FUCK YOU!! Again!
7Three minutes in and I still missed that damned Fuko…
Exactly how fucking fast did these go?
Wait… back to the main page
That’s $3228 total.
-145.75% of you didn’t bite before we sold out at 12:01 am ET.
FUCK YOU!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
How does that percentage of people who didn’t bite become NEGATIVE, even?! 0% is understandable, but… what is this shit?
- 22 comments, 27 replies
- Comment
/giphy you mad, bro?
In the words of the ancient mayans…sucks to suck.
You want a Fuko? Get Good, Bruh.
Is that what the kids say now? I don’t know. I’m so out of the loop.
@BillLehecka It’s “git gud, skrub.”
Three minutes after is like a lifetime for something like this. You have to be there right on the nose on you’re screwed.
@peaceetc Even right on the nose is too late a lot of the time! (Not for me, not tonight, but the point still stands.)
Alarm goes off on phone…
I “swipe” and turn off the alarm
(Laptop is always in front of me) I open new tab
I click on Meh shortcut
I click on “Buy”
I click I am not a robot
I click on “OK, let’s do this”
I get some cool cryptic phrase that lets me know it is real
@Veloslave almost identical…
laptop is right next to me but lid is closed.
open lid and meh page is there.
click “Buy” then freak out! that they are still available.
notice that I have to check the “not a robot”.
the meh gods have blessed me a second time with some crazy shit!
/youtube crazy shit
3 minutes in is 2 minutes and 40 seconds too slow. And that’s YOUR PROBLEM, not meh’s. So FUCK YOU.
FWIW, I did not get one. And life goes on.
You just need to get there at the exact time it turns over.
I’ve always thought that Fuko type bags should be limited to those who actually bought something from meh in the recent past. Then you would reward and encourage buyers and get rid of a lot of the leeches who only buy the lucky bags.
@madoka Hey! Leeches is a pretty strong word.
@madoka I could get behind this.
@madoka I’d say that is a reasonable thing. In fact, I’d be behind limiting them to people who have purchased at least one thing since the previous fuko|u. (Of course, this is easy for me to say, as I’ve averaged less than 13 days between purchases.)
Meh I am displeased
@Dizavid Karma sucks.
/giphy karma sucks
HOW DO I KNOW WHEN THE NEXT ONE IS COMING UP PLEASE HALP
@lanehammer
Easy peasy… CHECK EVERY DAY AT MIDNIGHT EASTERN
@thismyusername well crap, I must know what this bag contains. Looks like I can at least get groceries with it. Goodbye hobbies, I’ll just be trolling meh.
@lanehammer You don’t. Many of us who have been here long term often have ideas of when they’re coming generally, but we never know in advance. If it’s been a while since one has been sold, you just commit to being here every single night at midnight for a chance. Once it’s over, you can relax for a little while.
@lanehammer good, this place needs more trolls for sure…
@lanehammer You get a feeling.
My personal reasoning for this fuko was this:
Meh’s birthday is tomorrow. Today is the anniversary of day zero. Geek crowd. We count starting with zero. Makes perfect sense.
(I’m speaking with full 20/10 hindsight, of course.)
@baqui63 AND Meh’s actual birthday would have fallen on a weekend day if they celebrated it on the actual day.
Well fuck you tiny dick bastards
@melvinelder
I really don’t understand the people who complain bitterly about not getting the fuku|o and yet freely acknowledge that they aren’t really trying…
It is simple:
Ways to make it harder:
Ways to fail completely:
There may be other ways that work. Feel free to argue, but I can state from personal experience that my methods work (100% success rate to date).
(Also, I know… Fuck Me. Whatever…)
@baqui63 Does refreshing a couple of minutes before really help? I’ve never had a new item load early, but I’m willing to believe that it can.
@baqui63 I break all the rules. I always use a phone, and my chrome tab count has been at smiley face for weeks now. Also was alerted by the tweet text today rather than being in for changeover. Still mine is success!
@mossygreen he’s saying you set yourself for success by obsessing over it and refreshing frequently to account for clock mismatch.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@jbartus Ah. Thank you for being clear without being condescending!
@mossygreen that’s one of my goals when I get out of bed every morning. Clarity without condescending!
@baqui63 On the Fukos/Fukus, I’ve used my phone about 60% of the time. Then again, I have a top of the line phone.
@baqui63 I just wish I could afford to miss the sleep in order to do this. … Instead I try and find the pics of the crappiest fukus and laugh at those ppl while patting myself on the back and also deep down still secretly wishing I had received a bad luck bag.
@mossygreen These are simplified instructions, allowing for time discrepancies.
I personally run all my computers (well over 3500 of them, if we include the ones at work) sync’d to the official US gub’mint time. Thus, my home computers are fairly close to meh.com time. Given that too late is FAILURE and missing by more than 20 seconds or so is LIKELY FAILURE, I figure getting started 2-3 minutes early is good.
However, there is another reason: focusing on doing the F5’s makes it that much harder to get distracted by stuff. I’m not officially ADD or ADHD or whatever (such things didn’t really exist when I was a kid), but I am easily distracted by just about everything and have learned various ways to cope with my mental aberrations.
In case anyone wants instructions on configuring their computer to use official US (or other) time, Macintosh (OS-X) users can click here and Windows users can click here. A list of time servers is available here.
And yes, you would be correct to presume that ALL of the clocks in my home are set to just about the same time. (It took over six months to tweak my ancient German cuckoo clock to not gain or lose more than five seconds a month, after which I stopped using it because it annoyed my girlfriend. Sigh.)
@jbartus Dammit! You said (most of) what I did in sooooo many fewer words.
@baqui63 So it goes. Personally, I sync with Google’s time servers personally, prevents 2FA mismatch issues.
I love that people get upset at missing out on a Fuko. A Fuku I can see, but a Fuko? Do you really need a repair manual for a 1968 Dodge Dart, a slightly warped Engelbert Humperdinck: Live in Japan album and a theatrical poster for the Judge Reinhold film Vice Versa (easily the worst of the late 80’s trio of child-in-an-adult-body movies along with Like Father Like Son and Big) that bad?
The Fuko seems more like Meh’s answer to @Snapster asking, “How do we avoid having the warehouse filled with garbage without actual paying for a waste management service?” The Fuko is quite literally a digital dumpster dive. The truly brilliant thing is that Meh are completely upfront about this and yet people are furious they missed an opportunity to purchase an item advertised as “you will regret buying this”.
I know it’s said that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, but that man is usually wearing five coats and pushing a shopping cart while mumbling to himself about how Aliens are using stoplights to read his thoughts.
@Superjimtendo I got a framed photo of Captain Kirk in my Fuko. I sent it to a friend who adores Kirk, and she was thrilled. The good captain now hangs out with a couple of Barbie dolls on a shelf, which seems quite fitting.
To answer your question while (almost) neatly sidestepping your entitled BS, the “didn’t bite”/site visit stats don’t update fast enough to keep up with a fuko sellout. Basically the sale is over before meaningful traffic stats have been logged.
This is probably because @shawn, @katylava, @harrison and team have put so much work into optimizing the purchase handling process under the extreme load of fuko sales that real-time transaction processing trumps less important things like logging site visits when load is high. Sales lasting longer than a minute have plenty of time for stats to make sense.
@dizavid and now you’ve gone and made them change the statistics!
@Dizavid Didn’t you get a freebie?
In Cali helping family. Used to checking at 11p central…check at 11p Cali…I’m fracked. Well MEH! Good night
/giphy screw it
Clam down man!!! Don’t be so rude…
Never got a fuko, but as one who bagged a fair number of Bags of Crap from Woot, you most likely don’t want one. Unless you really enjoy the feeling of disappointment.
Really, the only thing more disappointing than not getting one, is when you open one. Yes, there’s a great rush when you are able to grab one, and beat the slow of reflex or the slow of mind.
But then there’s the interminable wait for it to be delivered.
Followed by the frustration, possibly even irritation, as others report their deliveries, but you’re still waiting.
Then the question is, do you read their opening reports for a hint of what’s coming, or remain spoiler free to preserve the mounting sense of anticipation^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H disappointment?
Finally, yours arrives, long after everyone else’s, it seems.
You rend the packaging to obtain your priceless loot, and…
meh.
Really, don’t bother unless you really cherish disappointment.
@blaineg Depends on ones POV, I guess.
Having gotten upwards of 80 BOC (I’ve stopped counting, could be close to 100 now) and all the fuku|os (I think anyway, certainly all that I’ve tried to get), I can say that I’ve NEVER been disappointed by a fuku|o and fewer than five of the BOC have been disappointing.
I personally don’t use/enjoy/want all of the items, but someone does. People at work and other friends have gotten various things that they’ve loved or needed (eg. girl at work who needed diapers for her kid was grateful for the slightly used package I got in a BOC).
Probably my best BOC item was an unopened 79 piece stainless flatware service for 12 with steak knives and serving utensils… got it a month before attending a wedding and they are still using the set. But there have been dozens of good things, as well as some things that went into the garbage.
My best fuku|o item in terms of fun was an unopened Syma X-1 drone though I have gotten way more compliments on the creepy baby body which is still standing in my office at work.
@blaineg That’s pretty much on point, and yes you should expect to eventually be disappointed by your fuko. But it’s not the disappointment that I cherish, what makes fuko fun is that it’s a gambling game. For $5 you get to play for bragging rights that you won a fuko and the remote chance that your particular fuko might include something really good. But most only get junk and end up thinking “Why did I pay $5 for this?”. The point is it’s fun for a while and doesn’t cost much, especially if you’re a VMP. Except for that fucking April fools fuko from captcha hell, which was downright evil.
Agreed, though I think it really is just the want of something you can’t have, and don’t even know for sure what it is. I myself have never gotten one but it hits a trifecta of buttons that make me want one. Getting mail, a surprise, and that faint chance of it being something super cool. But I lack to dedication to get up at midnight and check every single night, so alas no soup for me. My opinion on the bags can be summed up by a quote from one of my favorite books,
"But, in truth, it had not exactly been gold, or even the promise of gold, but more like the fantasy of gold, the fairy dream that the gold is there, at the end of the rainbow, and will continue to be there forever - provided, naturally, that you don’t go and look."
Terry Pratchett, Going Postal
Its a wishful dream precisely because I have never managed to get one.
Mildly PO’d and mildly amused I didn’t get one. Again. Oh fucking well.
Or, in the immortal words of Spock: “After a time, you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing, after all, as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true.”