So Fresh, So Clean

DATE: 4/16/26
TIME: 2:03 pm
TO: Forum Moderation Team
SUBJ: Day off tomorrow

Forum moderators of Meh, we wanted to kindly let you know that your services will not be required on Friday, April 17th, and so you should feel free to do whatever you please during work hours!

The reason for this act of generosity? It’s quite simple, really. We are selling a perfect product, and so, moderation will be superfluous. After all, what’s there to moderate in a veritable parade of praise and adulation?

You see, what we’re offering is a shower head boasting easy installation and a powerful flow. More importantly, though, it’s filled with little rocks that filter the water passing through it, resulting in exceptionally fresh showers. If you’d like further information (for your own personal benefit, of course; again, you won’t need to know this, because your moderation duties will be suspended for the day), please consult the following image:

See? The veracity of the science is unquestionable, give or take a typo. And when has a typo ever become a discussion point for such a forgiving customer base as ours!

Here, if you are curious, is a real image of the product in use.

Amazing, isn’t it? The water is so fresh, the woman is literally fading away, as she has fulfilled her lifelong goal of experiencing a truly clean shower and can now leave this mortal plane.

But again, you are not required to understand any of this, because you will not be working! Enjoy the break!

Best,
Meh Management

DATE: 4/17/26
TIME: 1:04 am
TO: Forum Moderation Team
SUBJ: Day off cancelled

Dear god. Please come to work immediately. We need your help.