Plus, I need to watch that movie again. It seemed so scandalous. Of course even the bean scene was taboo and scary hilarious to my then ten-year-old church-bred mind. Let's not even speak of the zipper sound effect.
First off don't use frosted pop-tarts - get the plain ones (if you can find them anywhere) - then toast and butter away! I grew up with Raspberry pop tarts done just that way, now however I can't find them so I go with Blueberry. Mmmmm Butter!!
@ThatsHeadly Yes, BSC. Toasted until it starts to turn a little brown. Real butter. Eat it while it's still almost too hot. Damn, now I miss Pop Tarts.
@ThatsHeadly I've tried someone's gf Pop Tart imitation and it tasted like cardboard. I'm still hopeful for someday having a good one. My wife doesn't like for me to eat too much of this shit anyway. She doesn't forbid it (not her thing). Honestly, a lot of this kind of product in the gf space is a combination of so bad and so overpriced that it's rarely worth trying. We do however have a few local bakeries that do fresh gf (some are even paleo) pastries: still overpriced, but totally worth it. In any case, thanks for thinking of me. :-)
Any of the fruit flavored, unfrosted pop tarts, with a nice pat of Kerrygold salted Irish butter. Frosted are great, but the butter makes the unfrosted ones awesome.
And after the episode "Into Harmony's Way" aired, I took a brown sugar cinnamon Pop-Tart, toasted it, and smeared a pad of butter on the crust side, not the frost side. I can tell you I was pleasantly surprised. It was so freaking good! The crust begins to resemble an actual pastry. It's incredible. So you absolutely have to toast it, eating butter on a cold Pop-Tart is not the way to go.
@vvedge This is exactly the way I grew up eating them -- Brown sugar cinnamon flavor, toasted, then flipped to the back (which is concave) and buttered, so that the butter melts and pools and soaks in.
Strawberry Frosted Pop Tarts have to be the greatest junk breakfast food ever made. Well unless you count actual Rice Krispie Treats as a breakfast food....then the Pop Tarts are a distant second! Why would anyone mess with perfection and add something unnecessary to it?!
@joelmw There is at least one other joke on collective nouns, and I think it's better: what do you call a group of school administrators? A Lack of Principals.
@ThatsHeadly I love that movie (although it was apparent on later viewings that it was also designed to provide an extended time in an air conditioned theater).
Diary of Shame, day 1. The husband and I just split a package of frosted strawberry with butter on the other side. The feeling is.... not altogether unpleasant.
@KDemo yep. Weird. I deleted that post because it has the wrong video by you were able to reply to it. I was surprised that it let me change it so I did.
I love strawberry and blueberry Pop Tarts, and so does my hubby. I think butter would be a bit much on the frosted ones, but I imagine it would be pretty good on the unfrosted kind.
@jbsegal I just bought 10 boxes of pumpkin pie Pop-Tarts at Target for $2.08 a box. That should hold me until fall. And those were 12 packs (usually $2.99).
When I was a boy, all Pop-Tarts were unfrosted. Toasting and buttering was they way they were meant to be eaten. The addition of frosting ruined Pop-Tarts for me. Last I checked, the only ones you can still get unfrosted are strawberry and blueberry. Fortunately, those two were always my favorites.
There's not enough butter in the world to improve the flavor of the new Peanut Butter & Jelly Pop Tarts. The Human Eating Machines which are my twins noped out of them and that says a lot. They even tried freezing a pack--yeah, frozen frosted Pop Tarts are a thing in my house. Bleah.
I'm now reminded of Last Tango in Paris. To Irk and his lover @pepsiwine, get your camera and remake that iconic scene from the film and share with us all.
"If you find something you love, and it is either inanimate or consenting, by all means try it with butter." Best line EVER from an Ask Irk to date. Way to go!
I'm trying to picture the 25% of the time butter doesn't improve what you're eating. You slathered butter on your...butter, maybe? And the effect was negligible?
@matthew@Trask On a somewhat related note: FWIW, my wife has started putting butter (the Kerrygold @duodec mentioned) in our coffee. Pretty good stuff.
Pop tarts? Like Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera ? Not a fan. I have no knowledge about added butter, and I very much prefer to remain in ignorance, thankyouverymuch.
I once made homemade pop tarts. Using twee preserves. They were awful and terrible, but worse, they were pointless. No butter, not even butter churned of milk from the silky mammaries of free-range virgins, could have saved them, not even if the butter had been salted using the tears of a weeping Madonna statue.
But this thread is the first I've ever heard of buttering pop tarts. I'm not sure I'd try it, unless they come out with lobster pop tarts and the butter is melted.
Pop-tarts are like bungee jumping... always seem like a brilliant idea while I'm standing in queue. But once I'm in the middle of it... I wonder "WTF was I thinking?". Still, somehow I always seem to forget... Pop-tarts are somewhat akin to roofing shingles. So as I'm wandering down the aisle at the local grocer's and I see those Brown Sugar Cinnamon 'tarts and hear them calling to me... I'm powerless to resist their charm. I guess it's like looking at that gorgeous bird across the table from you through the bottom of a pint, only to wake up next to Dame Edna.
I love butter so damn much. I love to cook, I think 'fat' is the 6th flavor and it's one that I utilize as damn often as I can.
You know what makes most restaurants "fine dining"? Butter & cream, my friends…butter & cream.
I never tried butter on Pop Tarts, but there's no way that butter wouldn't make them better. Like many of you I was also a huge fan of Irk's endorsement to "try it with butter".
Oh, and as a kid I totally snuck a few scoops of butter with a spoon every now and then.
@JonT@Thumperchick My wife says that if you're eating the right butter it's actually a very healthful thing to do. And I totally believe her, especially when it comes to this. But, owing to my maladies, she knows about this kind of shit (because the alternative is my knowing and pfft on that).
@joelmw Butter is definitely good for you - especially grass fed, etc. It's not the idea of what it is, but how it tastes on it's own. It's too rich for my brain to allow me to just... eat it, lol.
I did eat a good number of Pop Tarts, but soon switched over to Toaster Strudels, which would generally still taste good even if I burnt them a bit or left out the frosting. Some good things to try here with Pop Tarts though, so I'll probably get some again.
Okay so this Family Guy episode where there buttering their poptarts has blown up, but I remember back in the day there was a movie where a child I believe had been buttering their poptarts it’s driving me crazy because of that movie is why I started buttering my poptarts but I can’t remember what movie it was in. I feel like it was Pauly Shore in Encino Man or Punky Brewster, or something I remember the kid having tons of friendship bracelets on and it popping up and the butter going on the poptart. Can anybody who’s older help me out with this I need to know!!!
Strawberry pop tarts!
@kanzatonian Blueberry with frosting (no butter)!!!
I feel a need to buy my weight in junk food now
That can't be how that name is pronounced.
@belowi used to be @Headly but I updated it.
@ThatsHeadly I always get the wrapped one.
@jrwofuga Right as usual sir.
@ThatsHeadly You mean to evoke that Headly. So much more of what you've said makes so much more sense now. Nice.
And welcome to Ask Irk Unanonymous, That-She-Addly bro.
@joelmw My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
@ThatsHeadly I have that problem.
Plus, I need to watch that movie again. It seemed so scandalous. Of course even the bean scene was taboo and scary hilarious to my then ten-year-old church-bred mind. Let's not even speak of the zipper sound effect.
@joelmw Oh, it's twue. It's twue. It's twue, it's twue!
"They said you was hung."... "And they was right."
Consensual buttering. This is what Irk taught me today.
@Thumperchick interestingly at my supermarket the butter is adjacent to the isle with the "adult lotions". Coincidence?
@Thumperchick Me too. I now know that non-consensual buttering is not ok.
He's into butter stuff
@matthew Who isn't?
@matthew Did Irk just watch Last Tango again maybe?
@Thumperchick You must be a young person to not know about consensual buttering.
@joelmw Never too old to learn a new trick.
@Thumperchick All of this talk of tarts and tricks. I think Irk did it on purpose. Always the provocateur.
First off don't use frosted pop-tarts - get the plain ones (if you can find them anywhere) - then toast and butter away! I grew up with Raspberry pop tarts done just that way, now however I can't find them so I go with Blueberry. Mmmmm Butter!!
@ilovereality I was thinking BSC. (Brown sugar cinnamon)
@ilovereality Butter the apple Pop Tarts and then sprinkle with cinnamon sugar. It's dessert for breakfast. I miss eating crap like this.
@ThatsHeadly Yes, BSC. Toasted until it starts to turn a little brown. Real butter. Eat it while it's still almost too hot. Damn, now I miss Pop Tarts.
@joelmw You could try some of these: http://www.amazon.com/Glutino-Gluten-Toaster-Pastry-Strawberry/dp/B00C1W77W4
@ThatsHeadly I've tried someone's gf Pop Tart imitation and it tasted like cardboard. I'm still hopeful for someday having a good one. My wife doesn't like for me to eat too much of this shit anyway. She doesn't forbid it (not her thing). Honestly, a lot of this kind of product in the gf space is a combination of so bad and so overpriced that it's rarely worth trying. We do however have a few local bakeries that do fresh gf (some are even paleo) pastries: still overpriced, but totally worth it. In any case, thanks for thinking of me. :-)
Frosted strawberry. My tears are the butter.
@jaremelz frosting for the win. bonus if it has sprinkles in it.
@thismyusername That's the only way! These kids these days with their crazy s'mores and peanut butter flavors.
Any of the fruit flavored, unfrosted pop tarts, with a nice pat of Kerrygold salted Irish butter. Frosted are great, but the butter makes the unfrosted ones awesome.
"Callow youth" . . . Holy fucking vocabulary there, for a puppet.
This may be my favorite Ask Irk yet.
@Pavlov I'm still laughing at that. Also at "try it with butter"
@AnnaB We may need to meet someday for a drink.
@Pavlov I'm always up for a drink
@Pavlov @AnnaB I have a Doubletree rewards card with an indeterminate amount of points y'all are welcome to use.
@AnnaB I believe we're being told politely to "get a room".
@irishbyblood @Pavlov Just a little word appreciation, folks 😃
By all means, butter your pop tarts. It's the healthiest thing you can do for them. #lovehealthyfats
Two winning Irk videos in a row. Kudos.
First of all, we all have Family Guy to thank for this becoming part of pop (tart, get it?) culture:
Peter & Quagmire - Butter on a Pop-Tart
And after the episode "Into Harmony's Way" aired, I took a brown sugar cinnamon Pop-Tart, toasted it, and smeared a pad of butter on the crust side, not the frost side. I can tell you I was pleasantly surprised. It was so freaking good! The crust begins to resemble an actual pastry. It's incredible. So you absolutely have to toast it, eating butter on a cold Pop-Tart is not the way to go.
@vvedge This is exactly the way I grew up eating them -- Brown sugar cinnamon flavor, toasted, then flipped to the back (which is concave) and buttered, so that the butter melts and pools and soaks in.
@vvedge Is a pad of butter anything like a pat of butter?
@Trin This is how we raised our daughter. Wait, Christine, is that you? ;-)
Strawberry Frosted Pop Tarts have to be the greatest junk breakfast food ever made. Well unless you count actual Rice Krispie Treats as a breakfast food....then the Pop Tarts are a distant second! Why would anyone mess with perfection and add something unnecessary to it?!
Eat butter tarts instead!
@atannir ahh yes, the frozen toaster strudel... mmmmmm......
@thismyusername http://www.food.com/recipe/award-winning-butter-tarts-14756
They're Canadian and delicious!
@atannir Eat buttered tarts! They'll thank you for it.
@atannir @joelmw Butter Tarts! Holy crap my grandmother was legendary for her butter tarts. Now I want some.
@Bingo I confess, I was just thinking about this joke: http://www.benlocker.co.uk/the-only-known-joke-about-collective-nouns/
@atannir never had, will make some thanks!
@atannir It's got raisins in it...
@joelmw There is at least one other joke on collective nouns, and I think it's better: what do you call a group of school administrators? A Lack of Principals.
@SIMBM Nice. And ouch.
@ThatsHeadly I love that movie (although it was apparent on later viewings that it was also designed to provide an extended time in an air conditioned theater).
Diary of Shame, day 1. The husband and I just split a package of frosted strawberry with butter on the other side. The feeling is.... not altogether unpleasant.
@jaremelz as long as you both consented
@TerriblyHuang In writing, in triplicate.
The name pronunciations are the cutest part of these videos.
@ThatsHeadly - Blazing Saddles? (I thought someone was stealing your name, guess your strategy worked!)
@KDemo yep. Weird. I deleted that post because it has the wrong video by you were able to reply to it. I was surprised that it let me change it so I did.
@ThatsHeadly - Didn't see your video, just knew Headly Lamarr from the movie.
I love strawberry and blueberry Pop Tarts, and so does my hubby. I think butter would be a bit much on the frosted ones, but I imagine it would be pretty good on the unfrosted kind.
$0.25 for a Pop Tart? Where are you buying yours??
Irk Googled it, it looked like two-buck eight-packs were the norm
@jbsegal Just about anywhere? Keep in mind that a single pop tart counts as a serving, which means putting one pop tart back into the foil and back in the cupboard, where she will surely be scared of the dark and emit a foul stench and screams-a-plenty which scares all the pop tarts and makes them rot faster . It is a known fact that it is just better to eat both from the pouch to keep from stressing your pop tart city. http://www.amazon.com/Pop-Tarts-Frosted-Strawberry-16-Count/dp/B00I8QXP4Q/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1427955889&sr=1-1&keywords=pop+tarts http://www.walmart.com/ip/Kellogg-s-Pop-Tart-Ice-Cream-Shoppe-Frosted-Hot-Fudge-Sundae-Toaster-Pastries-16ct/14664716
@lowerone Seriously, what kind of person just eats one Pop Tart?
@jbsegal I just bought 10 boxes of pumpkin pie Pop-Tarts at Target for $2.08 a box. That should hold me until fall. And those were 12 packs (usually $2.99).
When I was a boy, all Pop-Tarts were unfrosted. Toasting and buttering was they way they were meant to be eaten. The addition of frosting ruined Pop-Tarts for me. Last I checked, the only ones you can still get unfrosted are strawberry and blueberry. Fortunately, those two were always my favorites.
@ChunkyBitz did you have to walk 5 miles uphill in the show to get them?
@ThatsHeadly It was 10 miles, and it was uphill both ways.
There's not enough butter in the world to improve the flavor of the new Peanut Butter & Jelly Pop Tarts. The Human Eating Machines which are my twins noped out of them and that says a lot. They even tried freezing a pack--yeah, frozen frosted Pop Tarts are a thing in my house. Bleah.
I'm now reminded of Last Tango in Paris. To Irk and his lover @pepsiwine, get your camera and remake that iconic scene from the film and share with us all.
Get the buttah!
"If you find something you love, and it is either inanimate or consenting, by all means try it with butter." Best line EVER from an Ask Irk to date. Way to go!
@jimmyd103 If not the best, it's pretty damn close.
S'mores poptarts. . . with milk.
This was a truly A-grade Ask Irk
I'm trying to picture the 25% of the time butter doesn't improve what you're eating. You slathered butter on your...butter, maybe? And the effect was negligible?
@Trask "eating" not specified. Thinking iced tea, origami, the trapeze
@matthew Had to google it...turns out you're right about the tea: http://www.yowangdu.com/tibetan-food/butter-tea.html
@matthew @Trask On a somewhat related note: FWIW, my wife has started putting butter (the Kerrygold @duodec mentioned) in our coffee. Pretty good stuff.
@joelmw some butter and a tiny pinch of salt in the coffee... Or whipping cream.
Word.
No offense, young people; it's part of what makes you bold and vigorous and adorable.
@joelmw The only issue is when they revel in their ignorance and wear it like a badge of honor.
@ThatsHeadly That and when they deny it and are sure that they know everything and us old farts nothing--or nothing of consequence.
Pop tarts? Like Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera ? Not a fan. I have no knowledge about added butter, and I very much prefer to remain in ignorance, thankyouverymuch.
@rockblossom Thanks for sharing your disinterest!
I once made homemade pop tarts. Using twee preserves. They were awful and terrible, but worse, they were pointless. No butter, not even butter churned of milk from the silky mammaries of free-range virgins, could have saved them, not even if the butter had been salted using the tears of a weeping Madonna statue.
But this thread is the first I've ever heard of buttering pop tarts. I'm not sure I'd try it, unless they come out with lobster pop tarts and the butter is melted.
@editorkid wouldn't lobster pop tarts be hot pockets?
Pop-tarts are like bungee jumping... always seem like a brilliant idea while I'm standing in queue. But once I'm in the middle of it... I wonder "WTF was I thinking?".
Still, somehow I always seem to forget... Pop-tarts are somewhat akin to roofing shingles. So as I'm wandering down the aisle at the local grocer's and I see those Brown Sugar Cinnamon 'tarts and hear them calling to me... I'm powerless to resist their charm.
I guess it's like looking at that gorgeous bird across the table from you through the bottom of a pint, only to wake up next to Dame Edna.
Seriously, Irk, everyone knows Kellogg's makes pop tarts.
@darksaber99999 They're Gr-r-reat!
I love butter so damn much. I love to cook, I think 'fat' is the 6th flavor and it's one that I utilize as damn often as I can.
You know what makes most restaurants "fine dining"?
Butter & cream, my friends…butter & cream.
I never tried butter on Pop Tarts, but there's no way that butter wouldn't make them better. Like many of you I was also a huge fan of Irk's endorsement to "try it with butter".
Oh, and as a kid I totally snuck a few scoops of butter with a spoon every now and then.
@JonT You're a butter snacker!?!? My husband does this and it weirds me out.
@JonT @Thumperchick My wife says that if you're eating the right butter it's actually a very healthful thing to do. And I totally believe her, especially when it comes to this. But, owing to my maladies, she knows about this kind of shit (because the alternative is my knowing and pfft on that).
@JonT @Thumperchick She has in fact offered me a spoonful and said, "Here, you need to eat this." Yeah, my wife is awesome.
@Thumperchick previous butter snacker! I no longer do this (though I really want to all the time).
@joelmw Butter is definitely good for you - especially grass fed, etc. It's not the idea of what it is, but how it tastes on it's own. It's too rich for my brain to allow me to just... eat it, lol.
@JonT
That "Mmm; butter." was awesome.
I did eat a good number of Pop Tarts, but soon switched over to Toaster Strudels, which would generally still taste good even if I burnt them a bit or left out the frosting.
Some good things to try here with Pop Tarts though, so I'll probably get some again.
100 COMMETSN
@matthew![](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIABAP///wAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==)
@JonT![](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIABAP///wAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==)
Okay so this Family Guy episode where there buttering their poptarts has blown up, but I remember back in the day there was a movie where a child I believe had been buttering their poptarts it’s driving me crazy because of that movie is why I started buttering my poptarts but I can’t remember what movie it was in. I feel like it was Pauly Shore in Encino Man or Punky Brewster, or something I remember the kid having tons of friendship bracelets on and it popping up and the butter going on the poptart. Can anybody who’s older help me out with this I need to know!!!