Sponsored Post (That’s Coming From Inside the House)

As part of a limited pilot program aimed at introducing new revenue streams for meh.com, you will begin seeing this space occasionally made available to third parties for an undisclosed fee. Today’s content is brought to you by the highest bidder, who also happens to have been the lowest bidder, who ALSO happens to be your cat. Or your dog. We’re not sure. The DMs got a little chaotic along the way. Anyway, meh is not responsible for the content of this advertisement.

Hi there! It’s me. Your pet.

I realize that it seems like negotiating an unprecedented ad buy with your favorite daily deal retail website feels like overkill, especially when I’m literally staring at you right now, but something had to give.

The treats you’ve been providing are not working out. Sure, I eat them. Sometimes I might even appear to be relatively happy about doing so. But as you recall, I also dug through the kitchen trash to slurp up the goo in the bottom of the rotisserie chicken bag and that is not a sign of a pet who has all of their nutritional needs otherwise met.

We get cravings, you see. Maybe we’re eating that plant you insist kills cats because we’re looking for homeopathic allergy relief. Perhaps we get into those special brownies that you only admit exist after the kids are in bed because we, too, are trying to take the edge off after a stressful day. (Did you not see that the mailman CONTINUES to approach the house and that those kids STILL get off the bus across the street, no matter how many times we destroy the living room blinds about it?!)

Anyway, the point here is that all behavior is communication. If that behavior is trying to steal your steak out of a hot pan while your back is turned, maybe we’re communicating that we need a good multivitamin to help us continue operating at our peak physical prowess. If the behavior is retching relentlessly at 3 a.m. at the most carpety part of the carpet in the house, we’re communicating that you need to grab a refill on that hairball control stuff you bought here a while back.

You follow?

You probably do. Despite occasional appearances to the contrary I like you very much and am just pointing out but one simple shortcoming in your otherwise perfectly passable pet parenting prowess.

Anyway, this guy named @Troy who seemed more than willing to do anything in his power to move some of these pet supplement treats says that they’ll be really inexpensive and available in a variety of bundles for dogs and/or cats for the rest of the day.

I’m sorry it had to come to this.

With Love,
Your pet.

P.S. I hid the remote.

Again, Meh is not responsible for the content of this advertisement and Troy, this janky check you brought us better clear.