@alacrity Children are ok. It's the parents who don't monitor/control their children who make me crazy. Do you not notice that your child is kicking my seat?
You surely overlooked the surly swine who carry on bags of reeking fast food that stink up the plane and leave the odeur of fast food grease on everyone AND their carry on luggage.
@JerseyFrank It's fun to bring food onto a plane that's so good that you almost regret what you are doing to the other sweet, civilized souls (and the asshats) who don't get any.
Fresh fish wrapped in newspaper, without a cooler in the overhead for a three and a half hour flight. Why they let it happen, no one will ever know. It was so bad they ended you removing it and taking to the back of the "plane" mid-flight.
I love to wait in the aisle behind someone repeatedly mashing a big ass bag into the overhead bin in attempt to get it to suddenly fit. My next favorite is when the person can't even lift their bag up there in the first place.
@metageist I'm 5'3" and I have poor upper body strength (past surgeries messed up my chest muscles), and I'm always so afraid of becoming your next-favorite person! Hasn't happened yet...
@metageist A few years ago I had recently had some major surgery and wasn't allowed to lift anything more than 10 pounds and nothing above my head. I went on a trip with my mother, who was 75 at the time. Mom had to help me get my carry on in the overhead bin. You should have seen the dirty looks I got.
I'm not bashing people having problems or needing help (and honestly, wtf don't people offer to help short people like @currawong???)… I'm talking about the ignorant SOBs that block the whole aisle while getting all the family luggage up there, move the kids around, adjust themselves, take on/off a sweater, ETC ETC ETC… all-the-while completely "clueless" that everyone else has to stop and wait for them. ARGH
@currawong@annab It sucks when you're unable to lift stuff, but I'm guessing since you are aware of it you aren't standing in the aisle in front of everyone while you think about how to get your bag up there. @haydesigner I usually help people too, as long as their bag is a normal size and not obviously too big and not going to fit. But I think the problem is only worse now because no one wants to pay those dumb $25 fees to check a bag :(
When people try to tell me I should put my only carry-on under my seat because "it will fit" and they want more room for their over sized bag. Um, no. I paid $25 to check my shit and brought the bare minimum as carry-on because I wanted the leg room. Fuck your giant roller bag.
@metaphore I have to buy a ticket for my luggage because of the tools I nearly always need to carry (to include a pocketknife and a multitool). The recent 'innovation' of charging to check a bag is pestiferous, obnoxious, and nasty. But that also leaves me with at most a coat and a laptop bag as carry on.
How about the people sitting toward the back of the plane using the overhead bins at the front? Put that shit next to you! If you don't want to lug it down the aisle - check the bag!
@looseneck This aggravates the hell out of me! While I recognize we're all supposed go row by row, it would make deplaning so much quicker if they'd let everyone who DIDN'T have carry on luggage off first. I'm down the aisle and off the plane in a heartbeat when given the chance. I have my handbag and computer bag stowed under my seat, yet I have to stand in the aisle waiting for backpack toting hipsters more interested in tweeting their arrival than helping the little abuelas glacially gathering their stuff from the overhead bins. Get off your phones, grab your gear and GO! And while I'm on this soapbox, if you're a slow walker, please keep to the sides of the gangway so those of us who are trying to make a connection or simply have longer legs can move past you. Same goes for the escalators and people movers. When you hear someone behind you say "on your left" please shift over to your RIGHT so the rest of us may pass on your left. Not everyone has all the time in the world.
And you families or packs of traveling teens, walking four and five abreast is akin to a rolling roadblock whether in the airport or on a city sidewalk. Knock that shit off!!! Don't be those people! Travelers need to maintain situational awareness!
@LaVikinga How about when those people suddenly come to a stop in the middle of the walkway front of you? That aggravates me more than anything. If you need to stop, move to the sides out of the traffic areas!
@looseneck Remember that scene from Ferris Bueller where his dad can't drive around the old lady tootling all over the road in her barge? Sigh. You have to wait for that window of opportunity and blow through.
@hallmike Depending on who the person is (I take age & demeanor into account), I've been known to plow into the back of them and then profusely apologize with an added Southern honeyed "Why I just never imagined someone would suddenly just come to a screeching halt in the middle of an extremely busy walkway/sidewalk, etc. I hope you're ok. Perhaps in the future, moving out of everyone's way might be safest for you, hon. " Because I can be that passive-aggressive bitch when your egregious self-centeredness unfairly impacts those around you. Bless their clueless, ill-mannered hearts.
SO many people are slobs when they travel. I don't want to see your hairy armpits, nor do I want to sit next to you while you clip your toenails & paint your finger nails, eat your anchovy & feta sandwich, or floss your teeth. Bathe, please. Don't make me wonder when was the last time you had some one on one time with shampoo and a bar of soap. Cover those open sores, too. A little dab of perfume or cologne? Hey, that's ok, but for the love of olfactory receptors everywhere, don't effing MARINATE IN IT!! Be polite to the aircrew. Whistling, snapping your fingers at them or calling them "girl" when you want their attention is flat out rude!. I have become my Gran, the Politeness Warrior.
@looseneck My rage is for the people ahead of the back seats who place their suitcases in the back bins. I prefer to sit in the very back of the plane, last row, and usually by the time I get there "my" bin and the surrounding bins have already been filled with forward-people's fucking oversized rolling monsterbags and I can't even shove in my little carry-on messenger bag. The only times I shuffle along in the herded pile-on to get through the gate is when I actually want some damned overhead room for my small bags. And then I have to hover protectively and watch for all the rollercase passengers who have no respect for other people's property and will blithely ram and slam and crush my bag around in order to shove their fucking shit into the bin. Grrrrrr.
Airlines have to notify passengers that their 26 inch bag is not a carry-on. And if its a 50 passenger embraer plane, the 22 incher won't fit, either. Make them check the bag. What annoyed me on my last flight was the 40" guitar case taking up the whole overhead, and the owner wasn't seated anywhere nearby.
@FroodyFrog I got to travel on some awesome bullet trains in Japan, and I am so so jealous we don't have that here in the US. Part of it is just the culture of Japanese people, but it was so efficient and organized and friendly to take trains everywhere.
@metageist Part of it is also the U.S. is a lot bigger than other places like Japan or France. France is about the size of Texas. Building a high speed line from Houston to Chicago is a much bigger project than Paris to Nice, and the journey's going to take a lot longer. Flying would still be faster.
@jqubed I would like some regaional high-speed rail connectivity. Using Texas as an example, say, DFW-Houston-Austin-San Antonio-Corpus Christi-Brownsville-Midland/Odessa-Lubbock-Amarillo-El Paso. With bus connections to smaller places. It's a PITA to fly, but a good train ride would be excellent.
I used to have no problem checking luggage. I pretty much had to with the amount of stuff I would pack. Once I got a good carryon bag and packing cubes and started using them, I HATE checking bags now. It's just such a hassle... Get there early to stand in line, arrive at destination, slug down to baggage claim, wait for stuff. Rinse and repeat for the flight home. Combine a carryon with PreCheck and I don't want to go back to the "old way".
Stuffing your bag in the front when you sit in the back, so the people who sit in front have to put their bags further back, so we all have to go opposite directions when we land, even though the narrow aisles prevent that, so everyone, including you, gets held up. You are a jerk and a moron.
(not sure where this fits in with the question but am guessing TSA is a real hassle now - a funny story of many years ago)
I am sure that TSA just wants to do their job and not be assholes but... and this was before 9-11 and I would NEVER dream of trying this now...
I had a pet hairless rat. They are really freaky looking but extremely gentle, especially since they are HAIRLESS - they cannot keep body heat so they just love to snuggle if not with one another but with humans just to keep warm.
I was living in San Francisco and had a couple weeks break to visit family in PA. I had a small pet travel house that fit perfectly in a backpack. Back then they didn't even x-ray backpacks! So I slipped Tootsie into the plane and she slept the whole flight.
I thought I would just carry her thru the same way with my sister and if we got caught say it was hers and she was bringing her back out. We did get caught and the asshole said it was OK to bring dogs thru but a sleeping rat would be a menace to a crowd if it was seen or if it got loose.
I explained it was a nocturnal animal and would be shit scared if it got loose... plus was hand trained to be a pet - AND I wanted to see a regulation written down where it said a pet dog could be brought into the airport but a pet rat could not! He called the real security - and these two young guys in official uniform come up and I tell them what is going down and show them tiny Tootsie. The one says he had pet rats when he was growing up and they are one of the most intelligent animals/pets he ever had and I could go on my way.
The people who put their nasty ass feet up the armrests on the seat in front of them. I always make sure to "accidentally" elbow their ankle really fucking hard when that happens.
All of the above should be an option!
I hate the airlines!!!!!!!
https://meh.com/forum/topics/time-to-vent-on-the-airlines
Wouldn't know. I've never been on a plane in my life.
If poison dart frogs were meant to fly...
@FroodyFrog I didn't know you're related to a penguin!
@FroodyFrog I'm glad I'm not the only one.
@narfcake
I happen to have a thing for penguins.
@FroodyFrog Right? Stupid government and their lists...
I have a rolling laptop bag that was designed SPECIFICALLY as an overhead compartment bag. They still question if it will fit EVERY TIME
@MsELizardBeth Probably because the airlines keep shrinking the overheads, millimeter by millimeter...
Also my biggest complaint is that people bogart the puke bags. I always know I will need at least once. Always.
Wooden airplane propeller.
People who spread their luggage along the length of the compartment and look offended when you try to move it to make room.
@trisk On one flight, one passenger took offense, to be rebutted with:
Do you park in two spaces all the time?
No, why?
Because you are!
I was on a commercial flight recently and a guy insisted on carrying on his (packed and ready) parachute. Argued with the TSA for an hour - and won.
https://apps.tsa.dhs.gov/mytsa/cib_results.aspx?search=parachute
Made everyone a little nervous. Just check that shit at the gate, you're not going to get it strapped on in case of explosive decompression . . .
Filling the overheads completely when I don't even have the space under the seat in front of me to stow my bag.
children
@alacrity Children are ok. It's the parents who don't monitor/control their children who make me crazy. Do you not notice that your child is kicking my seat?
@alacrity My dog is smaller and better behaved than most six year old children, yet she has to travel in the cargo hold...just sayin.
Gremlins…
@brhfl I prefer the newer version
@cinoclav me thinks the gremlin is messing with you.
@brhfl There's... a man... on the wing of the plane!
You surely overlooked the surly swine who carry on bags of reeking fast food that stink up the plane and leave the odeur of fast food grease on everyone AND their carry on luggage.
@RobotSkeleton I like to travel with a really ripe Camembert.
@strongeagle Fetch hither the fromage de la Belle France!
@placeholder It's a bit runny, sir...
@RobotSkeleton I brought an Italian hoagie (sub) on my last cross-country flight. It was glorious.
@JerseyFrank
It's fun to bring food onto a plane that's so good that you almost regret what you are doing to the other sweet, civilized souls (and the asshats) who don't get any.
Fresh fish wrapped in newspaper, without a cooler in the overhead for a three and a half hour flight. Why they let it happen, no one will ever know. It was so bad they ended you removing it and taking to the back of the "plane" mid-flight.
I love to wait in the aisle behind someone repeatedly mashing a big ass bag into the overhead bin in attempt to get it to suddenly fit. My next favorite is when the person can't even lift their bag up there in the first place.
@metageist I'm 5'3" and I have poor upper body strength (past surgeries messed up my chest muscles), and I'm always so afraid of becoming your next-favorite person! Hasn't happened yet...
@metageist A few years ago I had recently had some major surgery and wasn't allowed to lift anything more than 10 pounds and nothing above my head. I went on a trip with my mother, who was 75 at the time. Mom had to help me get my carry on in the overhead bin. You should have seen the dirty looks I got.
@metageist… THIS
I'm not bashing people having problems or needing help (and honestly, wtf don't people offer to help short people like @currawong???)… I'm talking about the ignorant SOBs that block the whole aisle while getting all the family luggage up there, move the kids around, adjust themselves, take on/off a sweater, ETC ETC ETC… all-the-while completely "clueless" that everyone else has to stop and wait for them.
ARGH
@currawong @annab It sucks when you're unable to lift stuff, but I'm guessing since you are aware of it you aren't standing in the aisle in front of everyone while you think about how to get your bag up there.
@haydesigner I usually help people too, as long as their bag is a normal size and not obviously too big and not going to fit. But I think the problem is only worse now because no one wants to pay those dumb $25 fees to check a bag :(
anybody who has something too big for their own damn lap
Airports and airlines are crimes against humanity.
If you want your luggage to fly, first buy a house in an airpark. Then buy your own airplane. Problem solved.
Or you could overnight it on FedEx.
@2many2no Because overnighting it is so cheap and affordable to everyone.
@haydesigner But FedEx will pick up, so you never have to go to the airport.
@haydesigner As much as the luggage fees cost, depending on what you're shipping it might not be that different.
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/airplane_layout
@narfcake And then we have this one
When people try to tell me I should put my only carry-on under my seat because "it will fit" and they want more room for their over sized bag.
Um, no. I paid $25 to check my shit and brought the bare minimum as carry-on because I wanted the leg room. Fuck your giant roller bag.
@metaphore I have to buy a ticket for my luggage because of the tools I nearly always need to carry (to include a pocketknife and a multitool). The recent 'innovation' of charging to check a bag is pestiferous, obnoxious, and nasty. But that also leaves me with at most a coat and a laptop bag as carry on.
Placing one's bag in parallel when it clearly goes in perpendicularly to the storage area. It fucks up the maximum use of the space.
Not obeying the signs that say how to properly place your luggage in the overhead bins.
Dressing like a total slob and treating the flight like a sleepover.
@DonberKon what's wrong with that? Better to sleep than be awake annoying people
How about the people sitting toward the back of the plane using the overhead bins at the front? Put that shit next to you! If you don't want to lug it down the aisle - check the bag!
@looseneck yeah- if you don't need the shit on the actual flight check your bag.
@looseneck This aggravates the hell out of me! While I recognize we're all supposed go row by row,
it would make deplaning so much quicker if they'd let everyone who DIDN'T have carry on luggage off first. I'm down the aisle and off the plane in a heartbeat when given the chance.
I have my handbag and computer bag stowed under my seat, yet I have to stand in the aisle waiting for backpack toting hipsters more interested in tweeting their arrival than helping the little abuelas glacially gathering their stuff from the overhead bins. Get off your phones, grab your gear and GO!
And while I'm on this soapbox, if you're a slow walker, please keep to the sides of the gangway so those of us who are trying to make a connection or simply have longer legs can move past you. Same goes for the escalators and people movers. When you hear someone behind you say "on your left" please shift over to your RIGHT so the rest of us may pass on your left. Not everyone has all the time in the world.
And you families or packs of traveling teens, walking four and five abreast is akin to a rolling roadblock whether in the airport or on a city sidewalk. Knock that shit off!!! Don't be those people! Travelers need to maintain situational awareness!
@LaVikinga Are you me? Holy shit do I fly in a rage when people amble along in front of me taking up the whole walkway.
@LaVikinga How about when those people suddenly come to a stop in the middle of the walkway front of you? That aggravates me more than anything. If you need to stop, move to the sides out of the traffic areas!
@looseneck Remember that scene from Ferris Bueller where his dad can't drive around the old lady tootling all over the road in her barge? Sigh.
You have to wait for that window of opportunity and blow through.
@hallmike Depending on who the person is (I take age & demeanor into account), I've been known to plow into the back of them and then profusely apologize with an added Southern honeyed "Why I just never imagined someone would suddenly just come to a screeching halt in the middle of an extremely busy walkway/sidewalk, etc. I hope you're ok. Perhaps in the future, moving out of everyone's way might be safest for you, hon. " Because I can be that passive-aggressive bitch when your egregious self-centeredness unfairly impacts those around you. Bless their clueless, ill-mannered hearts.
SO many people are slobs when they travel. I don't want to see your hairy armpits, nor do I want to sit next to you while you clip your toenails & paint your finger nails, eat your anchovy & feta sandwich, or floss your teeth.
Bathe, please. Don't make me wonder when was the last time you had some one on one time with shampoo and a bar of soap. Cover those open sores, too.
A little dab of perfume or cologne? Hey, that's ok, but for the love of olfactory receptors everywhere, don't effing MARINATE IN IT!!
Be polite to the aircrew. Whistling, snapping your fingers at them or calling them "girl" when you want their attention is flat out rude!.
I have become my Gran, the Politeness Warrior.
@looseneck My rage is for the people ahead of the back seats who place their suitcases in the back bins. I prefer to sit in the very back of the plane, last row, and usually by the time I get there "my" bin and the surrounding bins have already been filled with forward-people's fucking oversized rolling monsterbags and I can't even shove in my little carry-on messenger bag. The only times I shuffle along in the herded pile-on to get through the gate is when I actually want some damned overhead room for my small bags. And then I have to hover protectively and watch for all the rollercase passengers who have no respect for other people's property and will blithely ram and slam and crush my bag around in order to shove their fucking shit into the bin. Grrrrrr.
Airlines have to notify passengers that their 26 inch bag is not a carry-on. And if its a 50 passenger embraer plane, the 22 incher won't fit, either. Make them check the bag. What annoyed me on my last flight was the 40" guitar case taking up the whole overhead, and the owner wasn't seated anywhere nearby.
Planes just sound like a hassle.
@FroodyFrog they can be. But if you want/need to be somewhere that's not in easy driving distance, whadya gonna do?
@AnnaB
Meh.
Hasn't happened until now.
@FroodyFrog I got to travel on some awesome bullet trains in Japan, and I am so so jealous we don't have that here in the US. Part of it is just the culture of Japanese people, but it was so efficient and organized and friendly to take trains everywhere.
@FroodyFrog The world is a beautiful and interesting place. Don't limit yourself.
@AnnaB
Oh, don't get me wrong, there are plenty of places I'd like to see.
I just haven't gotten around to visiting any of them yet.
@FroodyFrog compared to a road trip, it is a dream.
@metageist Part of it is also the U.S. is a lot bigger than other places like Japan or France. France is about the size of Texas. Building a high speed line from Houston to Chicago is a much bigger project than Paris to Nice, and the journey's going to take a lot longer. Flying would still be faster.
@jqubed
I would like some regaional high-speed rail connectivity. Using Texas as an example, say, DFW-Houston-Austin-San Antonio-Corpus Christi-Brownsville-Midland/Odessa-Lubbock-Amarillo-El Paso. With bus connections to smaller places. It's a PITA to fly, but a good train ride would be excellent.
@AnnaB What am I going to do? Live Free & Drive Hard.
I used to have no problem checking luggage. I pretty much had to with the amount of stuff I would pack. Once I got a good carryon bag and packing cubes and started using them, I HATE checking bags now. It's just such a hassle... Get there early to stand in line, arrive at destination, slug down to baggage claim, wait for stuff. Rinse and repeat for the flight home. Combine a carryon with PreCheck and I don't want to go back to the "old way".
Stuffing your bag in the front when you sit in the back, so the people who sit in front have to put their bags further back, so we all have to go opposite directions when we land, even though the narrow aisles prevent that, so everyone, including you, gets held up. You are a jerk and a moron.
Haha the damn kid I voted for is in last.
(not sure where this fits in with the question but am guessing TSA is a real hassle now - a funny story of many years ago)
I am sure that TSA just wants to do their job and not be assholes but... and this was before 9-11 and I would NEVER dream of trying this now...
I had a pet hairless rat. They are really freaky looking but extremely gentle, especially since they are HAIRLESS - they cannot keep body heat so they just love to snuggle if not with one another but with humans just to keep warm.
I was living in San Francisco and had a couple weeks break to visit family in PA. I had a small pet travel house that fit perfectly in a backpack. Back then they didn't even x-ray backpacks! So I slipped Tootsie into the plane and she slept the whole flight.
I thought I would just carry her thru the same way with my sister and if we got caught say it was hers and she was bringing her back out. We did get caught and the asshole said it was OK to bring dogs thru but a sleeping rat would be a menace to a crowd if it was seen or if it got loose.
I explained it was a nocturnal animal and would be shit scared if it got loose... plus was hand trained to be a pet - AND I wanted to see a regulation written down where it said a pet dog could be brought into the airport but a pet rat could not! He called the real security - and these two young guys in official uniform come up and I tell them what is going down and show them tiny Tootsie. The one says he had pet rats when he was growing up and they are one of the most intelligent animals/pets he ever had and I could go on my way.
The people who put their nasty ass feet up the armrests on the seat in front of them. I always make sure to "accidentally" elbow their ankle really fucking hard when that happens.