Worst Christmas Gifts
3Betting most everyone has a story, & that they will probably all be worth a laugh, so I’ll start - worst gifts received this year (so far). I mean ones that you wouldn’t even consider re-gifting to anyone else yourselves. We received a pair of pink furry slippers 2 sizes too small for even me, an umbrella with a flashlight in the handle, & some gadget that peels potatoes/apples/pears/etc. Now, seriously; exactly how lazy do you have to be where you need something to take 5 minutes & peel a potatoe for you … really? So - what genuinely laughable gifts did you guys get landed with?
- 15 comments, 77 replies
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@scfd0766 On the whole, you sound very ungrateful. You didn’t give us any context in which to judge your gifts.
The slippers might be wonderful for a niece or grandchild. The umbrella sounds great for a rainy night trying to find the keyhole on a dark, wet porch. The potato peeler? Some people like to make fresh apple pie and that sounds perfect.
Were these work gifts? Dirty Santa gifts? White elephant gift exchange or what?
@therealjrn
I can tell you what someone I know got - makeup samples, the free ones, and she doesn’t wear makeup, and if she did, they were totally the wrong colors anyway.
Overall, it’s the thought that counts. Some put no thought into it. It’s force of habit, same thing every year, and no one wants it. Those are the only bad gifts I know of.
@Cerridwyn They are trying to tell her something…
@Cerridwyn my 11yr old bought me lipstick even tho I don’t wear make up lol (it was cute tho)
@therealjrn
no, not really, it was … not worth explaining, let’s just say that 20 years ago, it would have cost this person their job.
@ragingredd yeah, i remember a cheesy gold necklace I treasure 30 years later
@Cerridwyn So you’re not going to spell it out.
I’m going to say stolen from work samples. eww. That makes it much worse. “Here’s some crap I stole, Merry Christmas”
Meh face pillows.
@Barney They should of had a purple option.
@therealjrn Absolutely.
@therealjrn and red id take a red and black one
@therealjrn I’m really surprised they haven’t added a purple option to every MEH product they have.
@Barney Meh socks and underwear next year?
@Targaryen
Just what @Barney would want for her birthday next year; purple Meh socks and underwear.
@Targaryen What a wonderful idea! I hope you push for that this year. We can get @mflassy to model them.
@Barney @Targaryen
Depends on the style.
Also, I’m not sure @FlipIt would feel like this is part of the job.
Worst gift our entire family got this year is a fucktard in the neighborhood burglarized my husband’s semi for the 3rd time. Nothing worth stealing so he took all of the bottled pop that hubs buys when he’s home so he doesn’t have to pay truckstop prices.
2nd time that window has been shattered while on hometime so company says no more truck at home.
Anybody want to come to a New Years packing party? I’ll provide the hard cider, you provide the muscles? I hate Montgomery. Rant over.
Merry Xmas and Happy Solstice to everyone.
@sarahsandroid Montgomery does have problems with crime. I live about an hour away from, went there yesterday. We have a lot of gang trouble in this small town, Selma. I live in the country away from that mess. Schools in downtown, near where I worked did a lot of lock downs.
So sorry the thieves robbed and ruined, what you worked hard for. I hate that happened to you.
I wish I hadn’t come to read this thread, it just made me sad. Do I love everything I received no, do I love everyone that gave me a present, yes and having these people to love is the best gift of all. FYI, maybe it’s your issue not bad gift giving cause I think an umbrella with a flashlight is awesome and as late as I work, if that peeler can save me a few minutes while getting dinner ready, I’ll take it.
@mehbee
Wow … somehow I entirely misrepresented what I was trying to accomplish here - the key word was supposed to have been “laugh”. So, before I slink off into the sunset for having failed miserably in trying to give someone/anyone a good chuckle, please let me explain myself. No, these were not white elephant gifts, or gag gifts, or Dirty Santa gifts - and yes, I am grateful for my family & for the thought. We have this one dear family member whom is totally addicted to shopping on QVC - doesn’t seem to matter what it is, she HAS to buy one for everyone for Christmas. We ALL got the slippers & umbrellas & “Starfrit Potato Express” from her this round. Last year all the females in the family got the same huge awful handbag - it was bright red shiny plastic done in faux alligator skin print, and everybody got some bizarre gadget where you stuck hotdogs on points on each end, turned it on, & electrocuted them … at least that’s what they looked & smelled like. Every year she does this, to where its gotten to be expected by everyone - but we all say thank you & still love her. Personally, my most laugh inducing gift was the year my dear, sweet MIL thought she got such a great deal by purchasing everyone left-over Halloween pajamas (orange & black 2 piece with lights that lit up whenever you moved) in size 3XXX (her thought: everybody loves loose, comfortable p.j.s) off the clearance rack for $3.00 each @ Wally World. She was SO proud of herself - so we all had a good laugh, & a good joke was had by all, & that’s what we do in our family - we laugh about stuff & go on. This, however, did not turn out laughable - so I’m gonna go have a BIG glass of eggnog & go back to bed. Merry Christmas everyone - & my especial condolences & best wishes to Sarahsandriod in Montgomery.
@scfd0766 @scfd0766 I’m probably more sensitive than I should be, what came to mind immediately was someone without a lot of money doing the best they can rather a QVC habit…lol. I tend to be dramatic… sigh, I need to work on that. Merry Christmas!!
@scfd0766 I wish my Mom was still alive to give me tone-deaf gifts.
@therealjrn I wish my dad was still alive so I could give him Christmas gifts. I used to spend a lot of time trying to find something that would either make him laugh or cry…cry in the good way of course. I also miss giving him presents from his “grandkids “. They were whatever pets I happen to have at the time. Used to drive him crazy to open the card and see to Granddad signed with all the pet’s names. It’s fun to mess with the ones you love!
@scfd0766 You just hit a nerve in a few people- I took your post they way you meant it. The pajama thing is a scream. I hope you all put them on with a few safety pins and took a photo.
My kids would probably put the Robo Smasherz and kendamas they got this morning on your list too. And I once gave a set of bacon bowls to a neighbor.
Maybe a Meh problem is worse than a QVC habit?
@sammydog01 According to my bank account, MEH is much worse! I used my bacon bowls as a prize for one if the games we played at our family Christmas party.
@scfd0766 Hmm I gave everyone fidget spinners. Most seem to enjoy them. One 9th grader totally took his apart (budding engineer perhaps?) then couldn’t get it working again (luckily I had some extras in case one was not working). I’d guess a few would put them under worst present ever. I plead guilty as the giver - and it is all meh’s fault. Well and the goat’s (@therealjrn).
I was given a umbrella with a light in the handle. It was rare that I used the light, but I used the umbrella for probably ten years before it finally fell apart this year. What brand is yours?
I looked up that peeler. That would be great when making apple pie or a giant pile of mashed potatoes. Or if someone has arthritis if it’s the electric version. Interested in selling?
The worst gifts I’ve gotten are usually when someone buys me something that I specifically asked them to not buy for me because I don’t use it or have too many.
My ex’s family used to buy me clothing and sometimes purses to try and make me more feminine. Eventually I begged him to ask his family to not buy me those things anymore because I never wore the clothes and I didn’t carry a purse.
I honestly can’t think of anything to say is the worst gift. Some may have been less stellar than others but I reckon they’ve all been good or at the least, welcome. Nothing just comes to mind.
I will not get bad gifts. My only gifts will come from my sister, she has great taste!
My mother was always the one to give the best, I miss those days and my family. Sis is my only family besides my son. We have to stick together, even though she drives me crazy at times.
I did not want anything for Christmas, I have enough.
Hope y’all get what you wanted or get what you did not know you wanted!
And just be glad you have families who give you crap, love that crap, they took time to think about you and buy it for you.
You can always regift, but why would someone want what you did not?
@Calabama I have a work gift exchange table-top candle thing that would like to have a word with you. Nothing wrong with it, it’s just not my style. I still appreciated it. I might be melted though, I’m not sure where it is right now.
@therealjrn
Y’all should have done the like and dislikes like we did in the Green.
Don’t think any candle thing would be for any real man like you!
If it has flowers on it, rip them off.
Maybe Julie, Loretta or you bff would want.
It and you cannot be melted, it is too cold.
If you are melted, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOURSELF? You must be melted, that thing cannot talk to me.
To help you any further I would need to see said candle thang.
I leave for one day and you melt yourself, my, my!
@therealjrn I get a lot of pretty things from family, co-workers, neighbors, etc. They are all perfectly nice, but my house is tiny and what display space I have is filled with art and mementos of my travels. I’ve got no space for mass market tchotchkies. So they all end up getting regifted or donated.
I got nothin’.
@lisaviolet
Your kitties never got you a “present”?
@lisaviolet
@Barney
Lady can have a Co-Pet!
/giphy "pet rock"
@Barney
I could send you another rock if you want.
/image Texas rocks
@mflassy
FedEx?
@f00l
No. Rocks.
@mflassy
Ok.
@f00l
No. Texas.
Edit: Why would I want to give @Barney rocks from Oklahoma?
@mflassy
Why would you?
Because what @Barney has right now is mostly a collection of rocks from Kansas.
Surely you are a kind soul, and surely you would not leave her in that severely impovrished state, would you?
@f00l
Which is why I would send @Barney Texas rocks.
Although…
I have a few connections in Arizona. Maybe I’ll have rocks sent from there instead.
@mflassy I can send her a bag of sand from Florida.
/image bag of decorative sand
@mflassy Uluru
@RiotDemon
Does it come in purple?
@moondrake
Tried finding a fun gif about sneezing. I blame @therealjrn that this was the best I could do:
@mflassy
Forget rocks. Just send cash!
@Barney
Do you accept PayPal?
@mflassy Cash – nothing that can be traced.
@Barney
Bitcoin?
@mflassy I’m not sure about bitcoin. Of course, I guess I’ve already missed out on my first billion.
@Barney
So how would you like your gift?
Sure you don’t want rocks from Arizona?
@mflassy
Yeah. @Barney wants rocks from AZ. And rocks from OK.
Even if conscious awareness of this great lack will arrive only a great while after the rocks arrive.
Send, send!
@moondrake
Purple Uluru is the rock that’s missing from my skull.
It got loose and is trying to play keep-away from me.
@mflassy I’ve seen it.
/image purple sand
/image purple bag sand
@mflassy Nope.
@Barney
More …
Yep.
@Barney I can’t believe that I’m saying this, but I am jealous of your rock.
@lisaviolet Yep, getting a rock rocks.
@Barney
So you DO want a rock?
I should point out that it wouldn’t be a “valuable” rock.
@mflassy Diamonds are a girl’s best friend.
@Barney
Really?
Because my best friend is a toaster.
So rocks from Arizona sounds good?
If not? How about a purple agate?
@mflassy Oops, it’s time for the K-State football pregame show. (They wear purple!) Go Cats!
@mflassy
Those are some pretty nice purple rocks from Arizona.
They seem to have a few.
When I was gifted a crap load of apples one of those peelers saved my life… seriously… when doing bulk peeling they are the bomb.
Just telling me about the apple peeler was an awesome gift from a friend but I bought it myself. That thing saved me so much time and work when baking buckets of apples in the fall. Oh and it’s fun too!
Hoping not to see any of my family members posting here. Everyone got fidget spinners and loved them!
@callow Ha! I also gave everyone those as well. LOL
We could all take a lesson -
@KDemo
BTW I can’t see whatever you linked to.
I’ll mess with the browser controls later.
@KDemo
I’m skooled now.
@f00l - Oh, it’s another Twitter link. Did you see it? If you follow the link, there’s audio.
@KDemo
I can’t see it or follow it.
Some browser setting maybe. Later tho. Tired now.
@f00l - Sorry.
It’s a cute toddler unwrapping a gift. He reveals an avocado, and with a big smile says
“Avocado!!! Thanks!”
@KDemo
I think I have a fancy something set to block some social stuff on mobile.
I was damned tired last night. Apologies.
@f00l - Plus there’s a little baby in the background who appears to be stuck in a difficult yoga position.
The lesson to learn is:
If life hands you avocados, accept graciously. (Then make guac)
Also, if life gives you melons, you’re probably dyslexic.
@KDemo
I’ll take both!
/giphy avocado
@f00l @KDemo
Mandatory video:
@mflassy - Not . Gonna . Watch
Don’t need that in my head just now
(But it is awesome, have you ever listened all the way through?)
@KDemo
Two things I have always wondered:
•How many views did the video get before the coupon was used? (Of course though, being the first to watch it doesn’t mean anything, because somebody could have fast forwarded the video.)
•Who was it who used the coupon?
@mflassy I have a new question. What was the item they got?
@RiotDemon @lichme @del
Wootstalker only goes until 9/20/2012.
The video was from 8/25/2010.
Using the history of the Woot forums, by trying higher/lower (and having to remember which way was which), I ended up on page 896.
https://www.woot.com/forums/default.aspx?p=896
According to this, the item of the day was:
eComposter with spider base.
Now, if you look at the dates of the quality posts, the dates seem off.
Although if you go to this link from the forums, the dates are correct.
So it seems like it was the same item, but on different dates. I blame this on URL labeling.
@mflassy nice sleuthing. They actually do show the item in the video. Didn’t realize that’s what it was until I followed your link.
@mflassy
What really sucks is going to a planned family dinner and having your in-laws leave shortly after you arrive. After spending a lot of time, money, and effort into getting their gifts, having them not even wanting to take the time to open the gifts we got for them in front of us. Although their grand-daughter is absolutely adorable and she loves seeing them, they already exchanged gifts with their friends before they stopped in, and had to get back to open them. Then later bragging about the gifts you got there and how much they cost, all the while not getting your own daughter anything.
@lichme
/giphy sad panda
@lichme Dayum. I spot some nominees for the “Christmas Card Only” list.
I unloaded all the crap I got in BOCs and Fukus from the past year or two on the (7) nieces and nephews (along with a “real” present mixed in). There were some pretty good laughs (and confused looks).