The TV of today... tomorrow!

If 2014 was The Year When Superfancy 4K-3D-HDR-Smart-TV Wasn’t Quite Ready Yet, 2015 will be The Year When Superfancy 4K-3D-HDR-Smart-TV Still Wasn’t Quite Ready Yet.

So here’s a cheapish, decent, regular old HDTV to get you through to (hopefully) 2016. Nothing wrong with a 38.6" 1080p LED screen with a 60Hz refresh rate. Can’t argue with those 3 HDMI ports either. It’ll be a perfectly acceptable window on the world for 2015. But what kind of year will you watch unfold? Gaze into our liquid crystal ball…

JANUARY: At the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas, a scheduling mixup at the Panasonic booth accidentally confirms the conspiracy theory that the persona known to the public as “Danny DeVito” is actually a fictional construct portrayed by several different actors.

FEBRUARY: Steve Carell captures the Academy Award for Most Disturbing Prosthetic Nose.

MARCH: The New York City St. Patrick’s Day Parade splinters into competing celebrations over the issue of marriage between gay leprechauns.

APRIL: Wal-Mart celebrates its 1,000,000th employee to receive food stamps.

MAY: Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong-Un jointly announce that, thanks to scientific advancements in their respective countries, they are expecting their first child.

JUNE: A Florida man is severely injured when he gets an alligator high on bath salts in the lavatory of a Ruby Tuesday.

JULY: A Mediocre Corporation announces its acquisition of Amazon. Not the well-known online retailer, they clarify; rather, the rust-damaged chassis of a two-door 1967 Volvo Amazon.

AUGUST: Everybody just kinda chills the fuck out because man, shit’s just been too much lately, right?

SEPTEMBER: In a bold step for politics into the social-media age, Anthony Weiner launches the first presidential campaign to be conducted entirely via Snapchat.

OCTOBER: After just a few weeks on the job, Stephen Colbert is fired by CBS as host of Late Night and replaced by Jay Leno.

NOVEMBER: Peter Jackson releases The Hobbit: By Divine Rights Reserved, a three-hour film adaptation of the book’s copyright page.

DECEMBER: The San Diego Padres win the NFC South despite being a baseball team.