Go ahead, lay on the blame...
29
Well, it happened. I was just sitting at my desk, minding my own business, when suddenly I sprouted horns, and fur, and a tail. My totally-not-important opposable thumbs disappeared, and now I have what… hooves? Great.
Anyway, you all know the drill. Blame me for this, that, and the other thing. I’m not sure what fun goaty things I may or may not do this month, but if I get some entertaining blames, I’d like to do some silly little illustrations of me (the goat, above) apologizing while in the act of wronging you however I wronged you.
Now: spam my inbox!
- 51 comments, 129 replies
- Comment
P.S. - this is obviously my fault, @shawn, but when I tried to upload the above PNG from the ‘add topic’ box, I got a ‘you can only upload images’ error. I had to upload it from a comment reply box.
@brhfl I can’t reproduce it. Can you?
@brhfl damn you for not giving @shawn repro steps! bad software tester! bad! (and if you’re not a tester, it’s your fault for not being one.)
@shawn Interesting, I’m on my way out the door, but will see what happens on my home computer and report back…
@shawn Haven’t managed to reproduce from home, so either it’s something wacky with my gov’t computer that I totally wasn’t uploading goat drawings from, or else something odd with that file, or…
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
“Go(at) Ahead”
/giphy blame the goat
@brhfl I blame you for the food I got with the cool exterior hiding the molten hot lava center that burned the hell out of my tongue and is now making me miserable when I want to eat.
@RiotDemon
@brhfl
/giphy shakes fist at you
I blame you that my family is enjoying a wonderful vacation in MA and NY and that I am stuck here in MD due to work obligations. And now I do not want to drive up this weekend due to the possibility of acquiring road rage syndrome (RRS).
I should be enjoying time at the lake and it’s your fault!
@mfladd
@brhfl Customized art apologies? Nice job! I could get use to this
I’m blaming you that the parking brake cable on my wagon snapped last night – which was NOT good since my driveway is on a 20+% grade.
@narfcake I think I’d actually feel crazy guilt if I made a dumb illustration of this plight. How bad is the damage? When I had to park on a hill every night, that was always my nightmare… or more, I just constantly feared at night that I didn’t set the brake…
@brhfl Beyond that the brake handle smashed into the console cover, dislodging it, and that I’ll have to remove the seats/carpeting to unbolt the cable to replace, no real damage. A 4x4 block of wood is light/large/strong enough to toss under the rear wheel to chock it; I can’t rely on just leaving it in gear to hold under engine compression.
@brhfl i blame you for me having nothing to blame you for at the moment.
I blame you because my trashy neighbors have set up a 30 foot travel trailer in their driveway (with awning and popout), connected it to house electric, and I just got a letter from the homeowner’s association because my grass is too long. She’s on the board of the HOA, but did they get a letter? No. Your fault, goat.
@OldCatLady HOAs suck. Take pictures and use it for ammo at the next board meeting.
@narfcake The HOA has three members. She’s one, her mother-in-law (across the street) is the second, and one clueless spacewaster who’s been there for years. Not worth the time.
@OldCatLady what does your municipality say about trailers? County govt trumps HOA…
@tinamarie1974 Tuesday will bring a call to the city. Oh, and it seems that her husband is the sole member of the ‘architectural control subcommittee’ of the HOA, which can grant exemptions to the rules. At this point I’m hoping for a lightning strike. All that metal-.
/giphy trashy
@OldCatLady It happens…
http://winnipeg.ctvnews.ca/woman-lucky-to-be-alive-after-trailer-hit-by-lightning-1.2529129
@OldCatLady good luck. Ill cross my fingers…and my toes…ill throw in my eyes for good measure
@OldCatLady I’m… not entirely sure how I’d draw this one, but fuck HOAs… Sorry!
@brhfl There are two perfectly good trailer parks about a mile away. I guess they don’t want to live with trailer trash. (I used to live in a trailer, half a century ago, back when they were ‘mobile homes’ .)
@OldCatLady I like mobile trailer homes, they’re like the houseboats of the land.
@OldCatLady
Die, HOAs, Die!
@OldCatLady how the hell did they get such a monopoly on the HOA?! Maybe rouse the neighbors? That just ain’t right.
Aww, @brhfl, you are sooo cute!
@Barney
@brhfl I forgot to mention how talented you are, too.
@Barney Aw, thanks.
I blame you that I got where I was going for last night at 4am this morning, had to be somewhere at 8:30 and now have 8.5 hours left to drive. Where’s a teletransporter when I need one? Your fault they haven’t invented that yet for human use.
@Kidsandliz Are you there yet? Are you there yet?
@Kidsandliz
@OldCatLady Yes rolled in at 10:45pm last night. Still tired today but can’t be as we have a family picnic to go to before the family wedding tomorrow. Oh and I am even on the computer now because I am supposed to be working but had to check mail instead because my brain is too tired to work. And that is @brhfl 's fault too LOL (too bad blaming the goat doesn’t make me untired)
Why did you cause sporadic thunderstorms in Philly this evening, when the Mrs. and I were planning on shopping and eating our way through most of Rittenhouse Square?
@ACraigL That was predicted before today so I believe you have to blame @dashcloud.
@ACraigL
@brhfl Wow. You’re even awesomer than I though. You goat girl!
@brhfl I blame you for my being an ungrateful bastard today. Administration bought us pizza for lunch as we’re rather shorthanded, but the pizza was from a place we already knew would lose to Totinos in a pizza contest. Yeah, yeah, I should be thankful for free lunch. But I’m not. It sucked.
@cinoclav
@cinoclav
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/why-is-my-butt-warm-2
@brhfl Fan-fucking-tastic. I think I love you.
@brhfl
Congratulations!
And . . . um, I’m sorry?
@KDemo Thank you for the adorable acrostic in the goat-vote thread, btw!
@brfhl
I blame you for my being too lazy to go into the office on my off day today. I had a bunch of things to get done!
/image bunch of things
/giphy bunch of things
@compunaut
@brfhl Why did you make me feel so yucky today that I couldn’t go to Yankee Doodle Pops? I was looking forward to attending. (At least it was my day off so I didn’t have to feel yucky at work.)
@msklzannie
I blame you for being able to create customized art apologies and yet I STILL have no skillz! Damn you, GoaT!
@mfladd
@mfladd - I believe you may have just received the first Goat Calligraphy.
Historical collector’s item. Guard it closely.
@brhfl I blame you because it’s set to rain all this weekend and we’re moving to the new house.
/giphy welcome, goat!
@medz
@brhfl This going to be a very, very long month for you.
I have to blame you for my internet going from 75 mbps to 770 kbps on a Saturday morning before 7.
@looseneck
@brhfl I laughed too hard at this, thanks.
@brhfl Goatsim1.exe Lulz.
I blame you for all the chairs out days in advance of the parade getting in the way of my walking /running route
@CaptAmehrican
i was just prescribed medicine for high blood pressure, for the first time in my long life
, and the doc had the audacity to question my drinking habits,
/giphy "whiskey tango foxtrot?"
i blame you
@Yoda_Daenerys
I blame you for the free burgers at work being gross.
/giphy gross burger
@RiotDemon
@brhfl I must say that I am impressed that a goat can drive a forklift.
@brhfl I blame you for the drunk woman who accused me of racially profiling her at the hotel last night because I told her off for holding a loud conversation with her guy in the hallway for 15+ minutes at 2:30 AM… SMH
@jbartus
A few hours ago, I wanted to blame you for my restless sleep last night, but after my second “cup” of coffee, I’m still doing okay, so it’s a pass.
I will blame you if my email to @dave last night didn’t go through … but then, I’d also be unblaming you for the things that went right over the weekend … and it’s too early in the month to do that.
I blame @brhfl for the disappointment the August goat will bring. Custom goat artwork won’t be topped.
Okay, one unblame, @brhfl: my Cute of the Month shirt arrived today.
@narfcake
@brhfl Fucking goat, stealing my catshirt before I even wear it. GET YOUR OWN SUBSCRIPTION, DAMMIT!!
@brhfl - It’s adorable on you! So glad you didn’t take the cue and eat it.
@narfcake - Uh oh. Does that mean no more unblames?
@KDemo Maybe.
I blame @brhfl for not reminding me it’s mehs’ birthday already…
@brhfl, I blame you for the bears that distracted me from all of the goat magic happening over here. I could have been enjoying these goat apologies all weekend!
@christinewas
@brhfl - You’ve captured the bears so perfectly! Kudos, it’s just priceless.
@brhfl Ahhhhh! It’s perfect!
@brhfl I like this better than the real thing! Well done!
Not everyone blames goats. These guys seem to be deeply in love: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2016/07/06/goats-are-as-loving-and-clever-as-dogs-say-smitten-scientists/
@OldCatLady I love how much the goat scientist looks like the goat.
Well, thanks to you, @brfhl, my husband’s heart is broken. We just said goodbye to our almost 23 year old kitty.
He really, really doted on that cat. She slept with him, when she got up at night, he took care of her, made sure she had food…every two or three hours.
Last night, she didn’t get up once. This morning, she ate a tiny bit, then went outside and spent all day under the tractor. She came in, I gave her a can of tuna and she lapped it up for a little, then started sneezing. The past week she’d had a hard time eating and put her face into the food, getting stuff up her nose. Leaving the bathroom, she had a hard time staying balanced. I think her kidneys have finally shut down. Earlier this week the pee pad I had down for her in the bathroom was soaked and the fluid was clear. It didn’t appear as if it had been filtered at all.
She was diagnosed in kidney failure shortly after we got her from my mom, eight years ago. She’s been getting SubQ fluids twice a week. She had arthritis and it was getting more and more difficult for her to walk. Brian made steps for her. In the family room, up to “his” sofa and in the bedroom, curved steps up to his side of the bed. So, she could curl up with him.
It’s been a while since she spent time in the family room, but she had her spot on the bed. It’s going to be a huge adjustment for him. I think he loved her more than any of the other cats we have or have had. She was his special girl.
God speed Miss Elizabeth (my mom named her after Fred Sanford’s wife…my mom had a wicked sense of humor).
@lisaviolet
So sorry. It’s always difficult when it’s time to say goodbye.
@lisaviolet There are times that I find that my tears just won’t stop – this is one of them. I’m so sorry and please tell your hubby that I’m thinking of him.
Here’s a little video of her in April.
@lisaviolet Sorry to hear about your cat’s passing.
@lisaviolet Not going to trivialize this with a dumb drawing, but I am so very sorry. She looks like a real sweetheart. Not that it’s any consolation, but it sounds like you gave her a good, happy life.
@brhfl @Barney @dashcloud @christinewas
Thanks. We knew it was coming, we were surprised she made it to the end of last year. We knew she wouldn’t make it through the summer. One of the signs of dehydration is when the cat walks, s/he looks like s/he’s drunk. Fluids usually help, unless the kidneys are shutting down. Even though she got 120cc of lactated ringers, with potassium last night, she was stumbling so badly this morning. The fluids didn’t help her at all.
It was obvious that her kidneys were no longer filtering out the toxins from her system. It was time and we were ready. Well, I was more ready than Brian, but he’s the one who actually said it out loud earlier this week that he thought we’d be lucky if she made it through the week. When she was sedated, he was on his knees, his face against hers. He was sobbing.
It’s going to be a hard couple of years. The cats are aging out. Miss E is the third one this year and the year ain’t over.
Thank all of you for your kind words.
On our way home from the vet, Brian reminded me of this story. It’s a sad one, but it’s somewhat comforting.
http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=3589
@lisaviolet and Brian, I am so sorry for your loss. I have to say that while hearing about your kitty’s passing made me sad, my tears were more for the wonderful things done for her while she was still with you. The love y’all have for her jumped off the page. Thanks for being the type of people who take on an animal knowing it’s sick and treating her with such kindness and love.
/giphy blame shame
My daughter signed up late for the 24 hour swimathon so I got assigned to monitor the kids from 3 to 4 am. I am too old for this shit. I will be cursing you, @brhfl, for the entire hour.
@sammydog01 I’m at the fuckng pool at 3 fucking am for the fucking swimathon. Fuck.
@sammydog01
@sammydog01 what kids can actually swim for 24 hours straight?
@Yoda_Daenerys They take turns. 21 kids swam 15 minutes at a time over 24 hours.
@sammydog01
@brhfl - The beauty sleep obviously paid off.
/image beauty goat
@sammydog01 Shouldn’t that have included a ‘duck you’? Did they get a trophy?
@OldCatLady My daughter got pizza and a nasty cold. No trophies.
@sammydog01 Pizza is good, at least. Summer colds are the worst.
I blame you for the slightly disturbing screaming goat enema pinata video meh posted. (Ok i mainly want to see your cartoon of that)
@CaptAmehrican I’m… going to mull over that for a bit…
@brhfl I blame you for not being there to catch me with your thick fur when I feel the other day.
/giphy ive fallen can not get up
@juststephen
@thismyusername I meant fell the orher day, off of my scooter. Bashed my arm when I used it to guard myself and the, scooter landed on my foot/ankle. If I only had had a soft goat to land on…
@juststephen This falls squarely under the category of ‘shit I don’t really want to mock with a cartoon’, so I’m just gonna say… that super sucks, and I am super sorry it happened.
I’m blaming you that @acraigl printed today at shirt.woot and hasn’t posted about it here.
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/actual-size
@narfcake That one’s on me. I was away all weekend and just returned home to post. I knew I had placed, but was not able to post much of anything where I was.
But it’s a good weekend, for sure. Thanks!!
Accepting blame? @ACraigL for August goat!
@narfcake This is his shirt!! Def have to go get it now.
@ACraigL Order placed! Love this one.
@ACraigL I bought one. Dang, just as I had decided to cut back on my spending addiction. Bad goat, @brhfl. Congrats on the win @ACraigL!
@narfcake @Barney @mehbee Thanks! This community rocks!
@ACraigL @narfcake By my count, this design beat fourth place by just 1 vote! We may have pushed it onto the winner’s podium
/giphy winner’s podium
@ACraigL Hey,
congoatscongrats!@compunaut Yep; I called that out earlier in the main shirt.woot derby thread
@compunaut Yes!!! Every vote counts. Except in November. But otherwise, yes!
@thismyusername What a good dog
@thismyusername Oh my gosh, how super cugte. Wonderful thing to see on a Monday!!
I blame @brhfl that this site’s forums seem to be dying a slow and agonizing death. It’s like a morgue around here.
@mfladd You don’t think that it’s because it’s summer and people are on vacation?
@mehbee nah, I think we are in trouble
@mehbee I’m still here!
@mfladd That makes me sad
@juststephen But this makes me happy!
@mfladd I thought most of the activity was around midnight.
@RiotDemon Midnight? This isn’t Ghost Adventures.
@mfladd I just meant around product launch. Maybe it’ll be different with the new 8am and 4pm thing.
@mfladd Going on a ghost adventure might be interesting though.
@mfladd I’m making a birthday card and watching an old Denzel movie.
@whoever is listening, You kidz can drink the Kool-Aid all you want, but this forum is withering on the vine. I have have been a strong supporter and done everything I can to bring new people out - I want it to prosper. I like it here. But, it has been an uphill battle. This forum is supported by us the few - not, us the many.
@mfladd
@KDemo The reality sucks, I know.
@mfladd - Love you, @mfladd, no fighting. I’m just not as unhappy as you are here. The forum waxes and wanes. It’s Summer, it’s the weekend, many probably aren’t parked in front of their screens right now. As @RiotDemon mentioned, maybe the new schedule will make a difference.
You may have your gauntlet back.
@KDemo
This is not about fighting. I only speak about the reality here. This isn’t about the summer or weekends, but the fact that there a meager few that keep the lights on here in this forum. But I have said my peace and will now move on from this discussion.
Hey, @mfladd - was your pun intended? Because it’s really good.
@mfladd The card I made…
@lisaviolet Holy Shit! You have skillz!
@mfladd Thank you! I picked out the paper! And cut it and glued it!
You want to see skillz? http://www.svgcuts.com
That’s where “my” ideas come from. Mary is phenomenal with these designs. This card is part of a kit that has an actual working ferris wheel!
For all the talk of TVs today, I haven’t unblamed @brhfl yet that the 47" LCD with a blown fuse that I picked up a few weeks ago off the curbside is working now. Of course, $2 fuses blow for a reason, and this one was because of a $5 regulator chip and a $0.20 resistor. Dismantle, desolder, resolder, and reassemble. Nothing out of the ordinary, really.
I have yet to spring the $8 for a replacement remote, on account that it costs more than the now working TV.
@narfcake This is the best thing I’ve read all day! Congrats on your find!
@narfcake - Good going, @brhfl!!
@narfcake
Very cool!
@brhfl (grumbles)
Fucking goat! Back out to the curb, I guess …
My cat refuses to stop cuddling with me, despite the “too hot to be touching anything” temperatures. It seems wrong to be upset with her for being a sweet cat, so I’m sending the blame your way, @brhfl.
@christinewas
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/nothing-says-love-like-a-cat-hug-1
I blame @brhfl for making me leave my wallet at home today.
I had an appointment about 1 1/2 hours away from home in West Des Moines and didn’t discover the missing wallet until I was about to order lunch in Urbandale prior to the appointment. All I had with me were some gift cards and my checkbook, none of which would work at that particular restaurant. All my cash, my debit and credit cards, my driver’s license, and insurance cards were in the wallet I’d left at home. I was looking forward to Panchero’s, @brhfl!
Oh well, I did end up getting Outback which I had a giftcard and a coupon for $5 off.
Hey, @brhfl, why did you start making people so fucking rude? I went to a concert last night, went really early to set up our chairs close to the front. Right after the music started these two drunk middle aged chicks walk up front and stand in front of everyone sitting down. Yep, that 10 year old girl couldn’t see and that 6 year old boy moved his chair because your ASSES were in his FACE.
Then some twenty somethings came up next to me and started YELLING at each other because the music is too loud to talk normally. They YELLED across five feet for the entire set including the guy’s number 1 song until I went all old lady on them. Did your parents never teach you how to behave? This isn’t the county fair, it’s a CONCERT and I want to hear the MUSIC not two bitches SHOUTING.
Next time I’m going to stay home with my gramophone and keep the kids off my lawn. Except I got to look at this for an hour:
That’s one fine ass. Maybe I’ll try one more concert.
@sammydog01 You go girl!
@sammydog01 So just for my edumehcation, how old is ‘middle-aged’?
@compunaut 40ish because that’s halfway to dead, more or less.
@sammydog01 Eww… I’m past that.
Get off my lawn!
@brhfl Why have you made my 2 year old such a troublemaker today? Every time I try to do anything she has been naughty, and I have had to take care of what she has gotten into!
@brhfl - Welcome to the club, fucker.
I wanted to blame you for the heat wave here in SoCal (10:45pm, and it’s still 85 degrees), but between a great day at work, that my catshirt from TeeTurtle arrived in two days (in-house shipping now), and @mfladd’s “helping others” thread … well, have some unblames. You’re a good goat, @brhfl!
Blame for the evening: my credit union flagged my credit card for too much activity. Catshirtswoot has a woot-off today …
@narfcake I apologize, but that short story is eff’n funny
@narfcake Does your credit card have a cat-themed picture on it?
@mfladd It’s a laughable occurance. I actually thanked the CS rep in that it wasn’t something else serious.
@dashcloud Nope. No cats of my own anyway; just lots of catshirts.
I blame you for Tom Hiddleston losing an underwear modeling gig because of Taylor Swift. I could never see enough of that man in his underwear.
http://www.celebuzz.com/2016-07-31/tom-hiddleston-loses-armani-job-taylor-swift/
@sammydog01 sad.
@sammydog01 You may have noticed all of my people illustrations in this thread are just amorphous blobs with stylized at-signs for heads, so I don’t think I’m going to attempt to make anything of this one… but it is sad indeed!
Coming by to blame you for the last time, @brhfl. It’s so your fault that we were entertained with quirky imaginative personal goaty reactions. My animated birthday goat was extra special, thanks for a fun July!
@KDemo @brhfl Ditto! I love my swimathon illustration.
@sammydog01 - So funny!
Thanks, @KDemo & sammydog01 — I had a blast doing them, and now I have a folder full of oddly-specific goat drawings that will probably never come in handy again… but you never know!
@brhfl Maybe you can gift them to new goats
/giphy new goats
@brhfl - Well, they’d be perfect to include in your resume for your next scapegoat job.
What did my monthly blame/unblame ratio end up at?
@narfcake
@narfcake Enough to make me feel like I was doing something right!