Sunbeam Touch Up and Go Iron Kit
Our Take
- Dual ceramic soleplates iron both sides at once: wait, why aren’t all irons like this?- Three temperature levels for the varied composition of your vestments- Shuts off after 15 minutes so you don’t burn your house down, you scatterbrain- Model: GCSBTG
I AM IRON MAN
What is going on?Ironing the clothes he’s got on <sup>1</sup>Master of sleeve and cuffFor Iron Mitt, perfection is never enough![iron][1]Born to rule the landWith iron burns on his wrists and handsKnows how it feels to killBut only “small varmints, if you will” <sup>2</sup>![blinking][2]Forged in scorching heatDoes he iron the socks on his feet?Howling in the nightIn Michigan “trees are just the right height” <sup>3</sup>![Jenga][3]Nobody told himDon’t iron your sleeve, you’ll get burnedSomeone should have told himHow much middle-class people earn <sup>4</sup>![Big Bird][4]He’ll endure any hurtIn pursuit of a well-pressed shirtTo you and me it seems insaneBut Iron Mitt feels no pain![neck twist][5]Nobody knows ifHe’s programmed or autonomousLook at today’s contendersTurns out the joke’s on us![laugh][6]The current candidatesMake Iron Mitt look pretty greatMaybe he should run againCome back, Iron Mitt, all is forgiven![iron encore][7] [1]: 
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