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"The Big One" Down Alternative Comforter
- A big fluffy comforter for those who aren’t down with down
- Mighty plump but still lightweight and manageable
- Reversible… so it’s basically two comforters?
- (To be clear: it is one comforter)
- Model: N0T0R1U5-816-0N3
The Big One: A Short Play
Two astronomers fuss around with equipment in an observatory. A sharp ding sounds and they both stop working. One of the astronomers removes his phone from his lab coat and reads what’s on the screen.
ASTRONOMER 1: Huh.
ASTRONOMER 2: What is it?
ASTRONOMER 1: The Big One. It’s arrived.
ASTRONOMER 2: Oh wow. You mean it’s finally upon us?
ASTRONOMER 1: Not yet. It will be tonight, though, when we go to sleep.
ASTRONOMER 2: Perhaps we could shoot it down.
ASTRONOMER 1: No. There is no down.
ASTRONOMER 2: You’re right. Too dangerous.
ASTRONOMER 1: It’ll be so nice.
ASTRONOMER 2: So, the impact will be painless then?
ASTRONOMER 1: The opposite of painless, actually.
ASTRONOMER 2: Really?
ASTRONOMER 1: Yes. Very soft.
ASTRONOMER 2: Interesting.
ASTRONOMER 1: And hypoallergenic.
ASTRONOMER 2: Wait, what are you talking about?
ASTRONOMER 1: The Big One. You know? The down alternative comforter I ordered? That I just got a delivery notification for on my phone?
ASTRONOMER 2: Oh! Crazy! I thought you meant the Big One, as in the enormous meteor heading towards earth we’ve been tasked to monitor from this remote observatory!
ASTRONOMER 1: Ha! That’s so funny! What a silly mix-up! But no, I was talking about my comforter. The meteor shouldn’t be here until next week at the soonest.