Compilation of all of yesterday's Hallmehrk movies

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24

Part 1

Estelle is the socialite heir to a Meh shirt fortune worth twenty-four bucks. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Hohocus, New Jersey, where an encounter with a handsome stable-boy who spends his free time fishing nickels out of the mall fountain just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Prickly Christmas.

Ever since Penguin became a high-powered penguin hugger in the big city of Penguinopolis, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet penguin finds an ancient Cat Butt coloring book that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Penguinette at his hometown’s famous Christmas penguin hugging festival? Find out in… Penguin Colony For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, Rage 2 Viral? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Bob, who’s tired of making Crafting with Cat Hair Paperbacks and has run off to pursue a career in engineering. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry engineer portrayed by none other than Jean Claude Van Damme. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Box.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Fog Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the * Peacock Alley 200TC Mantra Percale Sheet Set* factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for baseball player Johnny Quest. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Rebecca, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a weaver to work as a waitress at the local Thai restaurant–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in… All I Desire For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Kim Miller just took home first place at the annual holiday hockey competition, winning a lifetime supply of US Patrol Wireless Watchdogs. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a Honda Pilot. But when she finds rustic drifter Ian Miller hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Lake Orion so that he can perform “Ms. New Booty” for an audience of engineers at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Princess!

Dolly Parton is the socialite heir to a tortilla blanket fortune worth $1. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Whoville, where an encounter with a handsome dentist who spends his free time bowling just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Beautiful Christmas.

Ever since Lukas became a high-powered artisanal importer in the big city of Beirut, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet mollusk finds an ancient Philips Multi Chopper that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Lucinda at his hometown’s famous Christmas world’s fair? Find out in… Basement For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, Naked Singularity? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Broseph, who’s tired of making Coleman 18-Piece Camping Kits and has run off to pursue a career in pastamancery. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry caddy portrayed by none other than Bruce Campbell. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Celery Stick.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Hazy Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the Instant Regret Kit factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for reality star Drake Tungsten. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Clarice, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming an avant garde sculptor to work as a waitress at the local Japanese restaurant–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in, All I Desire For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Amanda Hugandkiss just took home first place at the annual holiday extreme snowballing competition, winning a lifetime supply of protein powder and blender bottles. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a horse and buggy. But when she finds rustic drifter Michael Roch hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Houston so that he can perform “Ice Ice Baby” for an audience of today’s youth at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Highness!

Cortana is the socialite heir to a tactical LED flashlights fortune worth a bajillion dollars. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Thumperton, where an encounter with a handsome floor sweeper who spends his free time filling out dumb surveys just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Huge Christmas.

Ever since George became a high-powered mortician in the big city of Tampa, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet bear finds an ancient UV light sanitizer boxes that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Shirley at his hometown’s famous Christmas wedding? Find out in… Water Park For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, The Rutles? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Persephone, who’s tired of making MagicMount Pro Magnetic Fast Charge 10W QI Charging Mounts and has run off to pursue a career in politics. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry astronaut portrayed by none other than Jesse Ventura. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Volcano.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Cold As Fuck Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the BravenWaterproof Rugged Portable Bluetooth Speaker factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for meteorologist Hugh Jass. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Karen, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a painter to work as a waitress at the local Argentinian restaurant–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in, All I Desire For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Violet Chu just took home first place at the annual holiday chess competition, winning a lifetime supply of JetPak Apple Watch Dual Power Banks. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a Prius. But when she finds rustic drifter Tommy Tachibana hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Tokyo so that he can perform “Cursed Night” for an audience of deadbeats at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Reaper!

Chloe is the socialite heir to a putty fortune worth 5 dolla. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Wonkatania, where an encounter with a handsome cattle prodder who spends his free time eating Christmas cookies just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Pointy Christmas.

Ever since Dude became a high-powered s-mart employee (housewares department) in the big city of Dunk City, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet chihuahua finds an ancient cotton robe that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Lady at his hometown’s famous Christmas the event? Find out in… General Store For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, Love Katana? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Fabblestabble, who’s tired of making Studio Dry Microfiber Turbans and has run off to pursue a career in proctology. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry dancer portrayed by none other than Matthew Perry. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Kite.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Rainy Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the Instant Regret Kit factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for movie star Chad Chadington. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Susan Smiley, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a musician to work as a waitress at the local brewery–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in, All I Need For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Glinda Goodenough just took home first place at the annual holiday combat knitting competition, winning a lifetime supply of Ideaworks Stretch Chair Covers. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a bejeweled skiff. But when she finds rustic drifter Tank McNurple hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Fugging, Austria so that he can perform “Dirty Work (Steely Dan)” for an audience of the lightly disaffected at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Emeritus Princess!

Hollboll is the socialite heir to a bluetooth earbud fortune worth -$200. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Mediocreville, where an encounter with a handsome penguin nanny who spends his free time sleeping just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Awesome Christmas.

Ever since curtise became a high-powered cannoli filler in the big city of Toronto, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet alpaca finds an ancient iHome Color LED Swivel Lamp with Wireless Charger that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Veronique at his hometown’s famous Christmas garage sale? Find out in… Chocolate Factory For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, The Front Porch String Band? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Todd, who’s tired of making bluetooth earbuds and has run off to pursue a career in medical. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry astronaut portrayed by none other than Gary Busey. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Chopstick.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Raining Cats And Dogs Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the pineapple pool float factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for v-tuber Bart Finkelstein. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Mary Chowderbus, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a Olde English rapper to work as a waitress at the local *taqueria *–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in, All I Neeeeeeeed For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Donna Summer just took home first place at the annual holiday football competition, winning a lifetime supply of Ranger Ready Insect Repellent Spray Bottles. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a Chevy. But when she finds rustic drifter Richard Troy hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Chicago so that he can perform “Slide” for an audience of homies at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Prince!

Curteese is the socialite heir to a putty fortune worth 43 doubloons. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic Unfriendlyville, where an encounter with a handsome Cake Wrecks de-icer who spends his free time spelunking in sewer pipes just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Bodacious Christmas.

Ever since Bob became a high-powered aardvark handler in the big city of Bloomington, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet ferret finds an ancient Set of Salient Borosilicate Glass Food Storage Containers that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart betty at his hometown’s famous Christmas circumcision? Find out in… Over The River And Through The Woods For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, The Squishy Graves? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Lopothecary, who’s tired of making Dinosaur Egg Slimes and has run off to pursue a career in pants inspection. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry bedazzled cup tester portrayed by none other than Yahoo Serious. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Fart Muffler.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Foggy Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the Instant Regret Kit factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for reality star Jim Buckwheat. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Sally, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a artisanal artist to work as a waitress at the local Italian restaurant–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in, All I Desire For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Suzy de Bloem just took home first place at the annual holiday field hockey competition, winning a lifetime supply of Mophie PowerStation Keychains. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a Yugo. But when she finds rustic drifter Danny vandermer hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Antwerp so that he can perform “Three Little Birds” for an audience of musicians at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in, Christmas with a Highness!

Big Bertha is the socialite heir to a pressure cooker fortune worth 69¢. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic *Freedonia *, where an encounter with a handsome nerf herder who spends his free time chewing bubblegum and kicking ass just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Hairless Christmas.

Ever since Rock became a high-powered sewer waiter in the big city of Lompoc, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet quadruped finds an ancient air fyer that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Fleslie at his hometown’s famous Christmas sock concert? Find out in… Mesa For The Holidays.

Is that Santa? Posing as a new member of famed musical group, Bowling Ball Bar Room Brawl? You better believe it! But he’s not here for stardom. He’s traveling the country trying to find his head elf, Smeggie, who’s tired of making INFUSE Chamomille-Infused Aromatherapy Memory Foam Pillows and has run off to pursue a career in enbiggeneering. But there’s one thing no one considered: a sultry professional professor portrayed by none other than John Delancie. Will Santa return his head elf to the North Pole in time to save Christmas? Find out in… Rocking Around The Christmas Can.

You wouldn’t expect to see a celebrity in the quaint hamlet of Sleety Junction. After all, it’s never been the lap of luxury, especially since the Flexiglo Flexible LED Flashlight factory shut down. But that makes it perfect escape for televangelist Ricardo. He’s tired of the hustle and bustle of the big city and just wants to spend the holiday somewhere quiet. But when he meets Karen, a single mom who’s set aside her dreams of becoming a pole dancer to work as a waitress at the local greasy spoon–well, let’s just say, he might extend his stay! Watch the sparks fly in… All I Lust For For Christmas Is You!

Famed athlete, Britney Spears just took home first place at the annual holiday water polo competition, winning a lifetime supply of Bellapierre Hand Sanitizer. The only problem is she has to transport them home herself! So she has no choice but to rent a *unicycle *. But when she finds rustic drifter Brad hiding out inside trying to hitch a ride, will she cast him out? Or will she give in and take him to Las Vegas so that he can perform “Hit me baby one more time” for an audience of looters at the annual Christmas concert? And is he really a drifter? Or is he undercover royalty, looking for love? Find out in… Christmas with a Dutchess!

Brittany is the socialite heir to a smart watch fortune worth 3.5. The only thing standing between her and her inheritance is a Christmas trip to idyllic McMallenville, where an encounter with a handsome boat dryer who spends his free time washing cats just might uproot her big city dreams in… A Very Amazing Christmas.

Ever since Funky Fred became a high-powered secret agent in the big city of Houston, he’s just been too busy for the Christmas spirit. But that all changes when his rambunctious pet pangolin finds an ancient Miko Ugo Portable Flexible Massager with Heat that was apparently constructed in Santa’s workshop. Still, will it drive him to finally propose to his estranged high school sweetheart Funky Fredrica at his hometown’s famous Christmas end of the world as we know it? Find out in… Under The Sink For The Holidays.

To be continued…