Inflatable Bluetooth Speaker
- People have been saying, “Every great pool party starts with a unicorn or a watermelon,” and now we finally understand why.
- Blow them up and then blow up your hot tub with some hot beats.
- Easy to inflate, good wireless range, fast pairing, blah blah blah… IT’S A UNICORN OR A WATERMELON BLUETOOTH POOL SPEAKER!
- Model: honestly, it feels like it would ruin the magic to put a model number to these.
Vision Quest
-Kyle, I need to tell you about a vision I had. But please: don’t laugh. I swear, I saw all of this.
-I promise I won’t laugh, Todd.
-Okay. I was in a small crystalline lake. The water was clear. The floor smooth. I was enjoying myself when what did I se coming towards me but a small unicorn.
-Um, Todd…
-I told you it would sound nuts, but I swear, it’s what I saw. A little unicorn. Swimming towards me. And singing songs from the newly released Get Up Kids album.
-Todd, about this ‘vision’…
-I’m not finished. I swam away from the unicorn. I don’t know why. I know you tell me I need to be brave, but I just couldn’t face it. I wasn’t ready. In my retreat I bumped into something. A halved watermelon.
-Yeah, Todd, that’s my…
-Shhh! Stop interrupting me, Kyle! The watermelon, it spoke.
-Let me guess, it said some strange stuff in a southern accent.
-Yes!
-And then, its voice changed.
-Yes!
-And said, ‘This is Shit-town.’
-That’s exactly it! You’ve seen it too! What does it mean, Kyle?!
-It means you were in my pool. Those are my inflatable bluetooth speakers. I bought them from Meh. Separately. It wasn’t a two-pack. But they’re pretty great. They’re fully water proof, they inflate really easily, and have nice range.
-So… it wasn’t a vision?
-No, Todd. It wasn’t.
-But I ate so many mushrooms.
-That’s not how chanterelles work, Todd.