Sylvania Motion Sensing Outlet
- Because the Clapper takes too much effort
- Set it to motion sensor mode, plug a lamp in, eventually forget how you ever turned that lamp on and off before
- Use your imagination: release a cloud of hornets at intruders, or freak out your roommates with animatronic creepy little girl twins
- Might be fun for Halloween but not made for outdoor use
- White plastic “complements any decor”, Sylvania says
Energy-saving motion-sensor power switch... or diabolical defense system?
Hi. I’m the resident of the house you just broke into. If you’re watching this, you’re probably wondering why you can’t move right now.
Allow me to explain. You see, I connected a Sylvania Table-Top Timer to a valve that, when activated by motion in this room, releases an invisible, odorless gas. This powerful nerve agent completely immobilizes anyone who inhales it, while leaving that poor unfortunate fully awake. And conscious.
I also connected my TV and DVD player to another Sylvania Table-Top Timer. As with the other timer, this one also activates when it detects motion. But this time, the effect is to play this video greeting, to let you know you’ll shortly be on your way to jail.
But that’s not all I have in mind for you. It occurred to me that you would appreciate some entertainment while you’re waiting for the police. So as soon as this one-minute message ends, you will enjoy 29 minutes of Progressive Insurance commercials.
That’s right. 58 visits from the lovable spokespixie Flo. 58 little torments. 58 varieties of pain.
Let Flo tell you, in her inimitably bubbly fashion, about all the ways she can save you money on your insurance. I trust that by the time you get to the one where she acts like a robot, you will be pleading for the mercy of prison.
