Parents, What's Your Baby Registry Must Have?
35@Humper and I are expecting a bundle of adorkableness in early February, 2016. (It'd be super weird if we'd planned for a specific month in 2017...) We've got most of the registry filled out - but I figured I'd ask you awesome people for advice.
What is a "must have" for you?
What did you end up not using at all?
We plan to use cloth diapers & wipes.
We also plan to avoid using formula if at all possible.
Also... looks like it's a girl!
- 71 comments, 98 replies
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A Nanny ;) But congratulations to both of you on your upcoming bundle of joy!!!!
@thumperchick Seriously, I was going to recommend a diaper genie 2 (disposable diapers) - a stink godsend. But you are doing the environment good with cloth and I will try to think of something else :)
@mfladd The CD's don't stink much - you use a cloth laundry bag for them and launder every day or 2. Keeps the smell to minimum. Besides you rinse out the worst of it before tossing in the laundry bag.
@Thumperchick oh, you misunderstood. I meant the Genie was a stink godsend for disposables. Holy Crap those things were bad without it!
@mfladd we use a big diaper pail and grocery bags to keep the stink to a minimum. Then we don't have to take it out every 2 or so days. When we smell it it goes out.
@mfladd I followed what you meant, just felt like adding in one of the few pieces of info I actually have!
@Thumperchick p.s. owners manual is not included; you will wish it was once that baby comes home. But you will be a great mom - no worries!
Oh my gosh, @Thumperchick, I'm so excited and happy for you!
I just realized - you have a Tiny Tummy Mummy!
If you can use a diaper service for the first few months, you'll appreciate it.
@KDemo Nah. Diaper service kills part of the cost savings of going cloth for us.
@Thumperchick one of my coworkers went cloth. For the first month or so they needed disposable diapers. The cloth wouldn't fit right. And then they used a service for the first few months. Why? I've heard the first few months with cloth are the worst On the diapers. My hats off to you doing cloth. We thought of it. But daycare would only do disposable. So....
@Thumperchick plus, unless the service picks them up by bicycle and washes them with cold water, and it's organic cotton, disposable ends up more bio friendly in the big picture.
My wife had a 14 year old when I married her so I can't give any baby advice but wanted to congratulate the two of you on the great news!!
@hallmike God that must have hurt.
@trilliongrams
You need a fair amount of overpriced plastic, otherwise your child will never understand colors or space or time.
Congratulations!!
I'm not a parent, but I do want to chime in with another big CONGRATULATIONS! How exciting!
@becca Me too! My hubbie came with a 12 year old girl and that was enough for me :)
I have no advice to add but wanted to say congrats to you both!!!
Congratulations to you two!
Every baby shower I have gone to, every mom seems to chime in when the Boppy gets opened--sounds like a must have
@stevenstepheni @tHimperchick I agree, Boppy pillow and Boppy lounger.
@stevenstepheni Extremely helpful when feeding the kid - makes it so much more comfortable for mommy.
@stevenstepheni we also used our boppy as a means of allowing our young neices and husband's grandmother to "hold" the baby with extra safety/support.
I made this short list a while back .... All are must haves: http://www.amazon.com/registry/wishlist/1DXQ2VMONPLZF
Also, don't buy baby socks. And you will use very few newborn sized anythings. Just buy larger sizes, you will probably get a ton of clothes as gifts anyway.
I should also mention that the baby chef is sooooo worth it (even for breastmilk). When you drag yourself out of bed at 3am for a feeding and all you have to do is pour in milk and press one button.... Trust me, you'll love that gadget.
@mkapushion I kind of figure I'll leave all the clothing stuff to whatever people want to buy. I've yet to see a first time mom not get a ridiculous amount of clothes at a shower.
How useful is the moses basket, really?
@Thumperchick I got a Moses basket as a gift and didn't expect to use it at all.... We used it all the time. The nice thing about it is that you can easily carry it all over the house and set the baby wherever... On the couch next to you, on the bed while doing laundry... Up and down stairs without waking... Etc. You can't move a bassinet or crib and I was always worried the baby would roll off of the couch... So it was surprisingly helpful.
@mkapushion ahh, ok. I think we'll have most of that covered. Cradle downstairs, portable couch napper wherever, swing upstairs...
@Thumperchick I should also note that my little girl was a terrible sleeper, so anything that helped her stay undisturbed while napping was awesome. She would wake up anytime you tried to move her, so it was great to have the basket. You may luck out and have a good sleeper, so it may not be as helpful.
@mkapushion I have to disagree with the thermometer on your list.. It would be nice for a quick check, but every time we call our pediatrician they want to know a rectal temperature..
@kadagan We refused to do rectal. I ended up getting a different one. we went with this one.. it works.. but you have to do a few different ones in case the baby moved or whatnot. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00C6FGG9Q?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=oh_aui_search_detailpage
@kadagan Our doc never required a rectal temp. That said, I would still recommend the temporal one, even if you want to occasionally go with the rectal temp. It allows for a quick check and won't disturb the baby. Nothing worse than waking up a sick baby. We have been very pleased with the accuracy of the temporal one. Our kiddo was sick for what seemed like a year straight (thanks, daycare!) and we used it all the time.
Omg congrats!!!!
@thumperchick CONGRATS!!!
Seems like just yesterday. From my own personal experience, we got overwhelmed with wayyy to much stuff. We have so many odds and ends and we really only use like 25% of the stuff.
However, that 25% that gets used, we use the fuck outta it. Get quality, it will last and you'll be happy you invested into it! Also, save yourself the space and buy multi purpose items. Again, costs more, but worth it.
Congrats on the fantastic news!
Love studerc and chaoscatapult.
First off: Congratulations!
I'm not sure how well it will work for cloth diapers, but my favorite thing was the Eddie Bauer portable changing pad. I do hope you have a top load washer... One of my friends found out that front load washers don't get cloth diapers clean.
Another thing for breastfeeding mom's, I loved my infinity scarf/breastfeeding cover. If you are crafty, you can find patterns on Pinterest. Or look up Hold Me Close on Etsy (she's from my hometown, and makes awesome scarves!
@MrsBeckett we do have a top loader! I've heard of several CDers with front-loaders and some of the craziness they have to do to make it work.
Many newborns are too big for newborn clothes. Let me echo the advice about acquiring clothes for older babies. See if your area has a baby exchange.
No, no, not a place where you take your baby when you decide that you'd like a quieter one. These are places where you can take the clothing that your little one wore for 3 weeks, and trade it for larger clothing of about the same wear.
I'd also recommend finding one of those slings where baby rides next to your heart. I'm always a bit sad when I see a wee one in one of those plastic car seats, crying. Physical contact is important. Years ago (more than I care to think about), I had friends who went traditional, and used backboards (sometimes called cradleboards). Those were the most peaceful, sweet-natured babies I ever saw.
Find latches NOW for all your cupboards. I used rubber bands, and my daughter entertained herself for hours playing "music" on them. Later, make a "safe" cupboard, and put a couple of pots and a wooden spoon or two.
I'm sure you've already been thinking about baby proofing the house, of course. You're a sensible kind of woman.
I'll bet anything you'll see me here tomorrow, with even more ideas...
XXOO
@Shrdlu every kid in my family has fond memories of the tupperware cupboard, we even have pictures of the 2 youngest (twins) asleep in it. 1 on the top shelf, 1 on the bottom.
How could I forget to wake up @LaVikinga? I'm sure she'll put her two cents in while I'm still stumbling around making coffee tomorrow.
@Thumperchick Congrats!
After four rounds of the baby process, one thing we really appreciated was a high quality and light weight stroller.
Definitely not those crappy cheapo umbrella strollers.
One-handed release. Stable. Sometimes not inexpensive. Graco used to make (our oldest offspring is 25 yrs old) one that was less than a hundred bucks but really well built.
@RedOak We definitely did the stroller testing! How does it move? Are the brakes useful? The one handed release was what made the Graco travel system end up on the list. I really dig the Britax carseats, but Graco made the click connect thing sooo easy, had good safety ratings, and that stroller was really easy to handle.
@Thumperchick We have/had (since the baby is now a toddler and is almost 30 lbs) - the Chicco Keyfit30 system. It was so easy to go from car to daycare to stroller (although the stroller is a bit large - we have a SummerLite 3d infant stroller - which once I remember how to close it is great ... but as soon as the kid walks, it is so tempting just to let him tire himself out).
@Thumperchick we have a graco click connect system and it is awesome. 1 yr old and he's no where near the 35 lb mark. We ended up getting the 4 wheeled version. My friend from high school got the 3 (we have kids 3 months apart. Weird) the 4 wheeled will go straight back for him to sleep. 3 won't. But 3 is easier in stores to navigate and off-roading (parks,grass). We ended up buying 2 more bases to make it easy in each car for @tiwanaku, myself, and @tiwanaku's mother (she is closest to daycare {1 mile} and helps us occasionally by picking him up)
@RedOak in Denver, used BOBs go for $250+. Used. Crazy.
@sohmageek same setup we have, though he has long since outgrown that carseat. (We mostly use the stroller as a pack mule to get all of his stuff in and out of the hotel! )
Congrats T-Humper household!
A baby carrier! This has been the only way I've been able to get anything done with my clingy napless wonder. And I find it easier than using a stroller in most situations. I used a Boba wrap for the first two months, then moved into a Beco, but I feel like Ergo is the most popular choice. If you have a local babywearers group (yeah, I didn't know that this was a thing either) they can give you lots of tips and will likely have different carriers for you to try out!
I'd personally skip getting a changing table, as it's kind of a unitasker. We've just secured a changing pad on a dresser and it works great! And I second (or third or fourth) the advice to avoid newborn clothes. In fact, what worked with my older son was to mostly avoid every other size. So for example we bought heavily in the 0-3 month size, very little in the 3-6, and heavily in the 6-9. The sizes have some overlap, and babies grow so fast that there's only like two weeks where they're in stuff that's a bit too big or small.
@lucidlemur I managed to score a sturdy changing table and a very gently used swing (the exact model we wanted) for $50 a few weeks ago.
A friend already hooked us up with one wrap (the name eludes me right now) and I like the easy bring for the moby styles. @Humper was poking around the structured carriers, but he's leaning to the wraps, too, because they're pretty universal and loads cheaper.
@Thumperchick but maybe make sure to have 1 or 2 new born things and 0-3 to take to the hospital because my sister's baby was "supposed" to be 8+lbs at a week late turned out to be 6.5lbs and the clean outfits she brought to the hospital for pictures and going home were ginormous on the kid. It's amusing now but with the hormones and all at the time it really was upsetting mama.
@Thumperchick some of the structured carriers are really bad for baby hips. Read reviews before you get one.
Ditto on the congrats! I personally LOVED closet size organizers. Like you said, you will get tons of clothes in a range of sizes, and the sucky days are when you pull out an adorable outfit only to find it was last weeks size. So although you feel like a dept store, these dividers allow you to sort clothes by size. And the baby size hangers (purchased plastic ones not the free with the outfit) work not only for teeny stuff, but all the way into "they dressed themselves" land. http://www.amazon.com/Little-Animal-Lover-Closet-Dividers/dp/B00P0HMUZQ/ref=sr_1_4?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1442305993&sr=1-4&keywords=closet+dividers
CONGRATULATIONS. I'll get a list later today :)
I adopted mine at nearly 10 so no baby advice from me but congrats and welcome to the soon to be world of your life has changed dramatically LOL
I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' babies, but I'm very happy for you. Congrats!!!!
@THUMPERCHICK BABY!??!! Aw, YES!!!
Our first was a baby girl. Bright, intelligent, easy sleeper who would eat just about everything. We were so enthralled we decided to do it again. Had boy-girl twins. That's when life got really interesting and we realized God had a horrible sense of humor.
This is a long one and full of advice. The most important is this: Take care of yourself first. Try to shower every day, slap on some mascara & lipstick if that used to be a thing you did before the baby. I realized early on if I could at least do this little thing for me, it perked me up when I caught a glimpse of my reflection. "Hey, I'm doing pretty ok!" It's a mind/body trick.
This is something else entirely & is so important: Post-partum depression can and does sneak up on you. It is never, ever something to be embarrassed about. Hormones play hell on our body after we give birth.
Please, sweet girl, pay attention to how you are feeling both physically & emotionally. If you can tell you're not creeping back to normal, *do NOT f*ck around with this*. Go back to your OB/GYN. INSIST on proper care to get your body back on track. Do NOT allow yourself to be brushed aside with "oh, that's normal." Slight mood swings, tiredness, yes. Normal. Barely functioning? NOT NORMAL!
Now, for the rest.
Starting right now, make noise. Get her used to the vacuum cleaner, the stove fan, the television, play music, and keep it up once she arrives. A baby who can sleep in spite of her surroundings is a wonderful thing.
Simethicone drops Keep some on hand. Breast feeding is best because, well, duh, but on those rare occasions you have to supplement or you've eaten something that disagrees with her system, the drops work wonders for gas/colic.
Onesies. Get lots of them! Many. Scads. Bunches. Easy on/off & perfect for layering. We liked the baby night gowns with the snap closures at the base, but those are hard to find.
You absolutely cannot have enough crib sheets and blankets. I was a fan of the stretchy, jersey sheets. They seem softer & warmer. Yes, those coordinated ones are adorable, but way over priced. Stock up on basic colors. Flannel swaddling blankets were great, too. Light weight, warm. They can be rolled to use as a support, as a emergency diaper changing, pad, as a nursing shield, etc. Made fabulous dust rags later on.
Baby wash cloths are soft & cute. places like Walmart sell wash cloths in big bulk stacks for just a few dollars. Get a few stacks. Babies for some odd reason can get kinda grimey even before they start solids food. Cheap wash cloths are great at scrubbing off the day's evidence. White cloths can be easily bleached.
Inexpensive laundry baskets. They'll help on laundry day (with a baby, this can be every day). They do double duty as carry-alls for supplies/toys.
Put your foot down about visitors and phone calls from well meaning friends and family. Let the answering machine take ALL your calls.
Think about using a service like Blue Apron to deliver ingredients for meals so you don't have to shop as much.
Set up a rhythm for bed time. Get a small bookshelf. Buy her a new book every month. Build that library for her and for future siblings. Read to her every night.
Know now you're going to get child raising advice from everyone. EVERY. ONE. Even from the childless. Listen to your hearts. YOU two are her parents. As long as she is taught to be honest, kind, polite, self-sufficient, and responsible, the battle to raise a decent little human is half won. Be consistent in all things. No means no. Actions have consequences. Follow through on your words. Please. If nothing else. Do this for your daughter.
Congratulations, sweetie! You and your honey are in for the ride of your lives! Hang on to your hats and have fun!
TL;DR: Keep lots of the basics on hand. Take care of yourself first & foremost. Be a PARENT, but have fun & keep your sense of humor.
@LaVikinga awesome advice! We got tons of advice. Be it asked for or not.
@thumperchick just do what makes sense for you! Everyone is different. Oh and I have a little for
@humper. Mehconium is not fun. But get it almost instantly and it will save your fingernails from scraping it off of sensitive parts. If it gets squished in... I've heard it's not fun at all. I think the creepiest part yet most emotional was when I cut the cord. I wanted to ask for something sharper. It was more of a sawing instead of cutting. Surgical scissors aren't all that great there.
@LaVikinga
@thumperchick
// Know now you're going to get child raising advice from everyone. EVERY. ONE. //
Do not, under any circumstances, bottle feed your baby at the Whole Foods Café
Unless you want to hear from about 87 people how you're doing it wrong
Was waiting to meet my wife with our three month old
Well, not really ours at the time… Foster parents. Two years later, we ended up adopting, but at the time, it was just a temporary, emergency situation ... One that kept getting worse and worse
Anyway ... Had half a dozen people tell me I should be breast-feeding
Obvious retort is that I'm a guy… But they were waiting for that, so they could tell me I could get a pump and all that business
The first five I just ignored, but by the sixth I was getting a little pissed
So I just said, breast-feeding… Good idea… Except mom is still using crystal meth and OxyContin, so so I better run that by our doctor and the caseworker
Yeah, you're going to get a lot of free, unsolicited advice
@sohmageek A hunting/skinning knife might do the trick with the cord, but goodness knows, it'd scare the scrubs off the staff!
@LaVikinga Thank you!
@LaVikinga
You got a bunch of 'em? Now, double down on 'em. Get more.
I always thought that it was pretty wasteful to get a bunch of clothes that the baby is going to wear for a few weeks, and then grow out of.
True story - there are times when the baby is going to shit out more than their pre-shit body mass. They are going to do this 5 times within a 24 hour period.
Cloth diapers are not going to contain that. Disposable diapers are not going to contain that. Nuclear reactor cores are not going to contain that. You will need clean clothes for baby after each colon blow. You don't have enough.
Note: Repainting the room may become necessary.
@G1 Testify! How can something so small contain so much crap? It's like their insides are tiny TARDISes; bigger on the inside to hold more poop than you could possibly imagine!
Congrats!
I remember like it was yesterday (25 years ago), that exciting and scary feeling leaving the hospital with our first child.
"What did we do? How are we qualified to care for this helpless little person?"
And then by the time we arrived home something kicked in and our genetic programming took over.
Kids are amazingly resilient. Love them. Set boundaries for them. Read to them. Don't use the TV or video games to baby-sit them. The world will be good.
Nothing can match the joy (and pain) of raising children.
Congratulations! No advice. How exciting! A new Mehtizen!
One thing? Swaddling blankets to sleep in.
Summer Infant SwaddleMe Adjustable Infant Wrap, Sports, 3 Count https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003JHYDIQ/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_wnc-vbH2SY43AA
They're amazing until your baby is able to roll to their back on their own.
@DJ mine HATED being swaddled from day one.
@MsELizardBeth a friend of mine has a 2 month old who haaaaaaaaaaates being swaddled. He loved it for the first week and refused to tolerate it ever since.
@Thumperchick when the pediatrician came by to meet him, he insisted that all babies love swaddling and that I was doing it wrong, so he swaddled him and our 8 hour old baby screamed like he was going to die. As soon as his hands and one foot were released he was fine. I told the pediatrician that the kid had spent the last several weeks trying to stretch and couldn't, so why would he want to go through that again.... before that he spent most of his time stretched out sideways with his feet pressed into my broken rib. Jerk. (Otherwise he's pretty perfect)
I agree with @DJ about needing swaddling blankets (although some babies don't like it as much).. I credit good swaddling blankets for the reason both of my kids started sleeping through the night in less than 2 weeks.
I friend gave me a Miracle Swaddle Blanket when my son was born, and I swear by that thing! We bought an extra (plus a pink one once my daughter was born), and I don't think we could have made it without them!! My son still used it until he was like 10 months!! He was too tall, so we left his feet out and just swaddled his arms. He slept so well!
We give these as baby gifts to everyone we care about! Definitely worth getting!!
@kadagan I forgot to say CONGRATULATIONS!!!
@thumperchick @humper
IF you ever see this... http://kids.woot.com/blog/post/benji-the-bear-aromatherapy-bundle-by-the-happy-company
Order 3! The Cozy keeper is the only one that is good in the bunch (well that we need more of) 1 for your baby, 1 for backup, and 1 for me! Raylan loves that... and If I could find a new one, I'd happily pay for it.
@sohmageek I bought that a few years ago for a friend's baby shower! (From that sale, even...)
@Thumperchick a co-worker did for us too. Raylan LOVES the little security blanket part. But he smells after a day or two. And we are worried we will kill it by washing it too frequently. We almost lost it one day too. So we are looking for a backup or two. If you know anyone with a new one they would sell. I'd buy it gladly! :) once they get a "best friend" security item. They are like gold. And then you find out you can't get them anywhere anymore. So when you do find that security blanket get a few. Stash them. You will be glad later.
@sohmageek "Raylan?" Justified fan?
@LaVikinga The wife is.
Congratulations!
I'll echo everyone with the babywearing devices, and the backpacks for when munchkins are bigger. You cannot go wrong with those. Also echoing with the onsies and washcloths- you cannot have too many of each with them.
My personal recommendation- for about the first three or so months, baby sets the schedule. Baby asleep? You sleep. Baby wants to eat now? Feed away. After the first few months, we then started gently nudging our son to our timeline. It worked fairly well for us, and he turned out to be a rather flexible child for regards to meals and naps.
Above all, learn your child. Once you know where your kiddo's boundaries are, you can then work with them, and not against them. That is extremely hard, and even at 17, his boundaries change daily. We just keep working away.
And of course, love them!
Some other odds & ends:
Buy a vaporizer now rather than later at 1 in the morning in a wild-eyed panic. While you're at it, get a nose-sucker-outer with a really LONG thin tip and don't be afraid to get all up in there to suck out the gunk.
Baby CPR. Practice. Maybe on your animals?
Think about adding extra handsets to your cordless home phone.
Flat-headedness happens. Don't forget to put her on her belly sometimes, too.
Toilet locks. Find some good ones. Flushing Parties can be expensive.
Sunlight is good for kids. Unless she's going to be out for an extended period of time, go easy on the sun screen.
Oh, yeah. Little girls will pee like a danged fountain during a diaper change. Learned the hard way it just wasn't the little guys.
And speaking of diapers, know this ugly fact early: it is entirely possible for a normal, innocent, sweet baby to poop so much and with such a force that it reaches the back of their neck. Seriously. The back of their neck. Poop. Sticky, what-IS-that-smell, dear-god-in-heaven-what-did-you-eat stinky poop.
@LaVikinga "Toilet locks. Find some good ones. Flushing Parties can be expensive."
The true voice of experience speaks !
congrats to you and @Humper! one thing NOT to get right away is a bottle warmer. we didn't have one initially and warmed the bottles manually. during one of the 2am feedings, i was on duty. i was pretty out of it and i completely forgot to warm up the breast milk. the kid still drank it with no problem. so, that saved us a whole lot of time. give it a test run and see if she will take a cold bottle.
for a child carrier, we used a moby wrap. yes, i used it as well. it came in really handy when i worked a month from home when my wife went back to work. i would wrap him up in it, he would fall asleep and i could go about and do my work/have meetings.
@carl669 We never warmed bottles.. We had a car bottle warmer, and a home one.. and never even opened the packages.. lol..
We also had a wipe warmer, and got rid of it before the second kid.. It was nice, but I had to plug it into an outlet on a timer because leaving it on all the time dried the wipes out WAY too quickly!!
@carl669 what's this "bottle warmer" of which you speak? All this new-fangled baby tech. Amazing.
@RedOak i think it's just an expensive way to run hot water around a bottle. i assume there's some kind of timer/temp sensor so the milk doesn't get too hot.
@carl669 TIL you can give a baby cold milk. I don't have kids, but always thought heating was a necessary step.
@becca i guess some babies won't drink the cold milk. i guess if they are also breastfeeding, they might be used to warm milk? luckily, our boy wasn't picky about that. i don't think there's any downside to giving cold milk/breast milk.
@carl669 My littlest, now almost 6 months, always acted liked I was trying to poison her by giving her cold milk. 1st time was in an attempt to stop crying quickly. 2nd and 3rd attempt were to verify the first attempt was indeed the cold milk she disliked.
It was actually quite adorable to see her so repulsed, I could of done without the look of: are you a complete idiot, she gave me afterwards.
Thanks for all of the well wishes and advice, everyone!
Congrats! You want these
and lots of these
@DaveInSoCal meh... my son used pacifiers for about a month... then went to thumb... then just gave up on the sucking... well other than cloth, but that's starting to calm down now too...
@DaveInSoCal Although they seem like a magical invention, take it from one who wasted countless hours looking for missing pacifiers, and suffered through tearful times while trying to break them of the binky habit, I can't recommend them.
Don't get little ones hooked. Let them find their own fingers. Those aren't so easy to lose.
@LaVikinga I planned on not using pacifiers. Within 12 hours of bringing my daughter home I was frantically trying to get her to use one to stop the crying. She never liked it.
@sammydog01 my son liked them at first. But then he discovered his fingers. So. It was funny though. He was trying to get the whole hand in his mouth at first. Then teeth came. And the fingers don't usually end up in his mouth anymore. Teeth hurt. Baby oragel is an amazing invention!
My kids are all older now. But when they were babies I always read not to use pacifiers while breast feeding. So there is no nipple confusion. Now of course they have all different shapes, so who knows. But my kids never used one, and that was fine since I never had to pick them up, find them, wash them, etc.
Congrats. I'm not a parent but here's what I think would help:
Ear plugs
4x your favorite handle of hard alcohol.
Case of ZZZquil
@Bogie I guess not.;-)
Ear plugs - not necessary since your auditory senses eventually become numb (trained?). Either that or too many rock concerts.
Hard alcohol - have an entire shelf of it, much of it leftover from undergrad decades ago. Exception made for Jack Daniels as well as Gin. OK, Vodka too.
ZZZquil - plenty of other inducements to sleep. Like deprivation.
Taking this T-Humperchick thing a little too far, eh? I would make a paternity test from Irk the first item on your list.
@thumperchick But seriously.. congrats and take all the help you can get from friends and relatives for the first few weeks. You'll be glad you did.
Congrats! @JonT made fun of "Moo Baa La La La" but it was one of my daughter's favorites. You're supposed to read to babies and Sandra Boynton's books are great. I tried a Clive Cussler book but the slow pace of reading out loud killed it for me. She also has some CD's that will be good for car rides and not drive you out of your skull.
@sammydog01 I saw a random person at an airport reading that to her kid, and I started saying it along with her. I break out my inner Ethel Merman for the LA LA LAAAAAA!
@Pamtha That's why I love her books- they can be a bit different every time. We loved Pajama Time- pajammy to the left, pajammy to the right, jammy jammy jammy jammy P J.
Congratulations @Thumperchick and @Humper
My advice: Make sure your registry is available online (Amazon!) and then post it on a forum where lots of random people with disposable income can buy stuff and have it blind shipped to you.
I admit I did not read all the comments so forgive me if this is duplicative. If you are planning on using bottles at all, to feed or supplement breast feeding, Dr. Brown's bottles are da bomb and made a world of difference in the quantity of stomach gas my little ones had/did not have. Well worth the extra $ and time cleaning them.
Not on the registry but something I did and am so glad I did...I took the outfit my kids wore home from the hospital and when they outgrew them I sewed closed the neck, arm, and leg openings and stuffed them to make throw pillows for memorabilia of that time. Pretty cute really.
@cbilyak We have the Dr. Brown's bottles on the list! Cute idea for the clothes...
I've long been fascinated by lighting, both natural and artificial. The following NYT story mentions an interesting baby sleep aid - "Sleepy Baby bulb".
One wonders with these gadgets whether it is the power of suggestion (you believe it works and your baby senses your karma state) or true goodness that makes them "effective". Still, interesting and perhaps worth a $30 experiment, especially since it comes with a satisfaction guarantee. . .
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/12/business/energy-environment/high-tech-lights-to-help-baby-sleep-or-students-stay-alert.html
Congrats! Diaper Genie, for sure if you end up going disposable.
A good diaper pail, don't go cheap and try to rig your own system or buy a good diaper pail and then use cheap bags. A good setup will literally keep a heap of $hit not smelling for days on end. I recommend the Diaper Dekor Plus.
@Stallion Another suggestion, get a foam mattress for the crib, not a spring mattress. So much lighter when changing puke sheets in the middle of the night, vs the heavier bulky spring ones. Moonlight Slumber Little Dreamer crib matress is expensive but is dual sided so you can use it for a long while. Some cheaper ones still with great reviews on Amazon.
@Stallion Some other advice......Go on as many dates as possible now BEFORE the baby arrives, I'm 10000% serious! Enjoy quiet time, enjoy each other, do things you love to do. Babies put you both into #2 position and baby becomes #1. There is nothing better, but sacrifice comes with the territory so enjoy each other as a couple as much as you can before daddy's little girl arrives:)
Nothing to add for suggestions except CONGRATS, @Thumperchick and @Humper!
Congratulations! I used cloth diapers as burp cloths; to they're way more absorbent than actual burp cloths! Also, a few waterproof pads for a crib (if using one); that way you don't necessarily have to change the whole bedding out whenever there's a mess :)
I strongly second using the cheap prefold cloth diapers as burp cloths and getting more than you think you'll need.
Cribs--- the convertible cribs are big right now. If you get one and want to convert it. Buy all the parts at once. It's not good to be told anytime get the kit it will be fine. Then they have discontinued it a month later. Also if you buy a crib from toysrus give them about 3 months to get it in once you order. We ordered with 3 months till due date. It came in the week after he was born...
@sohmageek Costco carries nursery furniture. Just a thought.
@LaVikinga never thought of that... But we really liked the crib from toys r us... now we wish we had gotten something different...
@LaVikinga I wish we had a Costco nearby... we have a BJ's, but they just don't have the same price cut, or selection.
One last thing...you'll notice some changes in your body after delivery. I'm sure you're already up on the recommended pelvic floor exercises.
Investigate The Loop, or Minna Kgoal. These can help you even more because they offer instant feedback by syncing via bluetooth with your smart phone. It's like having an extra special personal trainer.
There's another brand in production but I can't recall the name.
Peeing when you sneeze is nothing to sneeze at. ;)
Congrats! A few items below which - as with a lot of baby advice - you should feel free to ignore.
Pre-birth:
If you're a hippie, Bradley Method class and doula. I was skeptical at first, but both ended up being great investments.
Stuff for kiddo:
- Baby Monitor with VOX
- Baby Jogger City Mini GT (head to a Buy Buy Baby and do a stroller test drive)
Cloth Diapering:
When we registered for baby stuff, we asked for an assortment of cloth diaper styles in the infant size. This gave us a better fit when our little girl was, well, little, and also let us see which style we liked before we invested in the larger ones. Results? We liked the pre-folds with covers for infants! Cheap when the baby is going through so many, and if the baby is breastfed, everything is water-soluble so no spraying required. Also, on the occasions when a disposable was required (trips, after rotovirus shot, etc.), slapping a cloth cover over the disposable saved a few blowouts...
When solids were introduced, we found that Bum Genius Freetime 2.0 was the way to go. AIO, so easy to put on for those not pumped about cloth diapers, but really easy to spray out, unlike some pocket diapers. Also, grab a couple of wet bags, one for right by the changing table, one to hang by the toilet.
Congrats again, and good luck!
@TracerSpiff not a total hippie, but we're registered for a hypnobirthing class.
We put several different brands/styles of cloth diapers on the registry and are telling people to grab whatever they want so we can test drive. Keep an eye out for the "holy shit, what did I do?" Cloth diaper thread early next year. :)
@TracerSpiff I did the Bradley Method for my children many, many years ago. I loved it! Was great for us.
Most places (Target, BabiesRUs, Amazon etc) will give you a completion discount for your registries. A month or so before your due date, you'll get mailed a bunch of coupons. Something like 15% off @ Target for any remaining registry items (They also sent 4 15% off for friends and family). BRU was 10% I believe. We took that opportunity to load our registry up with a bunch of stuff. Some of it was baby related, some wasn't, but it worked on everything. It saved us a ton of money.
Also, a few places like that also have registry gift bags with samples and stuff. If you plan to pump, check with your insurance, as a lot of times they will pay for one for you.
We are due in 8 days. I'll try to provide more helpful info once our little girl is here. Gratz again!
@lichme we scored goodie bags from Amazon, BuyBuyBaby, Babies r Us, & Target.
I'm so excited for you guys!!!
Essentials:
- A well-installed car seat in every car
- A single stroller
- Diapers & Wipes
- Clothes
- A pile of burp cloths in every corner of every room
- A high chair
- A couple bottles
- A single diaper bag
- A large, spare pack of diapers in the trunk of every car
- Netflix
- and if you travel, a Pack-n-play
You'll find that 90% of what you register for will go unused or under-used, but what the 10% is that "sticks" is hard to say.
Generally, I felt that the following things were a waste of good money because they were either useless, could be easily improvised, or took up more space / were more trouble than they were worth:
- Baby swing
- Multiple strollers
- Baby monitors
- Baby dishes, spoons, cups, etc.
- Bibs
- Bouncy seats
- Entertainment saucers
- Wipe warmers
- Bassinet
- Tummy time play mats
- Dreft
- Safety Gates
- Baby cleaning & hygine tools (bulbs, nail clippers, washcloths)
- Tub toys
- Baby Bjorn/Carrier
- Shopping cart covers
- Jumpers, Walkers
- Mobiles
- Fancy Bedding (a sheet and a blanket is all you wind up using)
TL;DR: If you have it, you'll use it, but you probably don't need it.
@JerseyFrank I'm with you on some of that stuff being unnecessary. Some we'll need to use though - with the stairs, the baby gate is a necessity, but we already have one so that'll save some $$!
I never did get the whole wipe & bottle warmer thing? If we're out and about, the kid's getting a less than warm wipe & bottle anyway, so they may as well get used to the idea. :)
@Thumperchick we didn't do wipe or bottle warmer. He didn't like cold formula but he liked cold milk :)
@sohmageek so you kept your wife's chest in the fridge?
@baqui63 nah it's at the foot of the bed. We lost the key a long time ago so who knows what's in her chest. Why do you ask?
@Thumperchick Look at garage sales or on Craigslist for things like Exersaucers, swings, Tummy Time play mats! Most of them are still in great shape, and A LOT cheaper! We ended up getting a high chair, Baby Einstein exersaucer thing, Boppy, baby swing and baby bouncer/seat thingy all for the cost of a brand new Baby Einstein exersaucer (and all of it was in almost brand new condition!) from Craigslist!
@sohmageek lololol
@MrsBeckett I concur or see if there is a facebook parent swap... In VT it's called kid swap VT. (not kids you swap just the stuff) We picked up a few things for super cheap ($2 for a few items) Parents are glad to get rid of the stuff and you're glad to get a bargain, some of them are quite old... but you know what... It's so worth it! If we weren't looking to have another, we would have some hand-me downs to for some people.
Congrats! Our little guy is just over a year now -- it's fun, hard, and meant to be a sacrifice... that really helped me get through some of the tough stuff.
I'm not going to pretend to having even read 1/10 of all those comments, so this definitely may be in there somewhere... but these Baby Bjorn bibs are awesome (especially so once the little one starts eating solid foods.
@luvche21 I was going to suggest this, too! My sis-in-law gave me a pink one because she felt weird putting a pink bib on her son.
@luvche21 We used them for our two. They were so easy to clean with the wipes we already carried with us, in a sink, or with a creek. Only one bib per child required, no matter how long the trip.
If you are breastfeeding, based on the wife, I would recommend the "My breast friend feeding pillow", worked way better than a boppy for her.
@MrMark That one's on the list! (Actually, I have both on the list, because the Boppy is so well loved, but I really like the Brest Friend.)
Aww, I'm so happy for you. You are going to be the bestest mom!
@Barney Aww, thanks!
Fingers crossed you let us help choose a name...
@becca Irk is probably off the table, but maybe we can shoot for Glen.
@JonT I dunno ...
Sooo ... Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the Third?
@becca
You need one of these:
Looking at everyone's crafting skills here, I bet someone could make you a couple.
@Bogie Weirdly, I have the stuff to make some needlepoint bibs...
Congrats!
As far as breastfeeding, talk to your doctor ahead of time so he knows your plan. Also reach out to friends, family, groups etc. You may need someone there after birth to help get a good start. If the baby doesn't latch on correctly it hurts. The nurses may be very helpful. Mine weren't, but that was almost 19 years ago. I kind of bumbled around for the first day until a lady came in from La Leche and helped. My nurses (military hospital) just wanted me to give up and stick him on formula.
Also look into creams for chapped nipples, and read up other problems that can come with nursing (blocked ducts, infections). So you can catch it and consult a doctor before things get too painful.
Not only will everyone give you advice, but they will stop you in the middle of the store to ask all kinds of questions, age/feeding/development/etc. The amount of stupid that comes out of complete strangers mouths when babies and small kids are around is just amazing.
I can't recommend strongly enough getting an angel care monitor or a snuza that will alert you when your baby's breathing slows or stops. Voice and/or video monitors just tell you when your baby is awake and safe but unhappy. That's important, but doesn't do a damn thing to warn you of a baby's biggest sleep time risk.
@frozenokie I poked around those. I understand why a lot of people feel more comfortable with those types of monitors. Unless there's an issue we need to keep track of, we won't be using them.
Speaker docks for every room.
@nadroj yep. The baby shower will be a speaker dock theme. Showered in speaker docks.
Oops, I'm late noticing this!
Anyway, my main advice is don't be afraid to change your mind about what you planned or how you thought things would work, especially based on anything you thought about before the kid was around. No sense feeling guilty just because reality was different than your guesses.
I'm very disappointed that no one has mentioned the Good Doctor (Seuss). One Fish Two Fish is a must.
Green Eggs
Hop on Pop is a good starter
Yurtle, Butter Battle, etc.
The thing is that his command of the language is exemplary even while being not only accessible but fun. And there are all sorts of subversive messages crammed in there. Swear to God, One Fish is one of the most profound and allusive books in the English language, if you're paying attention (I do that sometimes).
Also, begin a collection of Newberrys
and especially (again, for the infant years) Caldecotts
Books, @Thumperchick, lots of books. Am I wrong about this, @christinewas?
@joelmw The first piece of furniture we bought... was a bookcase. Both of us grew up with a love of reading that followed us into adulthood - merging our collections was difficult.
I hope to pass this onto the little one the same way my mom passed it onto me - lots of reading time.
@joelmw aha! i missed your post at first and put my book suggestions below. great mind my friend :)
@Thumperchick Have you started reading yet ? They say they can hear in there. So never too early for the good Dr. S. Also poetry is wonderful to get kids started on. You might like it too !
@Thumperchick - A Dr Seuss book meant to be read while the baby is in utero
Also, we bought a little pink homemade quilt that was made, I'm sure, by someone's grandmother. That thing was not only warmth and emotional comfort, but constant companion and prop (when she wasn't being a cat, @christinewas was the cutest little Virgin Mary, blanket placed strategically over her head; and she did this on her own). She literally wore it paper thin and to threads. I need to find one of the pictures of her as Mary (or just scan it; we've got it up at home). So adorable.
My wife breastfed and our kid had the good sense to never tolerate formula (not that we always appreciated it at the time). Here's one thing we never used.
And, yeah, it was in a breast pump kit. WTF?
@joelmw some people pump and bottle feed. Others use that handy tool to help clean out pump tubes.
@Thumperchick Yeah. I was mostly being facetious, though I was genuinely startled and then amused when I opened up the pack way back then. Oy, so many years ago.
One other thing. I don't know that they're actually any good and I couldn't tell you exactly what I ever learned from them, but we had a subscription to Parents Magazine. The kid was colicky and my one skill (other than reading and talking) was walking her to sleep; my wife read from the magazine while I paced. There was some good stuff in there; I just can't remember any specifics at the moment.
@Thumperchick congrats!
i have never had a baby, but i often buy stuff for showers and always went for larger clothing instinctively. it made sense to me that they would get tons of clothing and the baby would be huge by the time they got to my thing to put the baby in.
i also always buy books to start a library for the kid, because i love to pass on a love of books. my go to books are the complete winnie the pooh, and one of 2 neil gaiman books, instructions and blueberry girl. and really, you can never go wrong with doctor suess.
Rock n play sleeper and http://m.target.com/p/mybaby-by-homedics-soundspa-lullaby-relaxation-machine/-/A-10707864?ci_src=17588969&ci_sku=10707864&ref=tgt_adv_XSG10001&AFID=google_pla_df&CPNG=pla_baby+shopping&adgroup=sc_baby&LID=9pgs&KID=d0780b97-d414-4ca5-ac06-646fd707bf6e&kpid=10707864&gclid=CjwKEAjw7aiwBRCPgdu70arX70wSJADK6iDDp3Uacr5BbINMwHVknYPhlfzIqZ9PxSbVMck-PY9TpxoCdCbw_wcB
At nearly 4 years my kid is still out in minutes if I turn on the twinkle twinkle machine. Or play a youtube loop of it..
Oh and my book on baby led weaning was a godsend. He eats almost everything as a toddler and only had pureed food twice. Only choked a couple of times.
Oh- a good carseat. One that can stay rear facing for at least 2 years, if not 3 or 4, and that converts to forward facing. (We got our firstyears branded ones that work from 5 to 65 pounds on a wootoff for under $100 each)
So happy for you! Seems like everything got covered, above, except for the magical Boudreaux's Butt Paste. I used cloth diapers for my first baby, but now I wish I had used disposable just for the first month. But whatever you do will be fine. I also enjoyed using a breast pump sometimes so that we could go out for a couple of hours and so baby daddy could enjoy the bonding that feeding engenders. It's so amazing to see the cream rise to the top! The reason we heat the milk when it's been chilled is because newborns are not so good at body temp regulation. After a few months it's not as important.
Haven't read back all the way, but the one thing I'd throw out there -- as the little one starts to get mobile, don't go crazy with childproofing your house. Instead, focus on houseproofing your child. While the most critical things (poison/electrical/fire/falling hazards) should still be locked away, it will do you much more good in the long run to simply teach the child that certain things like drawers and cabinets and toilets are always off limits rather than install locking devices on every single openable object in the house. That way no matter where you take the kid outside your house, you don't have to worry so much about them getting into things they shouldn't.
Go crazy on learning and cognitive development.
Originator, Inc has some super awesome learning apps. I bought the entire Endless series with all the packs, since my son loves them.
(Most of the tablets made for kids seem like cheap and slow Android tablets with bumpers. A decent Android tablet or iPad with something like the Otterbox Defender case is a lot more useful)
You can also get cheap books through the Kindle reader app. I also just bought piles of books from Goodwill, donated them back when he outgrew them.
Find a place to trade, buy, and sell used baby stuff, then get stuff that is the right size, right when you need it. Avoid heavy stuff that "grows" with the child, if you can find light stuff that will be good for a few months. Just replace the light stuff with other light stuff as the child grows.
This applies to car seats, strollers, and much other equipment. You will discover that car seats have to go from your car, to the baby sitter's car, to grandma's car, etc... Light weight is good, especially for grandma.
Thirty Million Words: Building a Child's Brain
by Dana Suskind, Beth Suskind
I wish this book had been available when my son was young. I didn't need a book to tell me to talk to him, but the science looks so enlightening. I thought it might interest you, @Thumperchick and @humper.