Lazy Bundle: Easy-Viewing Neck Mount and Emoji Neck Pillow and Eyemask
- Lazy bundle includes phone mount and silly pillow
- The Bluestone phone mount allows you to watch stuff without dropping your phone on your face (admit it; it’s happened)
- Emoji neck pillow is for travel… or for falling asleep at the dining room table while watchingGuy’s Grocery Games
- Model: L4ZY-53XY-C00L
It’s not a gag gift if you keep it for yourself.
You know what, 2020? We’ve had it with your nonsense.
If you’re going to keep behaving as if the matrix we all live in is being run by some cynical matrix intern while the real Agent Smith or whoever goes on vacation, then we’re going to quit taking you seriously.
Here’s what’s going to happen.
Step one: no more pants for video conferences. That pretense ends now.
Step two: we’re going to start binge-watching TV with a screen literally strapped to our faces surrounded by adorable emoji pillows.
Okay this seemed more subversive before writing it out.
Listen, everybody. Today’s bundle is some serious ridiculousness. (Can ridiculousness be serious?)
Assuming you are any semblance of a functioning adult, your initial reaction should be one of dismissal and disgust. But just give it a minute.
Let the concept of a screen tied to your face like a horse’s feedbag roll around in your brain for a little bit like a mouthful of odd liquor where you can’t quite decide if it’s tasty or gasoline.
On the one hand, it might bring you about as close as possible to being an actual inanimate object. On the other hand, you’re a filthy liar if you say you’ve never been laying down with your phone and dropped it on your face.
You could mindlessly watch your videos without having to hold your phone up. You could even do something with your hands, like sew a travel pillow from emoji fabric.
But you won’t have to. Because we’ll toss in that emoji travel pillow. They are very squishy and are actually quite pleasant to have around, whether you’re watching your face-mounted TV or not.
The lazy bundle is not a gag gift. It’s a decadent little escape from a preposterous reality that we could all use right now.
And if you aren’t quite ready for this kind of lifestyle choice yourself, kids love crap like this. At least grab a bundle for them.
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Lazy Bundle: Easy-Viewing Neck Mount and Emoji Neck Pillow and Eyemask 46
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