You're welcome, sir, you may have another.

We’ve been seeing a lot of new faces visiting the site lately, thanks to the malware that enables us to see through your webcam as soon as you create a Meh account. Well, today is the day we beat you all into the gang. With a vacuum cleaner.

Ask our longtimers: you’re not really part of this crew until you’ve learned to complain about the frequency of vacuum cleaners. Vacuum cleaners around here are like rain in Seattle, feral monkeys in Delhi, or awkward self-important dot-com manchildren in a San Francisco bar. Complaining about them is a sort of ritual, but everybody knows there’s nothing anyone can do to make them go away.

Of course, people keep buying them. There are always going to be plenty of takers for a Dyson DC41 at this price. No other vacuum is so trusted to eradicate pet hair from your floors, along with whatever other debris is lurking down there. That maneuverable ball. That Root Cyclone suction. That futuristic canister that makes emptying filth feel like a sci-fi space adventure. Until Dyson came along, “charismatic vacuum cleaner” was a contradiction in terms.

And take note, jaded ones: the Dyson DC41 is superior to the smaller Dyson DC50 you often see making the online discount scene: bigger capacity, more effective cleaner head, longer reach, almost twice as many airwatts of suction (shut up, “airwatts” are too a real thing).

But it and its floor-cleaning brethren also serve the vital function of uniting the Meh community in a collective shrug. Now that you’ve passed through this cleansing fire, your fellow cos-Meh-politans can let you in on the other arcana known only to true initiates. Talk amongst yourselves in the forums.