Slow and Low (Effort)

Here’s my semi-regular confession that I watch way too many cooking competition shows.

One in particular: 24 in 24: Last Chef Standing.

If you’re unfamiliar, the show assembles a cast of chefs who compete in 24 challenges over the course of 24 hours. Basically, someone at Food Network thought it would be a great idea to take an activity that prominently involves knives and fire and stress, and then deprive the contestants of sleep. Miraculously, no fingers were lost in the process (at least, not that they showed on TV).

But I don’t want to discuss the series as a whole.

The part that matters in relation to today’s sale happens in the beginning of the first episode. The contestants must race to prep a series of veggies so that they can choose a station with a set protein. Is this kind of convoluted? Yes. But the point is: we get to watch a bunch of professional chefs chop vegetables.

As they observe, hosts Michael Symon and Ester Choi discuss how many of the participants have ascended to such a place in their careers where they no longer need to do such menial tasks. The reason for this discussion is simple. Despite it being a race, some of the chefs work at a pretty slow pace.

And honestly, I found it heartening. So often you see people on TV dice an entire onion in two seconds with what looks like four rapid cuts. Seeing that even people who have devoted themselves to food can struggle to make a little mirepoix makes me feel better about my own sub-optimal efficiency in the kitchen.

What’s more: I kind of enjoy this aspect of cooking. Having pro-level knife skills would be rad, but there’s also something relaxing about just giving yourself over to the process. It can be meditative, almost, working your way through all that garlic and celery and carrots and shallots and whatever else you need for a random Sunday supper.

But then there are those days, which are plentiful this time of year, when you’re hosting. You’re not making a simple dinner for four. You’re making a banquet for fourteen, and if you want to leisurely mince each ingredient of the five dishes you have on the menu, you’d better plan on getting up at five in the morning.

A better strategy: do that same leisurely prep over the course of an entire week. The only problem with this is that you need some good airtight storage containers to hold all the stuff you prep.

Wait a minute! That’s what we’re selling today, isn’t it? What a coincidence!

Then, when the banquet’s over, you can use these for leftovers, which you can keep for yourself or give away. We recommend the second option. Because this is the season of generosity. Also, if you give away your Lock n Locks you’ll have to buy some more for us in the future. Everyone wins! (Except maybe you, actually.)