8-Pack: Kenn & Kitt Vet-Formulated Dog Treats
- Your choice of two 4-packs with 60 soft chews per bag. That’s 480 chews!
- These things are “on sale” for like, $17-$19 per bag over at Kenn & Kitt
- They’re apparently good for heart, joint & tummy health, as well as skin & coat
- Wheat-free, no preservatives, and made in the USA
- Your dogs won’t care that these are healthy because, well… they’re dogs and will eat anything
- Best by May/June 2024, except for Digestion… those puppies are best by May 2023
- Favorite horror movie: Kit Follows
Treat Yo'Dog
Hey. It’s me. Your dog. I wanted to talk to you about a little double standard I’ve noticed.
You see, I might act stupid–I might bark at my shadow or growl at my reflection in the mirror or chase my tail or what have you–but I’m actually very observant. I notice, for example, that you keep receiving these boxes from a place called ‘Meh,’ and I notice that, more and more, these boxes contain snacks.
Your justification for this? They were cheap. You got them in bulk. They’re actually pretty healthy.
To which I say: sure, buddy.
As in: sure those chocolate-covered almonds are healthy. If you don’t, ya know, eat ten handfuls in a sitting. And those Kind bars, with the ingredients you can pronounce? Well, guess what: it’s hard to pronounce anything when you’re busy chewing your third one in an hour.
And to be honest, I wouldn’t usually mind this. I can relate. I’m a dog, after all. I’m not generally known for my ability to pace myself: not at the dog park, and not in front of my bowl. So I get it. You get a craving, and you grab a snack.
But how come it’s only you who gets to enjoy this snacking lifestyle? We’ve been to the pet store to pick up food. I know there are things on clearance. I know there are things sold in bulk. And I know healthy dog treats. So where’s my stash, huh?
That’s not a rhetorical question, by the way. There is a correct answer. And that answer is this: right here.
See, I logged into your computer–it took me a while to guess the password, which is embarrassing, considering it’s just my name–and I emailed your friends at ‘Meh’ asking if they could sell a little something for all their customers’ furry friends. And they obliged with these Kenn & Kit dog treats. You can choose two four-packs and get me something tasty for between meals, something that will apparently prevent heart disease, help with my gut health, keep my joints in good working order, and make my coat shine.
And, in turn, I’ll love you more than I already do.
It’s a good trade, right? But if I haven’t convinced you, then let’s try this: these treats will be payment for all the social media likes I’ve helped you accrue over the years.
However you justify it, I don’t care. Just get me some treats, okay?