Swann Security Systems (1080p or Standard)
- Won’t keep all bad guys away
- Won’t tell you who the bad guys are
- Won’t help you catch the bad guys
- Won’t put the bad guys in jail
- The included bad-guys-beware stickers are probably the most effective thing here, and you could print those yourself
In lifelike Placeb-O-Vision
Hey, somebody stole your lawnmower! Good thing you set up these security cameras, right? And there’s the guy, right there on video, the nose on his face as plain as the nose on your face. Now the cops will leap into action to nab the guy! Rush the footage to the lab! Enhance! ENHANCE!
Ha. That’s not how it works. Unless the evildoer is Rob Ford or an iPhone 6 or some equally recognizable video star, that damning video probably won’t help you catch them. And an iPhone 6 isn’t going to steal your lawnmower. (Rob Ford, who knows?) Turns out the police have more important things to do. What are they supposed to do, anyway? Drop everything to scan some imaginary database of mean guys’ faces?
Now, if the primary suspects you’re trying to nab are your cats, the cheaper indoor system might make sense. The standard of evidence to successfully prosecute a broken vase or spilled bottle in feline court is pretty low, and the judges (you) operate without any judicial oversight. At least those videos will be much more entertaining to watch.
But hey, as stupid as security cameras are, maybe criminals are stupider. Maybe hooking these up in prominent spots around the perimeter will spook the local dumbass malefactors into stealing somebody else’s lawnmower.
If that entirely theoretical deterrent is enough for you, each system includes a hard drive, four cameras, live smartphone viewing, and probably most effectively, four “theft deterrent stickers”. Lose some money to an illusion of security, or lose your lawnmower to the bad guys? Maybe it’ll be both!
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Swann Security Systems (1080p or Standard) 67
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Totally Not Rigged Games of Chance 9
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How do you keep yourself from becoming a burglary victim? 32
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Streak Broken 3 -
what really happened to all that stuff we sent you? 37 -
Day 0/Day 1 Contest Winners rewards. 14 -
Why are the gray lines gone? 9 -
meh Sadness and Confusion 3