different local realtor went up.
still for sale now. but these guys at least put up a website…
http://3165elida.com/
and yes, that price is right. it’s one of the main shopping corridors in the area, lots of (flowing) Traffic(PRIME commercial realestate). when Discount Tire went in( just a few doors down) about 3 years ago, they paid about $900k just for the undeveloped land.(albeit about twice the lot size of the steak N’ Shake…)
just realized they don’t have the price listed on that page… it’s $900k. (it was $850k a year ago…)
@earlyre @ked8517 well hopefully someone snatches it up. Empty storefronts appear as a blight on the area.
Your post reminded me to double check my memory. Looks like HALF of the St Louis locations closed. Seems MO and OH were hit the hardest by the chain. Here is a link to one of the many articles I found.
https://www.tagexbrands.com/single-post/2019/05/13/Steak-n-Shake-closes-half-of-St-Louis-locations-Whats-next
There’s literally no way that her response could’ve been intentional… The song title doesn’t contain any of the words I said to Siri, and I’m certain there’s no meta-data or anything containing the song lyrics (this was a song from my collection, BTW), and it was too quick of a response for Siri, even if she was capable, to have Googled songs containing the phrase “you’re an asshole” and cross-checked that against songs in my collection.
However, since my first iPod, a 2nd generation, there have been so many amazing synchronicities among the songs that came up while listening to randomized playlists, that I’ve been half convinced that iTunes devices can not only read my mind, but that they also have some level of sentience.
These coincidences have occurred too many times to count. The only one that sticks in my memory is the time a buddy of mine called me and said, “hey, I just picked up some pot. Come over and do some bong hits with me.”
To which I of course replied, “BRT!”
On the ride over there, with my iPod on full random, it played Ray Charles’ “Let’s Go Get Stoned” and Old & In The Way’s “Panama Red”.
I shit you not.
I wish I could remember the other instances, because I do remember that they were just as creepy.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
‘Here’s your playlist, s**thead’: Echo Dot owner claims Amazon’s Alexa assistant began SWEARING at him after he quit his Prime membership
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-7191711/Echo-Dot-owner-claims-Amazons-Alexa-assistant-began-SWEARING-quit-Prime.html
I’ve used an Alexa device a few times, and I have noticed there seems to be times when there is some human intervention involved. Maybe Siri gets similar help from her maintainers.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@eonfifty