A Meh-rathon of Sweet Meh-mories

This is a 2-pack of Mophie Powerstation Plus Mini 12W Chargers with Integrated USB-C Cables. You either know what that is, or can jump in the forum to ask other people about it.

Why aren’t we giving you more info? Well, we weren’t sure what to write for the Meh-rathon so we decided to look at some past Meh write-ups for inspiration. (You can find a random one here, if you want.) Unfortunately, all that did was make us nostalgic and maybe a little teary-eyed. And then the boss was all “Where’s the write-ups, writer dude?” and we panicked and… uhh… Please enjoy this classic write-up about an entirely different product! Also, feel free to share in the forum if you find one you liked or forgot about or missed entirely.

The first thing you need to know here is that you get 550 audio books on a 32gb flash drive (or 125 audio books on an 8gb flash drive for the children’s version). They’re mostly classics: Alice In Wonderland, Huck Finn, lots of Jack London, etc.

The second thing you need to know is that these are narrated by professionals. These are not publicly-sourced. The quality will be a lot higher than the ones you can download for free.

The third thing you need to know is that the versions being read here are final drafts. This is important because, with old books like these–whose copyrights have expired, resulting in a mad scramble of budget publishers each trying to put out their own edition–it isn’t uncommon for older drafts to enter the marketplace. And while they can make for an interesting study, showing how many iconic authors were not just master prose stylists but also adept editors, it is often clear why certain changes were made.

To illustrate this, we’ve located the early drafts of several books included with the e-Go Library, and compared them to the final published versions. Below are some passages that were ultimately cut.

Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

“19,968 leagues under the sea,” said Captain Nemo. “19,969 leagues under the sea. 19,970 leagues under the sea…”

“Hey, I forget,” said one of the crew members, “how many tentacles does an octopus have?”

“Eight,” said another crew member.

“Great,” said Captain Nemo. “Just friggin’ great, you guys. Now I lost count. Okay, you know what that means. Bring us back to the top. Are we surfaced? Good. Let’s try this again. 1 league under the sea. 2 leagues under the sea. 3 leagues under the sea…”

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

“Please,” I told the terrified family in the cabin. “Frankenstein is my father’s name. You can call me Frankenstein’s monster.”

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alaexandre Dumas

Revenge was chief among his concerns, of course. But he had a more immediate issue: he was locked in a kitchen.

Soon enough they’ll find me and let me out, he thought.

Until then, he had no choice but to occupy his time with whatever he could find. All there appeared to be were two eggs, several slices of ham, a loaf of bread, and a pan of hot oil.

What could I possibly make with this confounding assortment of ingredients? wondered the Count of Monte Cristo.

Gulliver’s Travels by Jonathan Swift

After traveling to Lilliput and Brobdingnag, I ended up, by means of another wrong turn, on the island of Ffilidiline, where I was definitely not larger than the inhabitants. Nor was I much smaller, although I was slightly so, which meant I often had to ask for others to open doors for me, as I was not tall enough to reach the doorknobs myself.

“I’m sorry that you’re always having to open doors for me,” I said, one night, to my host.

“No, it’s fine,” he said, but I could tell it wasn’t actually fine.

“I won’t be here for long,” I said. “Once my ship is repaired, you won’t have to open doors for me.”

“The door thing is really not a big deal,” said my host.

“I understand, but over time, after opening so many doors, I’m sure the burden–”

“Can we have one dinner where we don’t talk about the doors?” he snapped. Which, to my mind confirmed the truth: he was not a big fan of opening the doors for me.

See, you’re not missing much. The versions on the e-Go library are much better!