Help, I've hurt my back!

@jbartus Thank you, doctor, please send the bill to @DMlivezey’s email addy.

@Barney honestly don’t rush it. The biggest mistake to make with an injury like this is to try to do too much too soon and end up re-injuring yourself. Better six weeks in bed than six months because you keep re-injuring it!

Focus on finding @jaremelz a new name, that should keep you occupied for a while. After that… start coming up with names for every shade of purple that can be represented in 24-bit RGB color codes!

@Barney @jbartus Am I missing an inside joke? Maybe that’s why it’s called an inside joke, and I am all alone

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I’ve had back issues and once took some of my kids drugs left over from when they had their wisdom teeth out. I don’t recommend it, I started getting really fuzzy in the head 12 hours later at work…

Hope you feel better soon…

@jbartus Wrong- after 6 weeks of bed rest, you’ll more than likely have a DVT* and/or PE**, and be so weak than you’ll injure yourself sneezing.

Instead- from my patient ed files:

Taking care of your back at home

A common myth about back pain is that you need to rest and avoid activity for a long time. In fact, bed rest is NOT recommended. If you have no sign of a serious cause for your back pain (such as loss of bowel or bladder control, weakness, weight loss, or fever), you should stay as active as possible. Here are some tips for how to handle back pain and activity early on:

• Reduce your normal physical activity only for the first few days. This helps calm your symptoms and reduce any swelling (inflammation) in the area of the pain. Get up and walk around for 5-10 minutes every 2 hours while awake to prevent blood clots, pneumonia, and increasing stiffness.

• Apply ice to the painful area. One good method is to use ice for 20-30 minutes at least 4-5 tines daily.

• Take over-the-counter pain relievers such as Aleve [naproxen sodium].

• Sleep in a curled-up, fetal position with a pillow between your legs. If you usually sleep on your back, place a pillow or rolled towel under your knees to relieve pressure.

• Do NOT perform activities that involve heavy lifting or twisting of your back for the first 6 weeks after the pain begins.

• Avoid exercise in the days right after the pain begins. After 2 - 3 weeks, however, slowly begin to exercise again (it’s helpful to get advice from a physical therapist). You can start getting back to regular activities after a few days.

Consider seeing a chiropractor or acupuncturist.

EXERCISE AND YOUR BACK PAIN

Exercise is important for preventing future back pain. Through exercise you can:

• Improve your posture

• Strengthen your back and improve flexibility

• Lose weight

• Avoid falls

A complete exercise program should include aerobic activity (such as walking, swimming, or riding a stationary bicycle), as well as stretching and strength training. Always follow the instructions of your doctor or physical therapist.

Begin with light cardiovascular training. Walking, riding a stationary bicycle, and swimming are great examples. Such aerobic activities can help improve blood flow to your back and promote healing. They also strengthen muscles in your stomach and back.

Stretching and strengthening exercises are important in the long run. However, starting these exercises too soon after an injury can make your pain worse. A physical therapist can help you determine when to begin stretching and strengthening exercises and how to do them.

Avoid these exercises during recovery, unless your doctor or physical therapist say it is okay:

• Jogging

• Contact sports

• Racquet sports

• Golf

• Dancing

• Weight lifting

• Leg lifts when lying on your stomach

• Sit-ups

PREVENTING YOUR BACK PAIN FROM COMING BACK

To prevent back pain, it is also very important to learn to lift and bend properly. Follow these tips:

• If an object is too heavy or awkward, get help.

• Spread your feet apart to give you a wide base of support.

• Stand as close to the object you are lifting as possible.

• Bend at your knees, not at your waist.

• Tighten your stomach muscles as you lift the object or lower it down.

• Hold the object as close to your body as you can.

• Lift using your leg muscles.

• As you stand up with the object, DO NOT bend forward.

• DO NOT twist while you are bending for the object, lifting it up, or carrying it.

Other measures to prevent back pain include:

• Avoid standing for long periods of time. If you must stand for your work, try using a stool. Alternate resting each foot on it.

• DO NOT wear high heels. Use cushioned soles when walking.

• When sitting for work, especially if using a computer, make sure that your chair has a straight back with an adjustable seat and back, armrests, and a swivel seat.

• Use a stool under your feet while sitting so that your knees are higher than your hips.

• Place a small pillow or rolled towel behind your lower back while sitting or driving for long periods of time.

• If you drive long distance, stop and walk around every hour. Bring your seat as far forward as possible to avoid bending. Don’t lift heavy objects just after a ride.

• Quit smoking.

• Lose weight.

• Do exercises to strengthen your abdominal muscles on a regular basis. This will strengthen your core to decrease the risk of further injuries.

Learn to relax. Try methods such as yoga, tai chi, or massage.

*Deep Venous Thrombosis.
**Pulmonary Embolism.

@PhysAssist bed rest doesn’t mean literally lying in bed constantly… it’s not literal o.O

@PhysAssist Tomorrow I have to go back to my normal routine. All I can do is take things slow and easy. Life goes on.

@harrison Yeah, sitting is very painful. This is day number two, I’m not going to make it…

@mfladd You are incorrigible.

@jaremelz It is a muscle strain. Doc said heat. It’s going to be pushing 100 degrees around here for the next week. Thinking about doing some nekkid sunbathing. Just thinking…

@Barney That’s always an option! But you do need a bit more intensive heat than that. Also, are you even able to take anti inflammatory meds?

@Barney Seriously, if there’s pain or swelling, it’s usually recommended to alternate cold & heat. Please confirm w/ your doc that they want heat ONLY (usually for muscle spasms or more chronic issues).

@jaremelz @compunaut I’ve got both my heat pad and ice pack. (I guess we’re going to become good friends in the next six weeks.) No, I can’t take anti inflammatory meds. -sigh-

@Barney That’s what I was afraid of. Dang it, you need some lovely buff folks to come do your bidding for a few weeks

@jaremelz +1 about the anti-inflammatory meds ^. It isn’t wise to offer medical advice being neither a medical doc nor knowing you, so the following is something to consider discussing with your doc. My experience with event-related back pain that sounds similar to yours is that my muscles/nerves back there become aggravated/inflamed. The discomfort does respond to ibuprofen and the like, which helps in both temporarily easing the pain and reducing the inflammation. My doc did not object to me starting with a couple of significant doses, to get ahead of the pain, and then back off to the recommended levels to keep the inflammation in check. It is possible that this kind of thing may help you, but it goes without saying that you should check again with your doc to see if any kind of anti-inflammatory med makes sense for you. Longer term, the answer to preventing this often seems to be strengthening the abdominal muscles so as to balance and support the opposing back muscles (e.g., doing sit ups of some kind), but that is for some other time when you are feeling better. Good luck.

Edit- sorry, you posted you can’t take anti-imflam meds while i was typing and didn’t see it until after.

@jaremelz good idea. @OldCatLady can you find me some buff young studs to appear at my every command and grant my wishes for the next six weeks. They need some muscle because I still have furniture to move and they also need to know how to cook and clean, mow the yard and, oh, do they do windows?

Also, have them bring a TENS unit with them.

@southpaw Yeah, I’m on heart meds, so the doc doesn’t want to screw them up. I guess I’ll just have to tough it out.

@Barney I’d need to interview them first, and make sure they were up to the job. Scheduling interviews now-.

@barney said “…nekkid sunbathing…” and then cow said

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I hope you can keep your purple happy spirits up

@Barney

I have yet to find a real guy who has muscles AND can cook well, let alone clean.

Sigh

@FroodyFrog My boyfriend comes pretty close to meeting all of the criteria, but he does need to work a little more on his cleaning skills.

@Barney

Meh. They’re still hard to find.

@Barney you can put the heat on the muscle injury and to counteract that put something cold elsewhere on your body. I did that only opposite when I had to have ice on all the time bc of my break. It was winter.
So they gave me heat pack to put somewhere far away from my leg. It worked !

Also eating ice cream and keeping the cold drinks coming – you want to stay nice and hydrated so w/o the alcohol ALL the time.

Can you work w/ a massage therapist ? One that does medical massage not spa.

/giphy Sorry you hurt

@ceagee As I said, it only hurts when I move. But the pain would probably go away if you sent me a truckload of ice cream from that place near you.

@compunaut yes and no.
you don’t want heat in the first 24-48 hours of most injuries, even if there is swelling, no, especially if there is. heat brings more of the bodies natural healing fluids to the site and therefore more swelling.
So in most cases, cold first, how long is debatable.
After that heat brings the things that help flush out the inflammation. The heat you get is not just because you hurt it, it’s because the body’s trying to fight the hurt.
If the doc says heat, he’s probably looking at the type of injury and wanting to make those natural anti-inflammatory agents work over time. And for the blood and lymph to carry the bad things away.

It’s the same reason you really shouldn’t treat a low grade fever, but let it run its course, because the fever fights the infection. Okay, I’ll get off my medical soap box.

If you use a heating pad, generally you don’t want to have it on all the time, you want 20-30 minutes several times in a day with gaps.

But best thing is do not do anything to make it worse. Cause it will.

@compunaut Agreed- or just ice to limit swelling and spasm.

@Cerridwyn @PhysAssist I think I’m going to bathe myself in ice cream and go to bed. Lying down does not hurt. Thanks for the advice.

@narfcake Yeah, where’s a good TENS unit when you need one?

@Barney Not at woot right now, that’s for certain.
/woot tens

5-Person Mountain Sport Tent for $99.99
http://sport.woot.com/offers/5-person-mountain-sport-tent

Wenzel Alpine 3-Person Tent for $39.99
http://sport.woot.com/offers/wenzel-alpine-3-person-tent-5

Sierra Designs Flashlight 2 Tent for $119.99
http://sport.woot.com/offers/sierra-designs-flashlight-2-tent-7

Wenzel 8-Person Klondike Tent for $129.99
http://sport.woot.com/offers/wenzel-8-person-klondike-tent-1

Timber Ridge 6 or 8 Person Deluxe Dome Tent for $69.99 - $89.99
http://sport.woot.com/offers/timber-ridge-6-or-8-person-deluxe-dome-tent-2

(The lack of purple explains the shittiness.)
/woot purple

@narfcake @Barney Your local -mart does have TENS units, and they are a whole lot better than nothing. You use them alternately with the heating pad. And next time meh has them, buy one! Ask your doctor’s office for a script, so you can take it off your taxes. It’s very possible that your insurance would reimburse it as medical equipment.

@OldCatLady I’m a thinking that a Woot-Off is coming up. Maybe I’ll get lucky they will have one. Thanks for the advice about the taxes/insurance write off.

@narfcake Pshh. I did that same search but deleted when all results were tents.

@narfcake @Barney Don’t wait for any woot-off; it could be weeks before you get your item. Drugstores and Wal-Mart have many TENS units for <$30. You might ask your doctor’s office which they recommend. I have three units, including the very nifty small one meh had, which is perfect for travel. Bigger is not necessarily better. Simple is good.

@Barney They had one last night.

@narfcake @Barney Not sure how all insurances work but I had a script for an TENS unit… You go to the Physical Therapy section of the hospital and they instruct you on how to use it (for your injury). You fill out the insurance card and it gets sent in while you take home the unit.

A month to 6 weeks later you get a letter saying Y or N on the insurance coverage and if it is NO then it will cost $_____ to keep or you can send it back. I called the agent and gave them a sob story on my income and got it for free!

@OldCatLady Voltaren gel should be an OTC like it is in most countries! The labeling is all kind of scary because it is for the oral (Tylenol (I believe)) version which is stupid!

@OldCatLady I’m taking notes.

@OldCatLady I prefer the term vintage

@OldCatLady 2+ for both of these- tho the gel is easier to use and more fun [soothing, I mean soothing] if someone can rub it in for you. …and the patches can be hard to keep in place- especially if sweating happens, and when doesn’t it?

@f00l I have a friend who goes to one for a badly damaged shoulder that was made worse after surgery. She comes up with the most amusing swear words for this person, but also loves them dearly for the relief and fast healing they’ve brought.
I’ve got two spinal surgeries under my belt. No worries, I am in excellent shape. I don’t let it mentally affect me, although every so often I’d kill for a proper massage to release the jacked up muscles. There’s likely another in my future, but hopefully I’ll be a grey haired, perverted biddy by then.

@jaremelz Well, you are halfway there…

@Barney I’m going to raise hell in the nursing home

@jaremelz A couple years back I began suffering from some pretty severe back spasms. Between chiropractic care and cryotherapy (and a little time) I was good as new fairly quickly. Might consider next time your back clenches up & won’t let go
/giphy chiropractor

@compunaut Believe it or not, chiropractors generally don’t like me. And i don’t like them. Had more than one say that with my hardware and physiology they don’t want to risk it. And the one who did, years ago, clearly did not know what to do wth me. Lots of moving parts mixed in with ones that don’t. A little over half my spine is fused, though you’d never know it to meet me and I will happily keep up with most at physically demanding stuff.
I just won’t be able to move for a few days, haha

@jaremelz My spine doc (www.spine-doc.com) won’t touch anyone who has been to a chiropractor. He’s fixed two separate back problems for me, and there is more fun in store.

@fjp999 I’ve been so very curious about those tables!

@fjp999 It’s just a good old fashioned lower back strain. I was trying to move a very old and it turns out, a very heavy, oak wall unit away from the wall to get to some cable connections behind it. I’ve learned my lesson, I will never do that again.

The good thing is that it only hurts when I move. Actually, it does not hurt when I am lying down, so I’ve got that going for me. And thanks for the purpleness.

@jaremelz Again, I spoke to my pain doc before getting one and recommend doing the same if you have any serious issues.

My doc asked me what I thought of yoga when I asked her about a Teeter table. I said I have always been interested but couldn’t do such complex positions.

She explained that such a table allowed one to do yoga like movements (and for me that is all about breathing).

They are advertised as easy to move but they are NOT. Also a bit complicated to put together. Once done they are built like a tank.

Go slow at first and ya don’t have to go upside down ever. My doc instructed me what I couldn’t do (side to side twist were a no-no for me) and some would have issues (heart patients) going all the way upside down.

Just teetering in a horizontal position is very relaxing.

There are a lot of very interesting YT vids going in depth on these tables.

Within a month my hip and knee pains had vanished and has not returned. If I have a stressful day/week I get back on the table for about 10 mins for a couple nites.

/giphy And All Is Good With Life

@fjp999 Oh goody, you can hurt your back trying to move the table that is supposed to help your back. Sounds like fun.

@OldCatLady Yes, Mother.

@OldCatLady if only some daily deal site sold them for cheap and called them robots…

@KDemo It’ll get better. It’s got to 'cause I don’t want to spend the rest of my life all stooped over and dragging my knuckles on the ground.

@Barney - That might not be so bad if you like gardening.

@KDemo Well, I guess I could go ahead and get the weeding done @carl669’s house.

@MrGlass I promise I will never attempt to lift/move anything heavy again. Cross my heart.

@Barney For the next few months, imagine the thing weighs 4x its weight when your thinking about lifting it Its not always weight, in fact people tend to hurt themselves on lighter stuff - theyre careful when moving things they know are too heavy.

But over time it will get better. I have experience, theres a reason they call me Mr. Glass

@Barney Try warm Epsom Salt baths, 10-12 minutes. The magnesium will help relax your muscles. It’s also good for stress relief. Not that you have any stress, I’m sure.

@heartny Nope, no stress here – none at all. (Note to self: Buy lots of Epsom Salts.)

@thismyusername Another note to self: Stop sneezing.

@brhfl Thanks, I sure hope it’s a lot quicker.

@glindagw Moist heat does sound pretty good. I saw the “biofreeze” and my first thought was that don’t think I’ll fit into the freezer. But hey, I’m willing to try anything to speed up the healing process, or at the very least to help get rid of a little of the pain.

Good to see you back!

@Barney FYI, Bio-freeze, icy-hot, ben-gay, etc, are all what are known as counter-irritants, all they do is distract your nerves from sending pain signals by triggering heat/cold sensations instead- sort of what TENS units do, but chemical instead of electrical.

They are useful to get some temporary comfort, but they do not actually speed up or affect the healing process- nor does the TENS.

@Barney I love ThermaCare wraps for continuous moist heat on my back. I could live in those suckers, except maybe in the summer.

@heartny ThermaCare wraps and ice cream…

@Barney Perfect. Just don’t put the ThermaCare wraps on the ice cream or it will melt

@looseneck Thanks. Hope you have no more back problems because they… suck.

@Barney Fortunately, no one pays attention to people in minivans, so your secret is probably safe.

@Barney Do’t pay attention to the person behind the wheel of the minivan
/image behind the curtain wizard of oz

@rockblossom That and the windows are tinted.

@Barney
/image minivan limo

@compunaut That’s my mom’s van, except it’s not a limo, not a Chrysler, (but it is a Dodge) and it’s not white.

@Barney - I just finished 3 weeks stuck at home with my arm in a splint. (Also stick shift). Luckily my neighbor made a grocery run a couple of weeks in, and I never resorted to ordering pizza.
Be careful Barney, and rest as much as possible, We all really want your back to heal.

@KDemo Staying home must have driven you nuts? I did manage to “clutch” my way over to Mom’s nursing home this morning, but the pain I’m having now, it was not worth it. I think I’m really going to go crazy… Heck, I’m talking to @mediocrebot and this is just the second day!

@Barney - TBH, not typing was the worst part (aside from the arm itself). Even after I figured out talk to text, it turns out there are some words I just can’t pronounce.

@KDemo So, did you break your arm in the final round of the National Karate Championship?

@Barney - Close. I was arm wrestling for beer.
Actually, multiple problems in my elbow and biceps tendon. Trying to avoid surgery, now going to occupational therapy. Again.

/giphy arm wrestling

@KDemo Ouch! And I take it that it is your dominant arm that is giving you all the problems?

@KDemo -snort- sorry, that is classic.
/youtube arm wrestling

@Barney So you didn’t get Voltaren, Flector or a drugstore TENS unit. Wow, you must be Superwoman! -and how is that working out?

@OldCatLady I only have pain when I sit, stand, or walk. I can lie down and there is no pain. I bought one of the Woot gel toppers a couple of years ago and I think this might be my best Woot purchase ever.

@Barney (-or drive-) I’m a slow learner myself. I get very indignant when a knee goes out or the lumbar spine seizes up etc. I used to be able to do anything and get away with it. I still keep thinking I can. Please take the time to care for yourself.

@OldCatLady I will, I promise.

@Barney

and it’s not white.

Is it… purple?

@brhfl Ha! Nope, looks like this:

It’s an oldie, but a goodie.

@Barney Well, blue is just purple that lost its red.